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*shoots Juicy Melon Jim in the face with silenced machine pistol* Bonjour, I am Pierre and I'm your new bus driver.

 

 

Bumping this because for some reason out of the blue I started thinking about this movie.

 

It basically has the lamest villains where the main physical threat comes from a 70 year old woman who uses her necklace as a weapon.

 

An assassin prostitute who is thwarted by stooge level bumbling on the part of our hero trying to get condoms out of a Pringles can and she takes a rocket to the face.

 

Massive coincidence upon massive coincidence which propel our hero onwards through the story. (and his raging bone for the europy chick he is kinda teamed with.)

 

Bond reject gadgets, like suction cup sneakers (which they completely redesigned basically in a half hour because they were like loafers before).

 

Reluctant hero who basically tries to just steal the high tech spy car until he's finally dragged into the plot. (does the car ever come into play other than briefly once when he's accidentally shooting missiles at things when he's trying to roll the windows down?). Also, it's a car which normally doesn't have much extra space, and any space it would have had would be filled by missiles and pneumatic whatsits after being turned into a spy-mobile...so how did it have 4 spare tires in it?

 

This is basically a lamer, less funny, less thought out and coherent version of Bill Murray's "The Man Who Knew Too Little" (or that's a funnier more coherent version of this, since it came out later, whatever)

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YES!! I want to see this again, but the problem is availability. I can't find it in stores nor on netflix streaming or itunes..

 

I agree it should be done because it is an 80s teen version of James Bond (other than James Bond Jr.) and is kinda far fetched. It was silly and stupid. But again they like to do ones you can actually see. I don't see this ever happening.

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I Fucking love this movie!!! It's so bad and do cheesy that It's a definitive must watch. I was able yo buy a copy but only through the Warner shop from their movie archive. You have to order it special made though. I would definitely order and send HDTGM a copy if they wanted to. It's that good.

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This does look bad. I remember seeing this as one of films on HBO but never watched it. I assumed based on the write up that it was some subpar thriller. But this looks BIZARRE!

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I know this came out in the 90s but I still have to assume the attempt to make Richard Greico happen was fueled by leftover 80s cocaine.

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This movie is like if James Bond Jr was a live action movie, and it is amazing! I desperately want to hear this discussed on HDTGM.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EVBsURJF0yg

 

If Looks Could Kill for your consideration. I couldn't believe no one had suggested this. I don't think Richard Grieco has mad an HDTGM appearance yet. He plays an 18 year old who looks like he's 35 and rocks a varsity jacket and head phones pretty much the entire movie. This movie is perfectly early 90's bad/good.

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I think this movie just needs to get done. If only for closure.

 

I did see this movie and remember maybe about 3% of it; must have been awesome, though.

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I remember even as a heartless teenage boy being shocked by Grieco's transition from head-bobbing high school student to bullet-spraying spy; and how this was supposed to be funny? When we get into the climax, he doesn't even take a beat before he starts gunning down stunt randos. He's like "welp, I guess it's mass murder time. Wokka wokka."

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As delightful as this is i'm going to have to insist that if they start doing terrible Richard Grieco movies they start with his knockoff Thor movie. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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YES! If Looks Could Kill is the greatest. Soon I'll have to start a podcast called How Has How Did This Get Made Not Done This Yet? And this will be the first episode.

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Guess no one believes me lol but I'll say it again, this is one would be a fun HDTGM show.  Such a crazy silly movie that had a full on box office launch n everything.

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I saw this as a kid (probably too young), but I must admit I still knew in the back of my head that this would not be a movie to seek out and show to other people as thought it were a good movie. I plan on rewatching it though to see how much the rose colored glasses of childhood have affected my memory.

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Yeah it’s been a long time since I last watched it but even then I knew it was a pretty whacky gnarly flick. I feel it’s ripe for HDTGM since it was a legit box office movie. Plus it has the French teacher lol.

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