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JulyDiaz

Episode 173.5 - Minisode 173.5

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Raisins in my cereal? Raisins in my cookies? I'm good with that. Raisins in my coleslaw? Blech.

Raisins in cookies are deceitful assholes

 

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Look I thought we all came to the conclusion that we would at least try raisins in our coleslaw. Just a bite. See how it is, and then decide to discard them or not. I'm far from a raisin apologist but we all like grapes right? It's the same thing. Now does it belong in coleslaw? Again are we talking mayo coleslaw or vinegar coleslaw? There are a lot of factors here.

 

First of all, I'm not eating any coleslaw. It's worse than raisins. Secondly, raisins go in oatmeal cookies and nowhere else.

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Raisins in cookies are deceitful assholes

 

20c306300dd0127a93efbdc316786d29--raisin-cookies-chocolate-chip-cookies.jpg

I will eat raisins plain. I will eat raisins in trail mix. I will not eat raisins in cookies. I'm all about societal integration, but when it comes to food, these should not mix. Just like taco pizza.

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I will not eat raisins in cookies.

Sorry but when it comes to oatmeal raisin cookies

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I wasn't aware until last week that A1 sauce was partially made up of raisins.

SO THAT IS WHY IT IS DISGUSTING.

 

Wow. We solved that one.

 

RE: Raisins in cookies. I'm fine with raisins in cookies or anything sweet. I don't like them in savory stuff. They are fruit. They don't belong there. That's just science.

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Look I thought we all came to the conclusion that we would at least try raisins in our coleslaw. Just a bite. See how it is, and then decide to discard them or not. I'm far from a raisin apologist but we all like grapes right? It's the same thing. Now does it belong in coleslaw? Again are we talking mayo coleslaw or vinegar coleslaw? There are a lot of factors here.

 

All I'm saying is give raisins a chance.

 

Wait, coleslaw has both mayo and vinegar in it.

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Raisins in cookies are deceitful assholes

 

20c306300dd0127a93efbdc316786d29--raisin-cookies-chocolate-chip-cookies.jpg

Sorry if this comes across as confrontational, but what kind of person can't visually discern between chocolate chip and oatmeal raisin cookies? I've never, ever bit into one while expecting the other. Your misery seems, to me, entirely self-inflicted. Just like a mother duck.

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Okay Bands/Artists I would put in my my top 10 and just realized: George Jones. When Frank Sinatra (reportedly) says he is the second best singer in the world, you listen. I know country music from that era (and I'm not a huge C&W fan) has a rep for being "twangy" and what not, but him and Hank Williams Sr had something special.

 

Bands I should like but I don't, The Civil Wars and Mumford and Sons. Sorry they just don't do it for me.

 

Third, raisins DO NOT BELONG IN COLESLAW (I also don't approve of grapes in chicken salad). I get WHY (trying to offset the tanginess of vinegar with a natural sweetner instead of sugar) but no.

 

Fourth, TOTAL LONG SHOT here, but I a short monologue I wrote was accepted for a reading at the Samuel FrenchBookstore in Hollywood (WHOO!) and I had an actor lined up to perform it. Unfortunately, she had to drop out due to a film project running long. Is there anyone around here that is an actor (struggling working, whatever) that would like the chance to perform a 3-minute piece? If so, LET ME KNOW LOL I have reached out to a few others and I'm waiting to hear from and the organizer did say she could help too but I want to help people I know.

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Sorry if this comes across as confrontational, but what kind of person can't visually discern between chocolate chip and oatmeal raisin cookies? I've never, ever bit into one while expecting the other. Your misery seems, to me, entirely self-inflicted. Just like a mother duck.

I legit bought a cookie from a store to hide in my purse before a concert and the cashier said, "Be careful those are Chocolate Chip and Oatmeal Raisin combined and we can't really tell which is which."

 

I had to turn them over and really inspect to be able to tell because they honestly did look the exact fucking same on top.

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I legit bought a cookie from a store to hide in my purse before a concert and the cashier said, "Be careful those are Chocolate Chip and Oatmeal Raisin combined and we can't really tell which is which."

 

I had to turn them over and really inspect to be able to tell because they honestly did look the exact fucking same on top.

 

That's why you only get Oatmeal is with butterscotch. I haven't seen anyone tri to combine raisins with those.

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I legit bought a cookie from a store to hide in my purse before a concert and the cashier said, "Be careful those are Chocolate Chip and Oatmeal Raisin combined and we can't really tell which is which."

 

I had to turn them over and really inspect to be able to tell because they honestly did look the exact fucking same on top.

Please don't think I'm impugning the legitimacy of your past trauma. I'm on record as saying I agree that raisins are not the kind of food one person should just spring on another. But couldn't you smell the difference?

 

EDIT TO SELF: or were they packaged?

 

DOUBLE EDIT TO SELF: Of course cookies for sale at a store were packaged. Damn it, Lindy ...

 

 

That's why you only get Oatmeal is with butterscotch. I haven't seen anyone tri to combine raisins with those.

I'm full of controversy today, so I'll just say it: I hate butterscotch.

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Please don't think I'm impugning the legitimacy of your past trauma. I'm on record as saying I agree that raisins are not the kind of food one person should just spring on another. But couldn't you smell the difference?

 

EDIT TO SELF: or were they packaged?

 

DOUBLE EDIT TO SELF: Of course cookies for sale at a store were packaged. Damn it, Lindy ...

 

 

I'm full of controversy today, so I'll just say it: I hate butterscotch.

Better question: Why are you going around smelling baked goods before you have purchased them? Are you one of those people I have nightmares about doing gross things to the food I buy at the grocery store?

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Better question: Why are you going around smelling baked goods before you have purchased them? Are you one of those people I have nightmares about doing gross things to the food I buy at the grocery store?

I use all five senses when perusing baked goods. Maybe that's why my cookie identification game is on-fucking-point.

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I'm full of controversy today, so I'll just say it: I hate butterscotch.

 

Butterscotch is the best

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....ok, I realize it is perfectly reasonable to smell baked goods in a bakery because those sugary treats and doughy delicacies no doubt smell scrumptious, it's just that I got an image in my head of someone picking up and smelling an entire batch of cookies with deliberate intensity and determination, trying to discern the ingredients contained therein.

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I use all five senses when perusing baked goods. Maybe that's why my cookie identification game is on-fucking-point.

It's probably really easy if you're using the sense of taste.

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Ok, NOW we're suggesting you go around eating baked goods at a bakery or a grocery store to check the ingredients before purchase? Now THIS, dear sirs and madams, is a bridge too far! Impropriety!

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Ok, NOW we're suggesting you go around eating baked goods at a bakery or a grocery store to check the ingredients before purchase? Now THIS, dear sirs and madams, is a bridge to far! Impropriety!

I'll not have lip from anyone who goes about sniffing quasars, thank you.

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OMG Zouks was on The Good Place? I've been waiting for this.

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OMG. Zouks just popped up on THE GOOD PLACE. I guess this is why they had Rosa dump him on B99?

 

Honestly I didn't think The Good Place could get better for me. I was wrong. Let's get D'Arcy back on the podcast now.

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Let's get D'Arcy back on the podcast now.

I second this. I'm kinda maybe a lot in love with her.

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I second this. I'm kinda maybe a lot in love with her.

I love when they give her a variation on Janet on The Good Place. She's getting to show off so much comedic range.

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