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Episode 156 - xXx: Return of Xander Cage: LIVE!

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Not to spoil your love of her but unless she's changed a lot since she moved to the US she's pretty awful in real life.

I started to suspect this might be the case when she was hanging out with Taylor Swift a ton tbh lol.

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Not to spoil your love of her but unless she's changed a lot since she moved to the US she's pretty awful in real life.

 

Go on...

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I started to suspect this might be the case when she was hanging out with Taylor Swift a ton tbh lol.

If it's any consolation, Keanu is a big ol' teddy bear. He came to Fantastic Fest two years in a row and almost seemed amazed at the fact that people were there to see him.

 

I may have told this story before on the forums, but I was working the swag table my first year, and John Wick was playing (he had been there the year before for Man of Tai Chi). He showed up and did the whole red carpet thing. He walked in with a security detail, but he just kind of looked around the lobby and slowly took everything in. If it was me, I'd be bee-lining to where I needed to be, but he was just so chill about it all. He went in and introduced John Wick. Then he came out once the movie started and went to the bar. He ordered a drink and then went to the various tables in the lobby and thanked everyone for being there. Then he went outside, and this is where things are a little strange. I saw a woman come up to him. He gave her a big hug, and he took a picture with her. And then as he started walking off, I saw her start crying and kind of losing her shit. He went back and gave her a big hug, and then he went back inside.

 

I talked to a close friend later and just mentioned that Keanu had been there and that he was such a friendly dude and had taken the time to come around to the volunteers and be cool as fuck. And he told me that the woman I had seen outside was actually his coworker. She was at the theater for karaoke at the bar that's attached to the theater, and she saw this dude standing out there alone smoking a cigarette. She said she felt like she recognized him, but she couldn't put a finger on who he was. So she went up and talked to him. She told him she knew he was a famous person, but she couldn't place him and would be really mad the next day when she figured out who he was.

 

And, according to her, he was very sweet, and he took the picture. And then when she said, "I'm so sorry, but what was your name?"

 

He said, "Keanu Reeves."

 

And that's apparently where she just fucking lost it. Then Keanu hugged her. She apologized profusely for not recognizing him, but he was so chill about it and was just like, "It's okay. There are a lot of people here."

 

Ever since then, I've been a devout Keanu fan and will see anything he's in, because he is straight up as polite and friendly as everyone says he is.

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My experience with her happened when she was a big vj on MTV here she agreed to come and do a talk and a little bit of presenting at a charity night thing that I was working on.

 

She seemed really sweet over the phone and just asked that we had a couple of beers for her in the green room. On the night though a totally different story she showed up over 40 minutes late with a whole group of friends making a lot of noise and proceeded to get massively drunk, she was supposed to come up and speak for about 15 minutes about the charity and hand out the awards.

 

She ended up racing through it in about 5 minutes missing a lot of the important stuff she was supposed to hit and left immediately after handing out the awards, she refused to talk to or take pictures with any of the award winners or performers about 90% of whom were high school students who loved her, and the worst bit was when she left we found out that her group had spent about $1500 over the bar saying that we would pay for it, which was a lot of money for a small charity (MTV ended up giving the money back after a big fuss was made).

 

A lot of people I know work in the film and television industry over here and they said she was notorious for being late and talking to crew members like crap, she moved to the US to get into bigger projects but it was also apparently because she was starting to have trouble getting work here because of her reputation. I know she struggled for a while when she moved to the US and I genuinely hope she's grown up a lot and is a nicer person now.

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Australians are terrible people tbqh

 

I blame the entire country for breaking Howard Kremer's heart.

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Australians are terrible people tbqh

 

That's actually written on our passports. We know.

Our country runs a prison island for refugees kept in indefinate incarceration and is illegal under international law. So yeah.

 

Everyone talking about Ruby Rose as if we are supposed to know who that is. I have never heard of her before. On imdb she has barely any credits. Who cares and plus if she's Australian who cares even more.

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I FOUND THE FUCKING VIDEO!

 

 

I had to do some CSI audio shit to find it.

 

Check out the comments below the video. Vin Diesal fans are really concerned about his health or really defensive. For a man who looks like a penis he sure has some sincerely devoted fans.

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So in the podcast Paul discussed how only Xander Cage's face survived after he was apparently killed in the sequel film, and Jason discussed the possibility that in "XXX: The Return of Xander Cage," Xander's face was being worn by one of his killers. How amazing would it be if that were true, that Xander's face was being worn in this movie by a terrorist in need of redemption, and that the Triple X series and the film "Face/Off" were part of the same cinematic universe? The next movie could have the XXX team facing off against Nicolas Cage and/or John Travolta! Xander Cage versus Nicolas Cage!

 

If that's not awesome enough, let's take it up another level. We already know that God's Eye from Fast and Furious 8 was a computer program created by Ramsay to take control of various satellites and computer programs. Is it too hard to believe that Ramsay also created Pandora's Box too, which also takes control of satellites, if only to crash them? After all, we never learn the identity of the person who created Pandora's Box. We are sitting on a "How Did This Get Made" trifecta, bringing together XXX, Fast and Furious, and Face/Off. How CAN This Get Made?

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I didn't watch this cheeseball movie because by the time it was announced on the minisode, it was already out of the theater and I sure as hell wasn't about to drive all over the damn state looking for it. However, what did occur to me as I listened to the podcast was that the whole point of the xXx program was to take seemingly unrelated (and arguably useless) fields and shoehorn them into intelligence assets that miraculously fit into the plot. You know, skateboarding, soccer, DJ-ing, and so on. This idea sounded really familiar to me. Where had I seen something like this before? Let's see... unrelated sports field... secret mission for shadowy government organization... then it hit me.

 

xXx is really a sequel to Gymkata!

 

It all makes sense. A pommel horse in the middle of a medieval village placed just so, ski poles on a jungle mountain placed just so. Do you see the pattern here?

 

gymkata-xander.jpg

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I'm just listening to this now, but I would argue:

 

Vin Diesel + Evil Ernest =

 

Premiere+HBO+Films+Clear+History+Red+Carpet+fr_FXaOPTAbl.jpg

 

Paul is perfect for June!

 

 

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If it's any consolation, Keanu is a big ol' teddy bear. He came to Fantastic Fest two years in a row and almost seemed amazed at the fact that people were there to see him.

 

I may have told this story before on the forums, but I was working the swag table my first year, and John Wick was playing (he had been there the year before for Man of Tai Chi). He showed up and did the whole red carpet thing. He walked in with a security detail, but he just kind of looked around the lobby and slowly took everything in. If it was me, I'd be bee-lining to where I needed to be, but he was just so chill about it all. He went in and introduced John Wick. Then he came out once the movie started and went to the bar. He ordered a drink and then went to the various tables in the lobby and thanked everyone for being there. Then he went outside, and this is where things are a little strange. I saw a woman come up to him. He gave her a big hug, and he took a picture with her. And then as he started walking off, I saw her start crying and kind of losing her shit. He went back and gave her a big hug, and then he went back inside.

 

I talked to a close friend later and just mentioned that Keanu had been there and that he was such a friendly dude and had taken the time to come around to the volunteers and be cool as fuck. And he told me that the woman I had seen outside was actually his coworker. She was at the theater for karaoke at the bar that's attached to the theater, and she saw this dude standing out there alone smoking a cigarette. She said she felt like she recognized him, but she couldn't put a finger on who he was. So she went up and talked to him. She told him she knew he was a famous person, but she couldn't place him and would be really mad the next day when she figured out who he was.

 

And, according to her, he was very sweet, and he took the picture. And then when she said, "I'm so sorry, but what was your name?"

 

He said, "Keanu Reeves."

 

And that's apparently where she just fucking lost it. Then Keanu hugged her. She apologized profusely for not recognizing him, but he was so chill about it and was just like, "It's okay. There are a lot of people here."

 

Ever since then, I've been a devout Keanu fan and will see anything he's in, because he is straight up as polite and friendly as everyone says he is.

Maybe we don't want to turn this into a John Wick appreciation thread, but I will gladly turn this into a Keanu Appreciation thread. The Bill and Ted movies have been giving me joy since I rented them on VHS from fucking Blockbuster (maybe I was 8 or 9 years old?). So from those to Speed, to his brilliant role in Parenthood, to The Matrix, to his directorial debut with Man of Tai Chi, I fucking love him. Hell, I even love the documentary he produced and hosted about the transition from film to digital in filmmaking called Side by Side (it's fantastic, btw. You get to watch Christopher Nolan debate via Keanu-as-proxy with George Lucas, among dozens of others, about the merits and drawbacks of digital filmmaking). I am 100% ALL IN on Keanu. I will watch him in anything and he is wonderful.

 

giphy.gif

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Maybe we don't want to turn this into a John Wick appreciation thread, but I will gladly turn this into a Keanu Appreciation thread. The Bill and Ted movies have been giving me joy since I rented them on VHS from fucking Blockbuster (maybe I was 8 or 9 years old?). So from those to Speed, to his brilliant role in Parenthood, to The Matrix, to his directorial debut with Man of Tai Chi, I fucking love him. Hell, I even love the documentary he produced and hosted about the transition from film to digital in filmmaking called Side by Side (it's fantastic, btw. You get to watch Christopher Nolan debate via Keanu-as-proxy with George Lucas, among dozens of others, about the merits and drawbacks of digital filmmaking). I am 100% ALL IN on Keanu. I will watch him in anything and he is wonderful.

 

giphy.gif

Keanu gets a bad rap for being wooden, which he is, but if he's put in the right role he's AMAZING. While he can give laughably bad performances in films like Dracula or Devil's Advocate, any role where he gets a chance to be a grizzled, no-nonsense action star he excels, like in Speed, Street Kings, the Wick films, and the first Matrix.

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Okay but June yelling, "It's a coat!" over and over is so far my favorite moment of this episode

It was my favourite part too, maybe tied with the Cool Rider Second Opinion Theme

 

Nina Dobrev's character angered me on such a visceral level. I get that she's a weird Q/Moneypenny composite but seriously Vin Diesel is not attractive. This is the second time I've disagreed with June on attractiveness, the other being Evil Earnest. I don't like when we're not on the same page.

 

I watched this movie the night before the podcast came out and glad I did. It was insane. Everything I took issue with, the crew brought it up. Real talk, 8/10 watch this movie again.

 

My biggest gripe about this movie was actually how self-aware it is. Vin does not need a quippy one-liner (or his attempts at one) every time he talks. His character always needs the last word.

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Keanu gets a bad rap for being wooden, which he is, but if he's put in the right role he's AMAZING. While he can give laughably bad performances in films like Dracula or Devil's Advocate, any role where he gets a chance to be a grizzled, no-nonsense action star he excels, like in Speed, Street Kings, the Wick films, and the first Matrix.

 

I couldn't agree more. You took the words out of my mouth. He's not at all wooden in Bill and Ted and he's amazing in My Own Private Idaho. People think of the Matrix where he is supposed to be wooden. He's not good in The Devil's Advocate but no one is good in that movie. Al Pacino is doing a Nicolas Cage level performance and everyone looks like a puppet in comparison. I agree John Wick works really well with Keanu, I haven't seen the second one yet but the first one was great. The dog plot had no hint of irony and he is amazing in that movie.

 

I remember those photos from the 90s where someone found him sharing breakfast with a homeless guy. Anyone else I'd assume it was faked for the press but I believe it about Keanu. Plus he gave up some of his salary for the Matrix sequels to put into pay for the special effects crews. In a town full of douchebags he seems like a rare genuine guy. I'm all in on the Keanu love in this forum.

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I remember reading that the Wachowskis wanted to play up the mysteriousness of Neo and allow Keanu to play up his strengths by only him speak five words at a time at most. Then they did the sequels and tried to expand on their psuedo-babble and it went downhill from it.

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I'm just listening to this now, but I would argue:

 

Vin Diesel + Evil Ernest =

 

Premiere+HBO+Films+Clear+History+Red+Carpet+fr_FXaOPTAbl.jpg

 

Paul is perfect for June!

 

I did some Animorphs shit and your hypothesis checks out.

 

mZxCt2y.jpg

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Not to spoil your love of her but unless she's changed a lot since she moved to the US she's pretty awful in real life.

Couldn't STAND her on Orange is the New Black.

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That's actually written on our passports. We know.

Our country runs a prison island for refugees kept in indefinate incarceration and is illegal under international law. So yeah.

 

Everyone talking about Ruby Rose as if we are supposed to know who that is. I have never heard of her before. On imdb she has barely any credits. Who cares and plus if she's Australian who cares even more.

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The non-fighting DJ makes sense, and here's why:

 

In the US Military (as well as in many other militaries around the world) we have military chaplains. They hold an Officer rank, are classified as noncombatants and are prohibited from bearing arms. Their purpose is to serve the spiritual needs of military members and families. The xXx team doesn't quite exude Christian values, and so their spiritual needs are met through electronic music. This parallel is consistent with the Vin Diesel philosophy: when your family fails you, friends become your Family. When your religion fails you, music becomes your religion.

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So, Jason mentioned the episode of The Chris Gethard Show that he and Paul were on back in June, and if you haven't seen it, you definitely should:

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nwi_kE0gy94

 

I hadn't seen a single episode of TCGS, and now I might have to go back and watch all of them. It's 43 minutes of the two of them just fucking with Chris Gethard, and it's totally hilarious. Jason is exactly what you'd expect, but Paul really gets into it more than I thought he would. It's perfection.

 

PS - Jason's expression in the preview frame is a perfect encapsulation of the episode.

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So, Jason mentioned the episode of The Chris Gethard Show that he and Paul were on back in June, and if you haven't seen it, you definitely should:

 

I hadn't seen a single episode of TCGS, and now I might have to go back and watch all of them. It's 43 minutes of the two of them just fucking with Chris Gethard, and it's totally hilarious. Jason is exactly what you'd expect, but Paul really gets into it more than I thought he would. It's perfection.

 

PS - Jason's expression in the preview frame is a perfect encapsulation of the episode.

 

I was gonna be so mad if nobody guessed the correct answer.

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