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I think this would be a perfect addition. I see nothing better than ripping into the Friday the 13th franchise for making the pile of garbage known as "Jason X". What could be better than "Jason Voorhees in space"! The film is rife with things to talk about, like the nearly-all Canadian/sci-fi franchise actors, the extreme nonchalance of most of the crew even at the face of a demented serial killer, and how everybody is fucking everybody. The only person who doesn't get fucked is Jason. And let's not forget such incredible quotes as:

"Hey Slappy! I got a little something for ya."
"Um, what's a bike?"
and, of course...
"...oh man."

Continuity and scientific errors abound, this movie would make Roland Emmerich question what's going on.

And, in closing, I give you this scene. It is quite amazing.

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Just saw this last night, but it is a horrible movie. Bad lines and then Jason gets an upgrade by nanites for some reason.

 

Terrible movie.

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It's played for laughs, at least for most of its length, which might make it a tough one to do. I love it, but I'd love to hear the gang rag on it for 40 minutes.

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How do you improve upon a near perfect series like the Friday the 13th franchise?

 

Cyborg Jason. In the future. In space.

 

And if that's not enough to sell it, there is an android with faulty magnetic nipples.

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God that horrible hologram room with the two virtual campers who show their ample tits and ask Jason if he wants premarital sex was just laughably bad, and this is from a series which featured a killer who drowned as a boy SWIMMING to Manhattan.

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God that horrible hologram room with the two virtual campers who show their ample tits and ask Jason if he wants premarital sex was just laughably bad, and this is from a series which featured a killer who drowned as a boy SWIMMING to Manhattan.

From drowning victim to Olympic-class swimmer over the span of 8 movies, and people claim there's no character development in these films? I know, it's pretty subtle, so you may have missed it. Of course, that subtlety would get hacked to pieces and buried in an unmarked grave once Jason became a demonic force of nature, which was before he became an astronaut...

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From drowning victim to Olympic-class swimmer over the span of 8 movies, and people claim there's no character development in these films? I know, it's pretty subtle, so you may have missed it. Of course, that subtlety would get hacked to pieces and buried in an unmarked grave once Jason became a demonic force of nature, which was before he became an astronaut...

 

 

Hey, you think THAT'S impressive, don't overlook Jason's suddenly amazing skills in such things as archery in the remake/reboot/Michael Bay-ified Friday the 13th. He's a remarkably gifted athlete!

 

Another potential topic movie... but you have to give the edge to Jason X with it's own, built-in review when one of the characters utters the line, "Oh, this sucks on so many levels!"

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Robots. Space. The Future. Bad Puns. Jason. What do all of these have in common? Jason X.

A movie so bad you will be asking yourself, "how did this get made?".

Before the Freddy vs. Jason project was moonlighted by New Line Cinema, writers decided to excite fans with another tale of the machete weilding, hockey mask wearing, camp counseler slashing psycho path, by, that's right, SHOOTING HIM IN TO SPACE.

No longer owning the rights to the Friday the 13th franchise, the writers decided to call this one Jason X. (X standing for 10, because it is the 10th in the series, but not really) Not only is this movie terrible, but it is enjoyabley terrible. Please, give this the HDTGM treatment. I am begging you!

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I don't know what the deal was, I'm sure there was some sort of legal wrangling, but none of the New Line installments ("Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday", "Jason X", "Freddy Vs. Jason") had "Friday the 13th" in the title. Fortunately (?), the character of Jason is just as recognizable as the brand name, so you don't have to slap the name on it for people to know what it is. It must have been really tricky, which is weird, because it's well known that Paramount (which is where the series originated) clearly did not give a shit or respect the franchise except for the money it brought it them. Maybe they just sold New Line the character and not the name?

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That's right: JASON X. The Friday the 13th films transition into sci-fi future spaceshippy murder and the results are incredible. Keep in mind, I'm not recommending this as one of those, "this is hard to watch, it's painful and awful and you shouldn't see it." It's amazing in it's badness. I'll even hear an argument that it's a GOOD film due it's hilarious bad scenes. It's a combination of all the nonsense of unkillable horror tropes combined with sci-fi technobabble cliches, and the results are both worth watching and worth mocking.

 

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Clearly I am not the first person to suggest this. That's my bad. But it's also THEIR BAD for not doing this movie as of yet. I mean, c'mon.

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This movie was a Canadian co-production, and as we've learned over the years with HDTGM, that's usually a sure sign of problems (sorry Canada).

 

This movie stars Lexa Doig, who has not aged a day since 2001. Seriously. Look her up. SHE DOES NOT AGE.

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This movie stars Lexa Doig, who has not aged a day since 2001. Seriously. Look her up. SHE DOES NOT AGE.

 

Probably why they had her play Talia on Arrow. Ageless. It's amazing.

 

And on that note, I do wonder it they'll bring up that this movie stars not one, but two stars from Gene Roddenberry's Andromeda.

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