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Episode 190 - Hurricane Heist: LIVE!


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#41 grudlian.

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 04:51 AM

It gets brought up a couple times that How Did This Get Made is affecting the numbers for Hurricane Heist. They also bring up the power of HDTGM and its listeners with Face/Off. So, this got me curious how much money is How Did This Get Made bringing in for The Hurricane Heist. Let's do some math.

I looked at the seating chart for the Athenaeum. A quick count puts it at 1012 seats. It cost $14.99 to buy this movie. That's 15169.88.

To my knowledge, Earwolf doesn't publish numbers but here is a thread on reddit looking at some numbers based on Soundcloud downloads. These are certainly very lowball numbers because its 1. two years ago and 2. it doesn't include listens from other sources like Stitcher, Howl, etc. But let's just go with 343238 for average listens (subtracting live show attendees for this episode). Multiply that times the $5.99 to rent on Amazon, that's $2,055,955.62. We're looking at a total of $2,071,165.50.

From this point on, I'm going to have to do a ton of speculating. We know a ton of listeners never pay money to see the movie. They just don't watch it. They watch it in groups. They share Amazon passwords. They pirate the movie. I'll pull a number totally out of my ass and say 50% never pay money for Hurricane Heist. That still puts us at $1,035,582.75.

The lifetime box office gross of Hurricane Heist is $6,115,825. So, HDTGM conservatively brought in 16% of Hurricane Heist's gross in two weeks. That's pretty impressive and I'm sure one of those 29 producers is probably getting a paycheck thinking "Maybe we should have kept this in theatres a second week! It's doing okay on VOD."

#42 The Triple Lindy

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 05:35 AM

View Postcruel intestines, on 08 June 2018 - 04:56 PM, said:

i haven't listened to this episode yet (i've recently succumbed to watching the extremely heterosexual nonsense that is Love Island and I'm so obsessed I can't do anything else), but I watched this a couple of weeks ago in a weather / robbery double bill with Hard Rain and I'm only slightly embarrassed to say that I genuinely had a great, great time watching this movie. I was just gleefully texting my pal about everything ridiculous happening and was screaming with laughter so much at the scene in the mall that I actually had to pause the movie until I calmed down. It's very silly and bad but I really thought it was a lot of fun.

In a similar coincidence, I just watched Masterminds, which is "based on a true story" about an armored truck driver pulling an inside job to steal $14B (it's not great, but it's good for a couple of laughs). And then I started playing Mafia III, and the first mission involves posing as armored truck drivers to steal a bunch of currency meant for decirculation and destruction. I guess now I should watch Hard Rain and, I guess, maybe Point Break, too.

View PostRyan Sz, on 08 June 2018 - 05:18 PM, said:

Also when did the hacker couple start helping out the good guys, by the end of this movie I was skipping forward a bit and had no idea why the leads were trying to pull them from the truck they were driving.

It wasn't until that very moment that Studio 54 hacker-bandits started helping. Until then, they were huddled behind the seat nursing the British guy's gunshot wound.

But that does lead to a quick point: Will and Breeze climb in to takeover the truck, subdue the bad guys (who are dry humping in the driver's seat) and take their gun, and then Will immediately climbs back out to takeover the second truck, leaving Breeze alone in the driver's seat with two bad guys behind them, who we've just seen were armed. Hurt or not, why wouldn't the two baddies try to overpower Breeze after they regained composure? How is there only one gun between them -- don't we see everyone with guns earlier in the movie?

#43 The Triple Lindy

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 05:48 AM

Let's make a list of all the ways this movie rips of Twister:

- child who sees father killed in storm becomes storm-chasing expert
- fancy weather-chasing super-trucks
- tethered bodies flying up into the storm yet sustaining no damage from debris
- treating weather like people
- "We've never seen a storm like this"
- convoys
- storms only effect small town America
- hubris
- love triangle -- Paxton/Hunt/Gertz v. the inevitable survival euphoria menage a trois that Will/Breeze/Casey are gonna have at some Red Roof in Pensacola.

#44 gigitastic

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 06:25 AM

View Postomaxem, on 08 June 2018 - 09:43 AM, said:


High praise there from June. This should henceforth be featured in the promotional material for the film ( i can totally see it in the poster )


I need a list like the AFI Top 100. "The June's" or "Recognized by June Diane Raphael "

OR it be like the Canne film award The June's with fancy little palm fronds around it. Please someone with skills make up a coveted June Award symbol for this movie poster.

#45 gigitastic

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 06:39 AM

View PostRyan Sz, on 08 June 2018 - 05:18 PM, said:

I will say that Bautista is really good in Hotel Artemis, albeit with a horrible Mexican accent, but I couldn't imagine him getting any bigger than his peak WWE days, but somehow he ate his former self because he is gigantic in this movie.


Like Den of Thieves being a near copy of of Heat, this film is a copy of Hard Rain, right down to basically nearly every character but the leads becoming bad guys, and then turning on each other.


I assume they are raised by the hurricane, it's why Will knows so much about them, and I assume Breeze was influenced to serve in the military after witnessing Operation Desert Storm.

Also when did the hacker couple start helping out the good guys, by the end of this movie I was skipping forward a bit and had no idea why the leads were trying to pull them from the truck they were driving. Lastly, the fans of this film are like that of Deep Blue Sea, as many of the positive reviews I read had the phrase "fuck you Geostorm."


WHAT IF THE HURRICANE IS THEIR MOTHER?! Clearly Hurricane Mom and their father were going through a NASTY divorce and she just snapped. OR he had stolen their children from their Stormland Dreamhouse (I assume somewhere in Florida because where else would someone be fucked up enough to have two children with a hurricane ) moved to this shitty small town to hide from her and raise his children as best he can. He prays that by forcing them to become obsessed with mundane human thing like football they will inherit his humanity and will never become the StormGods they were meant to be. They fled Hurricane Mom when the children were mere tots and so the older one is the only one who really has any pull towards the weather so he becomes a meteorologist (much to his dead fathers horror I am sure). And as you mentioned it's why Breeze is affected by Operation Desert Storm to go to Afghanistan (also maybe because subconsciously he knows there's no way a hurricane can get to him there. )

However when the two find themselves stuck in another hurricane OF COURSE their mother is gong to do what any mother would! She is going to make sure her boys are looked after! She's even nice enough to not hurt that new Lady Friend (who could become more if she nudges them in the right direction? Mom was trying to play match maker!) of her son's! Honestly the real hero of this movie is Hurricane Mom

#46 gigitastic

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 06:42 AM

View Postgrudlian., on 09 June 2018 - 04:51 AM, said:

It gets brought up a couple times that How Did This Get Made is affecting the numbers for Hurricane Heist. They also bring up the power of HDTGM and its listeners with Face/Off. So, this got me curious how much money is How Did This Get Made bringing in for The Hurricane Heist. Let's do some math.

I looked at the seating chart for the Athenaeum. A quick count puts it at 1012 seats. It cost $14.99 to buy this movie. That's 15169.88.

To my knowledge, Earwolf doesn't publish numbers but here is a thread on reddit looking at some numbers based on Soundcloud downloads. These are certainly very lowball numbers because its 1. two years ago and 2. it doesn't include listens from other sources like Stitcher, Howl, etc. But let's just go with 343238 for average listens (subtracting live show attendees for this episode). Multiply that times the $5.99 to rent on Amazon, that's $2,055,955.62. We're looking at a total of $2,071,165.50.

From this point on, I'm going to have to do a ton of speculating. We know a ton of listeners never pay money to see the movie. They just don't watch it. They watch it in groups. They share Amazon passwords. They pirate the movie. I'll pull a number totally out of my ass and say 50% never pay money for Hurricane Heist. That still puts us at $1,035,582.75.

The lifetime box office gross of Hurricane Heist is $6,115,825. So, HDTGM conservatively brought in 16% of Hurricane Heist's gross in two weeks. That's pretty impressive and I'm sure one of those 29 producers is probably getting a paycheck thinking "Maybe we should have kept this in theatres a second week! It's doing okay on VOD."


I mean I was at the show and I DEF did not actually buy this garbage movie. I probably have 1,000 new viruses on my computer but there was no way I was paying for this.

#47 Sirus Moran

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 06:55 AM

The money is going to be shredded by the US Treasury.
Serial numbers on bank notes don't get reused.
The US Treasury is more than likely to keep a record of all bank notes that they destroy.

... all the money that is being stolen therefor has all of their serial numbers on record being at the same place and time. They wanted to steal traceable money?

#48 The Triple Lindy

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 07:14 AM

View PostSirus Moran, on 09 June 2018 - 06:55 AM, said:

The money is going to be shredded by the US Treasury.
Serial numbers on bank notes don't get reused.
The US Treasury is more than likely to keep a record of all bank notes that they destroy.

... all the money that is being stolen therefor has all of their serial numbers on record being at the same place and time. They wanted to steal traceable money?

Yeah, but businesses won't know the difference when you pay in cash, right?
Spoiler


#49 grudlian.

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 08:21 AM

View PostThe Triple Lindy, on 09 June 2018 - 07:14 AM, said:

Yeah, but businesses won't know the difference when you pay in cash, right?
Spoiler


This is what I'm thinking. This money will pass every counterfeit test because it's not counterfeit. A store isn't going to bother checking a bill against a database of stolen serial numbers. But what about banks? Would the Treasury Department or Mint give banks a database to track incoming money? Can the treasury track where the currency the destroy comes from (I suspect they can but don't know)?

If the treasury can track incoming bills to be destroyed, then you're probably screwed. They would eventually realize they are getting a lot of bills from a specific region. Then narrow it to a specific state or city. Down to a bank or branch. Figure out the armored car delivery and where they pick up cash from. If you start seeing lots of bills from specific stores, you just get feds to hang out there until the robbers come back once you've figured out a general spending pattern. It also helps that these criminals are certainly on camera the entire time they are robbing the treasury.

You could probably bypass a lot of this by living a mildly nomadic lifestyle. If you travel the country, it's going to be much harder for them to get an idea on where you're spending your money next. And I assume there's a time delay on when the Treasury could even track the money of a few days if not weeks or longer. So, you might be good there but, again, you're probably super famous right now. You're picture from the robbery is everywhere and the news is going to tell everyone to watch for people spending cash for every purchase.

You could put your money in a bank, but a bank is going to question opening a new account and depositing tons of cash. I'm sure that gets checked and I'm sure the treasury is going to be interested especially after they got robbed. So, banks are definitely out for a while if not forever unless you're depositing small amounts over a long period of time.

So, I think this is definitely plausible to get away with it and live a life. I think it would be a weird, tedious life where you probably couldn't spend tons of money on large ticket items that draw attention to themselves with large cash purchases. Who steals $600 million without wanting to splurge a little bit?

#50 IronMaiden4892

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 08:32 AM

I really thought the opening was setting up a twist where the robbers were the ones causing hurricanes so that they could rob places and the skull was their logo, like when the death eaters attack the quidditch world cup. Until I realized the guy with the drones was the grown up little brother, I thought he was releasing the drones that caused the storm. This is the most June I have ever felt!

#51 The Triple Lindy

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 08:33 AM

View Postgrudlian., on 09 June 2018 - 08:21 AM, said:

This is what I'm thinking. This money will pass every counterfeit test because it's not counterfeit. A store isn't going to bother checking a bill against a database of stolen serial numbers. But what about banks? Would the Treasury Department or Mint give banks a database to track incoming money? Can the treasury track where the currency the destroy comes from (I suspect they can but don't know)?

If the treasury can track incoming bills to be destroyed, then you're probably screwed. They would eventually realize they are getting a lot of bills from a specific region. Then narrow it to a specific state or city. Down to a bank or branch. Figure out the armored car delivery and where they pick up cash from. If you start seeing lots of bills from specific stores, you just get feds to hang out there until the robbers come back once you've figured out a general spending pattern. It also helps that these criminals are certainly on camera the entire time they are robbing the treasury.

You could probably bypass a lot of this by living a mildly nomadic lifestyle. If you travel the country, it's going to be much harder for them to get an idea on where you're spending your money next. And I assume there's a time delay on when the Treasury could even track the money of a few days if not weeks or longer. So, you might be good there but, again, you're probably super famous right now. You're picture from the robbery is everywhere and the news is going to tell everyone to watch for people spending cash for every purchase.

You could put your money in a bank, but a bank is going to question opening a new account and depositing tons of cash. I'm sure that gets checked and I'm sure the treasury is going to be interested especially after they got robbed. So, banks are definitely out for a while if not forever unless you're depositing small amounts over a long period of time.

So, I think this is definitely plausible to get away with it and live a life. I think it would be a weird, tedious life where you probably couldn't spend tons of money on large ticket items that draw attention to themselves with large cash purchases. Who steals $600 million without wanting to splurge a little bit?

So then, the plan is ... get a cashier's check, buy a boat, head south, live like two kings and a queen in ... Cuba? Zihuatanejo? Where in Central/South America would be the best place to live out life on the lamb?

#52 The Triple Lindy

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 08:35 AM

I just re-watched the movie (WHY?!?) and did anyone else catch Will's line about how they hope to be able to mitigate and maybe even outright prevent hurricanes through their study?

Uh, by my recollection, that's EXACTLY how you get Geostorms.

#53 gigitastic

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 09:22 AM

View PostThe Triple Lindy, on 09 June 2018 - 08:35 AM, said:

I just re-watched the movie (WHY?!?) and did anyone else catch Will's line about how they hope to be able to mitigate and maybe even outright prevent hurricanes through their study?

Uh, by my recollection, that's EXACTLY how you get Geostorms.


Will is the Creator of Geostorms!

#54 gigitastic

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 09:23 AM

View PostThe Triple Lindy, on 09 June 2018 - 08:35 AM, said:

I just re-watched the movie (WHY?!?) and did anyone else catch Will's line about how they hope to be able to mitigate and maybe even outright prevent hurricanes through their study?

Uh, by my recollection, that's EXACTLY how you get Geostorms.

Will is the Creator of Geostorm! They use all that money to build the first Geostorm machine

#55 joel_rosenbaum

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 11:24 AM

View PostThe Triple Lindy, on 08 June 2018 - 09:26 AM, said:

I was an all-county basketball player, so I got a taste of that kind of local privilege. But I also hated high school and most of the people in my town, so I got out and beyond it as soon as I was able. I think you sorta have to hate high school in order to move beyond it ... if your high school experience was too good, then you can be crippled by it.


"In high school there’s generally one acceptable way to be, and it’s dictated by the exigencies of dating. There are the people who try to be that way, and then there are the other, clunky, disastrously uncool individuals, the nerds, who swim upstream in those waters.
...
Real Life is actually a lot more like high school. The common denominator prevails. Excellence is not always recognized or rewarded. What we watch on our screens, whom we elect, are determined to a large extent by public polls. Looks count. A lot. And unlike the best of the college experience, when ideas and solutions somehow seem attainable if you just get up early, stay up late, try hard enough, and find the right source or method, things on the outside sometimes seem vast and impossible, and settling, resigning oneself, or hiding and hunkering down becomes the best way of getting along."

#56 joel_rosenbaum

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 11:34 AM

View Postgrudlian., on 09 June 2018 - 08:21 AM, said:

So, I think this is definitely plausible to get away with it and live a life. I think it would be a weird, tedious life where you probably couldn't spend tons of money on large ticket items that draw attention to themselves with large cash purchases. Who steals $600 million without wanting to splurge a little bit?
You need one of these

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#57 Ryan Sz

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 02:09 PM

View PostHowibetyourmother, on 09 June 2018 - 04:12 AM, said:

BTW, is Paul still salty about that hdtgm.com that some a-hole is siting on? His Ben & Jerry's commercial spot seems to indicate so

They could have gone the route and bought every domain iteration to cover their bases, but then they'd probably end up like Toys R Us which owned HUNDREDS of domains with "R Us" in the name, eventually adding fuel to the bankruptcy fire.
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#58 Ryan Sz

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 02:35 PM

View PostSirus Moran, on 09 June 2018 - 06:55 AM, said:

The money is going to be shredded by the US Treasury.
Serial numbers on bank notes don't get reused.
The US Treasury is more than likely to keep a record of all bank notes that they destroy.

... all the money that is being stolen therefor has all of their serial numbers on record being at the same place and time. They wanted to steal traceable money?

This is literally the plot of Den of Thieves. The gang of crooks are robbing the Treasury of $30 million in bills that are going to be shredded, because their serial numbers ARE being deleted from the Treasury records. I did some research and it's vague at best about how serial numbers are changed over the years but they can include letters and even star symbols so it's plausible enough to get away with $30 million and not be found out for a lengthy period of time, $600 million on the other hand would be rather difficult to get out clean.
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#59 grudlian.

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 02:51 PM

View Postjoel_rosenbaum, on 09 June 2018 - 11:34 AM, said:

You need one of these

Posted Image

I thought about this but I only understand money laundering in theory. Wouldn't the money launderer run into the same problems if the bills can be tracked at all? Couldn't the treasury find the source of the bills the same way I speculated but now through the business fronts the launderer uses? I guess that's the money launderers problem but they could certainly flip on you.

#60 PollyDarton

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Posted 09 June 2018 - 05:39 PM

View Postgrudlian., on 09 June 2018 - 02:51 PM, said:

I thought about this but I only understand money laundering in theory. Wouldn't the money launderer run into the same problems if the bills can be tracked at all? Couldn't the treasury find the source of the bills the same way I speculated but now through the business fronts the launderer uses? I guess that's the money launderers problem but they could certainly flip on you.


The actual money itself is a factor that doesn't really change. Money laundering is about creating a plausible method to legitimately earn the cash. It is explained really well in Breaking Bad if you ever saw it. Walt's wife Skylar buys a carwash and runs the business like usual, but at the end of the day she secretly upsells all the car washes to waxes and deluxe services and then deposits their illicit cash with the money they legitimately earned from the business... slowly funneling in their meth money making it clean so to speak. It looks totally legit from the outside.

It seems to me they would have to go to the gulf, buy a big boat with their cash and sail out to south america with as much of it as they could. There's a good chance that money would still work in another country but all in very under the table kinds of ways... but that's possibly a weird assumption?

It is also possible to try a few schemes like opening bank accounts with it, then immediately turning around and closing their account and getting a cashier's check (someone may have said this already) and then turning around and getting FRESH cash for that check... but I imagine you can only do that so many times before you get caught.