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Episode 20 — Filipino Gollum

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Sean and Hayes take a moment to mug for the documentary crew cameras that have been following them around, talk about the love connection developing in The Amazing Race, and listen to a caller’s insane reality show story. Then, JEN STATSKY introduces herself to Sean and Hayes for the first time, discusses the dead cat episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians, and joins in on the fun of taking live calls. Plus, we hear from Sean’s high school buddy, Sean and Hayes get into the latest Survivor with a segment called This Kind of Racism Is Okay, and they break down the King of The Nerds finale to Jen.

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This made my day, you guys are great.

 

By the way Angelina Pivarnick's Kickstarter soared in popularity after the RSS publicity and absolutely destroyed its funding goal by raising...exactly $8,000.

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Hey guys, when I put on my shoes this morning, I noticed that they were filled with jelly. Do you think this could be related to the jelly you found on your headphones?

 

Something I noticed when I watched the video on Angelina's KS page: the shots of her on the couch are super low and she's practically looking down at the camera/phone from the couch. She literally couldn't find anyone (for instance: a friend) who could hold the camera at a normal angle and instead she had to prop it up on a coffee table or something. Also, we're all in agreement that Angelina was the one who funded the $4,000 for her KS so it wouldn't fail, right?

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Captains log, March 12, 2013, Delta Quadrant

 

Captain Han Luke here to break down a continuity error in the latest Starfleet Command Podcast! If you notice my call is at the end of the podcast, but when originally recorded, it was at the beginning! I assume due to some bad editing on Brett's end. Fear not, for next time I shall call in at the end of the recording, thus tricking Brett into placing my call at the beginning of the podcast!

 

Until next we meet,

 

Live Long and Prosper

Captain Han Luke Picard (son of Captain Jean Luc Picard)

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I think the Reality Show Show should do an investigative report on Sean Duffy, former Real World star, current U.S. Representative for the Wisconsin's 7th congressional district.

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A QUICK EPILOGUE to my story that got cut off after I made Sean and Hayes mad because my joke was too funny: Like Hayes, I figured his mom was just going along with the story since she didn't want to break the illusion, but he talked to her later and she told him it was all true.

 

THEN the psychic ladies came up to him after the shoot was done and said, "Sorry about that. It's a gift and a curse. Sometimes people get hurt" and they asked to give him a hug. After hugged him they looked at him funny and slowly backed away. They said "Are you straight?" and he said "YES I'm straight," and then he left the set in frustration. The End.

 

Also I did some research and here's how much each of your twitters are worth:

@jenstatsky is worth $5638

@seanclements is worth $1098

@hayesdavenport is worth $242

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A QUICK EPILOGUE to my story that got cut off after I made Sean and Hayes mad because my joke was too funny: Like Hayes, I figured his mom was just going along with the story since she didn't want to break the illusion, but he talked to her later and she told him it was all true.

 

THEN the psychic ladies came up to him after the shoot was done and said, "Sorry about that. It's a gift and a curse. Sometimes people get hurt" and they asked to give him a hug. After hugged him they looked at him funny and slowly backed away. They said "Are you straight?" and he said "YES I'm straight," and then he left the set in frustration. The End.

 

Also I did some research and here's how much each of your twitters are worth:

@jenstatsky is worth $5638

@seanclements is worth $1098

@hayesdavenport is worth $242

 

Yeah but did you see Vibes, Andy?

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Another great live, which I had the pleasure of listening to while on hold. When I finally got through it became apparent that I had dialed a local vietnamese market instead of the podcast. My bad!

 

Jen Statsky was a great guest, you should have her on again. Or if you don't want to double up, you could bring on Ngan Tran Dang, the owner of the local vietnamese market.

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Also, we're all in agreement that Angelina was the one who funded the $4,000 for her KS so it wouldn't fail, right?

 

I wish it was that simple. It turns out Engineer Brett threw the last 4K at the Kickstarter. Angelina called Earwolf crying and if you know anything about Brett, you know he can't stand to see a woman upset. He got backed into a corner, but now he's actually pretty excited about the project.

Brett keeps calling it his "ticket out," but I'm not totally sure about the direction he's taking this thing. It seems like the new "Brett-ified" version of the show is just Brett and Angelina riding around the city on Vespas and "talking boys" over Brett's famous chicken gumbo. I guess he's planning to sell the gumbo when the show takes off, but he won't even let anyone around the office try it. Strange vibe the past few days. We'll keep you posted.

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Captains log, March 12, 2013, Delta Quadrant

 

Captain Han Luke here to break down a continuity error in the latest Starfleet Command Podcast! If you notice my call is at the end of the podcast, but when originally recorded, it was at the beginning! I assume due to some bad editing on Brett's end. Fear not, for next time I shall call in at the end of the recording, thus tricking Brett into placing my call at the beginning of the podcast!

 

Until next we meet,

 

Live Long and Prosper

Captain Han Luke Picard (son of Captain Jean Luc Picard)

Captain, I can assure you I did not rearrange anything of the sort. You may have stumbled into an alternate universe, or someone could have divided by zero right at the moment you called in.

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Captain, I can assure you I did not rearrange anything of the sort. You may have stumbled into an alternate universe, or someone could have divided by zero right at the moment you called in.

 

Please, call me Captain Han Luke Picard, as you are an engineer and engineers rank below Captains on Starfleet vessels. Though you are an engineer, so I shall take your science advice into consideration as all good Captains must. I will get to the bottom of this temporal displacement! To the Q-zone!

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Captain, I can assure you I did not rearrange anything of the sort. You may have stumbled into an alternate universe, or someone could have divided by zero right at the moment you called in.

 

brett how's your other thing going? "project escape pod" or whatever you call it.

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I feel like a kindred reality show spirit to Sean's high school friend, although I think he was a little off by defending the integrity of Bar Rescue. In every g.d. episode one of "the best mixologists in the country" will come in and go on and on about how Smirnoff is a premium brand. Um, can you say sponsorship much?

 

Other than that, our tastes aligned exactly and I think he uncovered a pretty glaring absence in the Reality SHOW Show repertoire - Outside of Top Chef, they don't talk about any other Bravo shows. They're missing out on Vanderpump, they're missing out on Gallery Girls, and don't get me started on Start Up Silicon Valley. I grew up in Silicon Valley and that show- as I assume what being a waitress is like to Vanderpump Rules- was like looking into a mirror of my life. They all have the classic Reality Tv ingredients: People with skills ranging from zero to ordinary getting drunk, being forced to say mean things about each other in confessionals, and one or two of them gets edited to look crazy or villainous. Now that's good tv.

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brett how's your other thing going? "project escape pod" or whatever you call it.

i told you to keep this quiet. it's going alright, i need more mechanical jelly though.

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So I know this doesn't have anything to do with this week's episode... But I thought I'd create a homage to my favorite episode, beat that chocolate.

 

2012-04-09-peeps-smores-fat-580.jpg

 

 

I want to go on record that when I saw this episode of shark tank, I felt really bad for telling my girlfriend that I thought this lady looked like of a compost pile. I felt really terrible for saying that. It made me feel like a grade a jerk when I agreed with her response, saying that she reminded her of a slop hole that small minded animals would feed and bath at. We both just felt awful...

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we've got genevieve and virgil from King of the Nerds coming in on Saturday. Get your questions ready, gang! Virgil likes to program in Python and he is doing a thesis on quantifying consciousness. Genevieve writes young adult fantasy novels that crib from Biblical mythology. It's gonna be fun!

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