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Episode 24 — Superman III LIVE!

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This week we bring you How Did This Get Made? LIVE from Largo at the Coronet in Los Angeles! Special guest Damon Lindelof joined us for this amazing night of awkward credits, poor storytelling, and bad direction. The night was so amazing that we're releasing it in twoseparateinstallments! Come back next week to hear the rest of the show with yet another special guest. Thanks to Liezl Estipona who took the amazing photos of the event you see on Earwolf. You can, and should, find her photography bookLiezl Was Hereon Blurb.

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Awesome episode! I can't wait to hear next week's installment. Love it when you guys have people related to the projects on.

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Superman Returns would have been so much better if Superman's bastard son was the fruit of the union between him and the blonde from Superman III. That would actually have given Lois a reason to leave him other than "Oh, you were in space. Sorry."

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To be fair, wasn't there a sex scene in Superman II? Superman woos Lois back at his ice castle and he decides to give up his powers to "make love" to her. They wake up under aluminum foil blankets. Right? Did that happen? or was it a weirdly erotic dream I had?

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This movie came out at a time when I trusted brands. It wasn't even about "Is Superman III a good movie," it was about, "Hey, it's another Superman movie! Awesome! Why is he doing that to the tower of Pisa? Doesn't matter! I wish he'd come to my bowling alley birthday party!"

I was SHOCKED watching this movie as an adult. Those opening credits are crazy!

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I googled "superman iii opening credits" but was unsuccessful in finding the scene they talk about here. Could someone point me in the right direction?

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Main credits sequence on youtube -

Such a hilarious episode! I subscribed to this podcast on a whim yesterday and I'm now working my way through all the episodes! Just added Battlefield Earth on Netflix so I can fully enjoy the episode later tonight! Wheee!

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I'd like to point out that the not-so-dumb blonde girlfriend in Superman III is Pamela Stephenson, fairly notable for several reasons. In possibly descending order of importance:
1) She was a big star in late 70s, early 80s in the comedy show 'Not the Nine O Clock News', which launched several careers including Rowan Atkinson. She was very funny in it - check out clips on Youtube.
2) She's been married to Billy Connelly the past 30 years
3) She's a qualified clinical psychologist
4) She's a sex columnist for the Guardian newspaper.
5) In 2010 she came third in Strictly Come Dancing, the show America turned into Dancing with the Stars (with most of the same judges).
6) She's now in her early sixties and still really looks great

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I could have SWORN I watched Superman III on TV around 15 years ago (first time) and I just don't remember it being this freaking BAD! I'll have to catch it the next time it's shown, if ever. This episode makes me want to see the original again. Christopher Reeve WAS Superman.
Andrew, thanks for the info on Pamela Stephenson. Sounds like she's a very accomplished woman. I'll look her up on YT.

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@Heather Mayer: I don't think that was the opening sequence everyone is talking about. The third movie broke with the first two by having this crazy slapstick-y sequence, Instead of having the opening credits roll over space like the first two. Certain later versions (like the TV version) changed the opening credits to the "in space" version that you see here. (At least, that's how I understand it. I haven't seen this movie since I was a kid, so I don't remember the ridiculous intro they are talking about.)

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Yes Superman 3 is totally dumb and clearly was a mismatch for the kid audience. But I think that truly crappy films are filled with baaaad acting. They can't sell the stuff they are trying to peddle. I don't feel that about Superman 3 - the plot is ludicrous and directing ridiculous, but Christopher Reeves is creepy as rapey Superman, right? Or have I read too many 5 star Amazon reviews? I don't know, I was hoping for a more outrageously bad-on-many-levels film for the first LIVE show.

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Amaaaaaazing episode. Damon should be on the show more often! He fit right in.

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As a kid, I didn't really realize how shitty Superman III was, but I do remember being a little confused by it. But when I saw it again years later, and saw Richard fucking Prior skiing off a skyscraper, I remember thinking, WTF. This was the funniest episode yet to me, and maybe the live audience helped.

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Yeah Superman III was an experience i recall being confused by it after enjoying the first two to a reasonable degree... but as an adult you really get to appreciate the bizzareness of it all. I do recall the rapey Superman bits being particularly confusing and not at all what I wanted from a one dimensional, inspirational and a relentless embodiment of ethics that is Superman.

 

And yeah.. poor Pamela Stephenson.. she came off badly in an incredibly stupid role.. Sexy in an 80's poodle perm way and then reduced to tinfoil covered buffoonery.

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I'm a new listener to HDTGM, and have caught up on all the episodes currently available on iTunes. Thanks for making this fun show for us Paul, June, Jason and intern ^_^

 

I really loved the review of Superman III. I saw this as a kid and had no recollection of how bug-eating insane it is.

 

I especially enjoy the episodes in which a person somehow connected to the production can share their insights. Jack O'Halloran was interesting for that reason. But - was this just me or did he come across as a name-dropping, bragging, hooligan with delusions of grandeur? Despite this, he seemed affable enough. Odd that.

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Is this mostly indicative of the other podcasts? 60+ minutes of obvious and uninsightful commentary mocking silly or shaky film logic? Perhaps it's due to being in front of a live audience where the hosts/guests feel the need to "perform" and turn everything they say into some sort of joke to constantly goad their audience for applause, but this got old very quickly.

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A couple of things about this episode.

 

Not only does Michael Bolton reference Superman 3 when proposing the plan to rob Initech, he actually says the line "They did it in Superman 3... a great movie, actually."

 

Additionally, the fire scene with the five-mile-away lake is incredible. Here goes:

5 miles is 5 mi / ft * 5280 ft = 26400 ft

Running at a speedy 12 mph, firefighters would take 25 minutes to drag their 26,400 foot hose (which would weigh an insane amount and be impossible not to catch on innumerable obstacles) to the lake. The water would then, if flowing at the speed of gravity (it wouldn't), take 26,400 ft / 32.2 ft / sec = 819.9 sec = 13.7 min to arrive at the fire. So, 39 minutes to get the water to the truck after realizing they had run out, even if the firefighters did bring the 26,400 foot hose. That building would be a smoldering pile by then.

 

Fuck you, David and Leslie Nelson, co-writers of Superman 3, for your inept math and planning. Fuck you.

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i had listened to this episode (possibly twice) before i decided that i needed to watch this movie.

 

yowza. i must say, i really did enjoy it. i really recommend it and i can't stop talking to my friends about it. richard pryor skiing off a skyscraper!!! native wedding!!! brad!!!

 

i think you are overthinking the lake math, though. first, they probably wouldn't run to the lake, they would probably drive a truck to the lake that was connected by hose to the main truck, and then pump it between the trucks (i'm sure the hose wouldn't get snagged en route). so it would also flow faster than gravity i assume. still it is somewhat unrealistic, that's why the superman frozen lake layer trick is the ideal solution.

 

but i do want to talk about the stupid-smart chick, though. what was her deal? so she was secretly smart, but it never went anywhere. was she a spy? a usurper? WHY was she secretly smart? maybe it was just supposed to be a joke? i thought it was going to pay off in the plot but it never did.

 

man. again, i highly recommend watching this movie at least once. i had never seen it before and was joyfully surprised (even after having most of the plot and premise spoiled by the podcast!)

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but i do want to talk about the stupid-smart chick, though. what was her deal? so she was secretly smart, but it never went anywhere. was she a spy? a usurper? WHY was she secretly smart? maybe it was just supposed to be a joke? i thought it was going to pay off in the plot but it never did.

 

 

I have a feeling it didn't go beyond, 'Isn't it hilarious? She's blonde but she knows stuff!'.

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I have a feeling it didn't go beyond, 'Isn't it hilarious? She's blonde but she knows stuff!'.

 

What a waste of Pamela Stephenson, who was one of the funniest women in comedy at that point. She deserved much better than the dross in Superman III!

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Here's my take on how this movie got to be so horribly convoluted and stupid.

 

Richard Lester the director of this was riding high on his success of Superman 2, his wild fantasies of creating a zany comedy were running wild in his head and felt like he needed to top specifically the comedy of Superman 2 going from silly and kinda fun to absurd and stupid. I bet the guy was a fan of the 3 stooges and slapstick in general. Anyway it seemed like Lester was determined to make it his movie regardless of any effort the screenwriters put into the screenplay to make it even remotely resemble the comic book version.

 

I'm betting that the writers kinda tried to loosely use stories or at least ideas from the comic plots based on the rumors I've heard about it originally being a Brainiac story and Mr Myxtlypx ( sorry, spelling) but Lester just wanted to do a wacky cartoon esque comedy. I can see his logic being that comicbooks are for kids thus they are like cartoons so they need to be full of cheap 1 off gags and stunts ala Wiley Coyote.

 

So instead of working with what the writers gave him, he chose to work around it and just kinda have it filling in the gaps in between jokes.

 

I don't know if Lester was involved in the casting but if he was I bet his mindset was" Who is the funniest most popular comedian right now that we can afford to star in this?" and "who cares if he can even act, the lines are just laughing fodder." So instead of incorporating actual Superman villains and exploring their character he just basically replaced them with boring stereotyped no name antagonists and said to hell with their backstory. So we not only have these villains whose motivations make no sense, we also have a premise that is devoid of purpose and meaning.

 

So instead of asking for a rewrite of the script to include his version of the characters Lester instead chose to just keep those plot lines even though they now make no sense and continue with his agenda of on screen shenanigans.

 

It seems like Lester didnt know and worse didnt give a damn about who Superman is, what he's capable of or even featuring him in the movie, Superman was just his gimmick with which to sell his weird comedy despite it containing dark adult themes from the original drafts. It's ironic that there was 2 version of Superman in this movie because it's almost like 2 completely seperate movies 1. an oddball comedy about city life 2. A dark Superman tragedy.

 

Thus we have the worst Super hero movie of all time. (excluding maybe Howard the Duck)

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