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Episode 133 - The Quest

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Not-so-subtle racism aside, the African warrior represented the continent as a whole as there were virtually no countries on the continent until the decolonization period following WW2. At the time this movie took place, the only independent nations in Africa were Liberia, the Kingdom of South Africa, and the Kingdom of Egypt. For example if he were from the area now known as ghana, he would then be representing England.

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Not-so-subtle racism aside, the African warrior represented the continent as a whole as there were virtually no countries on the continent until the decolonization period following WW2. At the time this movie took place, the only independent nations in Africa were Liberia, the Kingdom of South Africa, and the Kingdom of Egypt. For example if he were from the area now known as ghana, he would then be representing England.

 

I'm 100% sure this is what they striving for: historical accuracy.

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I wish there were a Mike Tyson Punch Out movie for this show to cover.

 

You know what? I'd go so far as to say that Mike Tyson's Punch-Out is more cinematic than The Quest. There's a coherent plotline, the contestants have personalities and comprehensible motivations, the music is dramatic, and it has a training sequence!

 

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pretending like the Kumite was some special event and not just basically a warehouse half the size of a middle school basketball court crammed full of unwashed peasants with a single platform in the middle and hard wooden benches

 

But as accurate as that is as an objective description, Bloodsport does somehow make the Kumite feel like an epic event. It's hard to put a finger on exactly why. Is it the music? The fight choreography giving more of a sense of stakes and danger? The passage through the corridors (filmed at the actual Kowloon Walled City) giving both more of a buildup and, paradoxically, more of a sense of focus, while the globetrotting and larger scale of The Quest overshadows the tournament itself?

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Told you guys you should've done Double Impact. The Quest is trying to capture that Bloodsport magic again, but Kickboxer would've been a better choice if you were going for that.

 

It occurs to me that maybe instead of trying to be another straightforward action flick like Bloodsport, The Quest is actually JCVD's attempt at a prestige picture. It all fits: the period setting, the lavish cinematography, JCVD stepping up to writer-director as his attempt at a Rocky, with the French mime getup being the cherry on top of perfect pretentiousness. (Using stilts instead of a unicycle is just about the only thing keeping him from being "objectively speaking, the most annoying person on earth" as A.O. Scott said of the French mime juggler unicyclist of The Walk.) "Pretentious" of course being the word in the English language that least applies to Bloodsport.

 

I rarely say this, but Cannon's attempt at prestige movies are actually more successful. And when they failed, at least they gave us stuff like this:

 

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The Dollop podcast did a great episode on Count Dante if you want to follow up on what Jon was saying about the Dojo Wars: http://thedollop.lib...34-counte-dante

Thanks for that link! I spent a lot of time last night reading about Count Dante, and he sounds even crazier than Dux, so I can't wait to listen to this.

 

I don't have a ton else to add to the conversation because I was sure this wasn't coming out until at least Monday, so I haven't watched the movie yet. I saw it a few years back, and literally the only thing I remembered was the weird clown part.

 

Anyway, y'all are doing a great job hitting the major points. Dick pics all around!

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Sigh, it always ends up with me posting a cock pic

 

 

roosters_for_kids_320.jpg

 

 

I stand corrected. Your cock is quite magnificent.

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One minor correction, Ong Bak: Thai Warrior was in modern time, however, the second and third movies were in feudal Siam during the 1400s.

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Anyone else get the feeling that Dux and Van Damme came up with the idea for this movie playing Punch Out like the arcade scene in Bloodsport? They just saw the stereotypical characters in Punch Out, and just applied them to this movie, even down to the Spanish Flamenco fighter.

 

5139f2fe59ede2e86feeb31d1215b411-650-80.jpg

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I see Punch Out was already brought up/

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Sigh, it always ends up with me posting a cock pic

 

 

roosters_for_kids_320.jpg

 

hey I like that cock!

 

do you guys get the feeling that JCVD could swing both ways. ? I know he's got a wife or had been married and has a kids. after seeing some of the pictures on the net of him, it's got me wondering.

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I have a question in regard to the tournament itself. It seems, since the fighters are introduced by country rather than name, that this is a "best fighter from every country" kind of deal. However, if that's the case, how come Japan fights Okinawa? Wouldn't that be like having a fighter from America and New York? That hardly seems fair. Especially considering there's only one fighter from Africa! And just between you and me--writers, producers, directors, and actors in this movie--I cannot stress enough how much Africa is not a fucking country.

 

To be fair: Okinawa once was something like a country and not part of Japan. But that was before 1879 and between 1945 and 1972.

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hey I like that cock!

 

do you guys get the feeling that JCVD could swing both ways. ? I know he's got a wife or had been married and has a kids. after seeing some of the pictures on the net of him, it's got me wondering.

 

JCVD is definitely suspect!

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As amazing as the tournament stereotype characters were in this movie, I can't help but think that JCVD really dropped the ball on representing nations. Taking place in 1925 while the planet was still in the aftermath of WWI, this was the perfect setup to have the fighters represent the major and minor players of the Great War. But besides that, what was with having one fighter represent all of Africa while giving Okinawa its own character- who by the way, was a pretty poor fighter coming from the birthplace of Mr. Miyagi? Okinawa is less than 700 square miles with a current population of 1.385 million people versus Africa's 11.67 million square miles and 1.111 billion people! The next closest misrepresentation of land mass was the Soviet Union clocking in at 8.65 million square miles with its highest population of 293 million people. But to be fair, most of that land mass is made up of the icy hell of Siberia. On top of that, Okinawa had been under Japanese rule since it was annexed in 1879 (and still is today). JCVD could have at least thrown in a stereotypical "walk like an Egyptian" fighter in addition to the Zulu warrior. I think that Africa got the short end of the stick, but at least had some sick intro dance moves. I guess the tournament was the US Senate of tournaments where Rhode Island gets as many senators as California. It's time to reboot the Quest with Street Fighter characters.

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This may be a nitpick-y correction, but when Jon says that, if this had been Bloodsport, Jackson would have fought to Lynyrd Skynyrd, he uses the common mispronunciation Lin-nerd Skin-nerd. The correct pronunciation is Leh-nerd Skin-nerd, which is made clear by the title of their first album "Pronounced Leh-nerd Skin-nerd".

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This may be a nitpick-y correction, but when Jon says that, if this had been Bloodsport, Jackson would have fought to Lynyrd Skynyrd, he uses the common mispronunciation Lin-nerd Skin-nerd. The correct pronunciation is Leh-nerd Skin-nerd, which is made clear by the title of their first album "Pronounced Leh-nerd Skin-nerd".

 

 

...

 

 

FREEBIRD!!

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Does anyone else think JCVD was on a Les Mis kick when he did this movie? Because this movie feels a lot like Les Mis had a weird deformed baby with Bloodsport, even to the point that there are at least two scenes where "Work Song (Look Down)" plays when JCVD is being beaten.

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You guys failed to mention an eyebrow detail that caused me to lose my mind,

 

At one point, the Mongolian guy wipes the sweat off his brow by putting his finger at the outside of his left eyebrow, moving across both eyebrows and finishing at the outside of his right eyebrow.

 

Now, everyone knows that you wipe your eyebrows from the inside out, starting at the bridge of your nose and moving to the end of one eyebrow, then the other, or you use two fingers, both starting at the middle and moving to the outside. You don't start from the outside and move in because this would cause your eyebrow hairs to get messed up. The way the Mongolian guy did it would have been fine for his right eyebrow but messed up his left eyebrow.

 

So when I saw the guy start wiping his left eyebrow from the outside in I thought, "This is going to be a mess for sure." But then it cuts to a reaction shot of JCVD's face, then cuts back to the Mongolian guy's finger already completing it's journey at the end of the right eyebrow. The entire center part of the wiping was cut. The reason for this editing is clearly that the actor must have messed up his left eyebrow. They had to get hair and makeup in to fix it, and then do a new take with his finger already on his right eyebrow.

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So maybe it was just the version I watched, and theres a directors cut with 2 seconds extra footage, but why didn't China vs Brazil warrant an announcement?

 

That was the only one in the movie I believe where the fighters just popped into the ring to fight each other on their own. Was it an editing mistake, or was it somewhat unsanctioned and the Chinese fighter was getting psyched into his monkey role for the next match, and the Brazilian was wearing a Carmen Miranda hat and everything just spiraled out of control? And the tournament judges, being kinda loosey goosey already, just rolled with it?

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I saw this with some friends when it first came out. We did not intend to see it, in fact we went to the theater to see Mulholland Falls. However, one of my friends, probably the only JVCD fan in our group wanted to see The Quest. The rest of our group wanted to stick to the original plan but he protested and presented his case as to why he didn't want to see Mulholland Falls. He said he didn't want to see a movie with so many hats...yeah 'hats'. Now, there are indeed a lot of hats in Mulholland Falls, but in The Quest, EVERYBODY'S WEARING FUCKING HATS! Hats hats hats all over the fucking place. I don't think we see a scene where Roger Moore isn't wearing a hat. I wish I could say that was the only time my friend had ever duped me into seeing a shitty movie, but he'd pulled the same kind of thing and got me to go see The Power Ranger Movie. Maybe my friend was some sort of Svengali who had the power to get anyone to see the worst movies with any dumb reason.

I forgot what Mulholland Falls was and had to Google it to remember, which led me to finding THIS image of Jennifer Connelly associated with it....

normal_mulholland_falls1.jpg

 

Um, I think we know which film everyone on Earth should be seeing. JCVD is one beautiful man, but, with nary a split or shirtless training montage in The Quest, I'd say Mulholland Falls wins out.

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