I'm uncertain about the wording for the Bartho Shett lines, but I'm pretty sure everything else in Patton's Nerd Poker ballad is right. Corrections are welcome.
Under the hills of heroes,
Beneath the world of sun,
There roared the voice of fortune,
Of battles lost and won
Few were brave and less were bold
To enter dungeons dark and cold
But those whose swords and wits were keen
Can lick my ass my ass and suck my peen
Fart fart fart fart
Cow clit
Poop
Oh, Blackie Green he sucked my peen with elvish lips so soft
I thought my dwarven sausage had attracted a cumdrunk moth
When Bartho Shett Bore, a dragonborn,
Spread both his buttcheeks on the morn
And by the night was filled with spooge
I fucked his gaily chute
Oh paint your ballsack blue, boy, and drink a keg of ale
Piss on the door and punch a whore and shit in a pail
Milfred was a warrior stout but dumb as a goblin’s fart
She tried to fuck an umber hulk his pincers made her shart
And Amoth raised his mighty sword and bellowed a warrior’s cry
His war god thought it was a queef and jerked off in his eye
Finally in the ass of hell the soul of a priest so fair
Was dipped in a bucket of zombie cum and ass-raped by a bear
Oh take a flagon of dragon piss
Stir it with your cock
Jizz in a blizzard of wizard’s gizards,
Fuck a plate of beans.
