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Auden

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Everything posted by Auden

  1. Auden

    EPISODE 118.5 - MINISODE 118.5

    If the Bic pen empire heir, Ric Bic, isn't too busy running for president and overcoming his predilection for public masturbation, maybe he could come on the show and give us some info.
  2. Auden

    EPISODE 118.5 - MINISODE 118.5

    I'm not all that familiar with Star Wars. Seeing how Taylor Anne and Fister Roboto both liked the post, I'm guessing that people like the ewoks because they look like teddy bears and people dislike ewoks for that reason as well. Oh! You can get matching cutting tattoo with Jason and Scott Aukerman. Just finished Maximum Overdrive. *H.R. Giger groan*
  3. Auden

    EPISODE 118.5 - MINISODE 118.5

    Thanks! I'd forgotten about Darkness Falls. Ah yes. Renner decided to go the "I'm sorry you were offended" route.
  4. Auden

    EPISODE 118.5 - MINISODE 118.5

    Hey guys, I hope it's ok to ask here. I'm looking for movies where people's survival is dependent on light. The only ones I know are Pitch Black, 30 Days of Night, Darkness, and Vanishing on 7th Street. Please give me suggestions!
  5. Auden

    EPISODE 118.5 - MINISODE 118.5

    Hey! You actually read the article! I agree with what you said about Noah. The way he handled the affair was great. That thing would've blown over quicker had Patton Oswalt not come to his "defence".
  6. Auden

    EPISODE 118.5 - MINISODE 118.5

    For the most part I'm capable of separating art from the artist. I still plan on watching Captain America: Civil War even though both Jeremy Renner and Chris Evans called the Black Widow a slut. I still think Patton Oswalt can be funny. I just meant that I'm not going to actively seek out his stuff anymore. I only have so much time and energy and there are so much media to consume. But if a friend wants me to check out an Oswalt clip or something, I'm certainly not going to object.
  7. Auden

    EPISODE 118.5 - MINISODE 118.5

    In between discovering a slew of amazing comedians on Earwolf and Patton Oswalt's various condescensions, I'm kinda over him.
  8. Auden

    EPISODE 118.5 - MINISODE 118.5

    I swear I was gonna post about how quippy Whedon's dialogues are and how they don't resemble normal human speech before I'd read your post. Whedon's dialogues are nails scratching down the chalkboard of my brain. They are so smug and wink-y. And yes, full of quips. You know how writers usually write dialogues in service of plot and characters? It's as if Whedon's goals are to fill up the quotes page on IMDB and to generate content for Tumblr and Buzzfeed . I think the Black Widow/Hulk relationship is icky too. Something about Black Widow's Hulk whispering. I hate most of Whedon's stuff. There's always something really gross about the way his female characters are written. I actually like Alien: Resurrection a lot. We get to see more alien behavior (e.g. killing one of their own to escape) and we also see aliens underwater. And this is one of the most chilling scenes I've seen. Ripley's characterization sucked in A:R though. I blame Whedon. Genevieve Valentine, in a comment of her great review of A:R, described the movie as "overtly maternal and gendered." Even early in Whedon's career he likes to foist issues of pregnancy on female characters. Watching AoU it struck me that the dialogue, in addition to being annoying as fuck, also sounded really dated. There was a time it seems that everyone tried to write like Whedon, but people have thankfully moved on. Hopefully the Age of Whedon is over. I can't imagine studios would want to work with Whedon anymore what with his track record of badmouthing them. And if that means more opportunites for new-ish movie directors like Scott Derrickson, whose only notable work is the quite good Sinister, then even better.
  9. Auden

    EPISODE 118.5 - MINISODE 118.5

    And why have an ancient god call Black Widow a gendered insult (it's so vile that I refuse to type it out) in The Avengers? Anyway, there's nothing I want to say about Joss Whedon that hasn't already been said by josswhedonisnotafeminist.tumblr.com. Jason and a bunch of HDTGM guests weigh in on their favorite Key & Peele sketches.
  10. Auden

    EPISODE 118.5 - MINISODE 118.5

    For some reason I couldn't get into In the Mouth of Madness even though it combined two of my favorite horror tropes: Lovecraftian horror and hospital/insane asylum settings. Fun trivia, in Event Horizon Sam Neill is also insane and covered with marks, and We've Only Just Begun is also used in 1408. Hmm, possible. Paul might also be talking about Sinister. Children were hanged in the movie. But not in Connecticut. I like both The Conjuring and Sinister. Agreed. I don't find the older horror movies scary at all. The less advanced special effects really take me out of the movies. I've not seen Ringu, but The Ring is the movie that scared me the most. And not in a carthatic, fun way, but in a scarring way. I saw it when it came out in 2002. It's been over 10 years and thinking about it still gives me the shudders. I recently saw Noroi: The Curse on YouTube. It's not your typical J-horror movie. It's a mockumentary. There's no gore, but it's scary and creepy. I knew I'd left off something in my list. I love Frailty. Angela Bettis played a May-ish character in an episode of Criminal Minds. Pontypool has been on Netflix for awhile but I've avoided it because the poster is so lurid. But your description piqued my interest. End of the Line sounds interesting as well.
  11. Auden

    Road House Remake!?

    My recast choice for Wade Garrett is Michelle Yeoh. As long as they don't make her say faux-zen shit.
  12. Auden

    EPISODE 118.5 - MINISODE 118.5

    Paul listed his favorite scary movies as Jaws, The Babadook, The Others and then something about kids hanging and Connecticut. I thought he might mean The Haunting in Connecticut but no kids were hanged in that movie. Does anybody know which movie(s) Paul was talking about? Let's list our favorite scary movies too. That's fun, yes? Here are mine. My absolute absolute favorites are: Aliens The Silence of the Lamb The Shining Seven I've watched these movies countless times. The rest of my favorites are: It Follows The Babadook The Descent Lake Mungo Event Horizon The Strangers 30 Days of Night A Tale of Two Sisters ETA: Frailty. h/t Cam Bert.
  13. Auden

    EPISODE 118.5 - MINISODE 118.5

    Time flies when you're having fun!
  14. Auden

    EPISODE 118 - Furious 7: LIVE

    "Are you one of those male bunnies who prefers hrududus to does?"
  15. Auden

    EPISODE 118 - Furious 7: LIVE

    Ooh, great idea, I have one too. Fast Nein. The Family races in Germany, thinking that none of the autobahns has speed limits. They are wrong.
  16. Auden

    EPISODE 118 - Furious 7: LIVE

    Of course they're wearing heels. The characteristics of a good fighter are: strength, speed, agility and sexiness.
  17. Auden

    EPISODE 118 - Furious 7: LIVE

    I love the casual, matter-of-fact way Paul described Elena as looking like June. It's like, my wife is the most beautiful woman and other women are copies of her. I wonder what prompted Paul to ask--seemingly out of nowhere--if there were Fast & Furious fanfiction. The audience member who answered the question is great. Unflappable under Jason's ribbing. Not HDTGM fanfiction, but I like to imagine that June, Paul and Jason live together. June and Paul in the main house and Jason in the mother-in-law cottage.
  18. Auden

    EPISODE 117.5 - Minisode 117.5

    Both taylorannephoto and Cameron H. have gifer madness.
  19. Auden

    EPISODE 117.5 - Minisode 117.5

    I thought of pot too when I saw his age, but I doubt that's it. I know a few pot smokers (I live in Austin after all), and none of them look young for their age. Whoa.
  20. Auden

    EPISODE 117.5 - Minisode 117.5

    Thanks, jarrycanada. Although, I guess, to be fair, none of the Fast & Furious--oh! And another thing! Sometimes the word and in the titles are spelled out and sometimes they are written as ampersand--titles is as confusing as this movie: Five now dog five! Five now dog five!
  21. Auden

    EPISODE 117.5 - Minisode 117.5

    Doug Benson is 51?! He looks like he's in his 30s.
  22. Auden

    EPISODE 117.5 - Minisode 117.5

    Here's the list of movies in the Fast and Furious franchise: The Fast and the Furious 2 Fast 2 Furious The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift Fast & Furious Fast Five Fast & Furious 6 Furious 7 My problem with the titles is that they don't follow any formula. Words from the title of the first movie are randomly inserted and omitted. Numbers are sometimes figures, sometimes words. Just pick a lane! And taken as a whole the titles look like rejected bank passwords. Oh, there is something I do like in Fast Five. The heat between Elena and Hobbs, generated almost entirely by Elena's worshipful doe-eyes. She's totally down for Hobbs picking her tiny body up and having his big muscly way with her. I was disappointed that she ended up being a beard for Dom. I just looked up Elsa Pataky, the actress who plays Elena, she's married to Thor. Haha.
  23. Auden

    EPISODE 117.5 - Minisode 117.5

    Furious 7 isn't available to rent so I rented Fast Five (my God, the inconsistent titling) instead. It was my first The Fast and the Furious movie. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be but it was scarcely better. It was like a 15-year-old boy had written the script. From the fast cars and hot women to the insular view of foreign countries as exotic slums to simplistic ethics math. Stealing = Bad, and Drug Lords = Bad, so Stealing from Drug Lord = Good. Criminal organizations thrive by exploiting depressed communities. They built wealth on the backs of the poor and the disenfranchised. So Dom and his familia essentially stole millions of blood money from the people of Brazil to gamble, buy luxury cars and to not face the consequences of their criminal actions. They are awful. Man, people weren't kidding about homoerotic undertones in the franchise. Here's SNL's parody, The Fast and the Bi-Curious.
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