Reasons for suicide: Lifelong fan of Thelma and Louise but cannot find self a "Thelma" or "Louise"; will drive into Grand Canyon alone. Completed 500+ puzzle Master Sudoku book and am unable to take Sudoku Mastery any further. Discovered my spirit animal was a Carolina Nighthawk, but am diagnosed an ornithophobe. There is no footware corrective enough for my needs. The wind seemed dismissive of me as I welcomed its cooling embrace. Lifetime ban from Chili's.