He was clever as a fox and as sharp as a tack. The car accident really did a number on him.

[He was clever as a fox and as sharp as a tack. The car accident really did a number on him.]

Thankfully he was still as cute as a small piece of plastic used to keep shirts together.

[The arrow had tons of material on flying, piercing, and puncturing, but his jokes weren't landing with his target audience.]

The arrow sadly wasn't sharp enough to realize it.

[Horton hears a Who, but does he hear his son at home? Cryin' all night on the bedroom floor. Yes, elephants are renowned for their excellent hearing.]

He'll bring home some peanuts for the little rascal

[Rubber Ducky your the one, you make....wait where'd you go? Rubber Ducky come down from there! Let's talk this through! Rubs! Noooooo! *Squeak*]

RIP

[Best of 2016 Pt. 4]

By the way......Fat Jew What's Next!

 

Btw, I'd buy this shirt

[Best of 2016 Pt. 4]

By the way......Fat Jew What's Next!

[I narrowly escaped Skull Island's demise, claw marks on my back were my only souvenir. Kong got physical when I refused to wear the sailor suit.]

Just a little insight into my sex life with oversized gorillas.

[Beneath the trees where nobody sees, he'll hide and seek as long as he please. Cause that's the way that Marylin Mason sucks his own prick.]

[In that moment time froze, I looked around at all my friends horrified faces and that's when I realized...I don't have to work on Monday. Wahooo!]

They was icicles

[How many monkeys does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, one to screw in the light bulb and one to eat a banana.]

ok

[The problem with my dick isn't obvious at first, but upon closer inspection it's pretty obvious.]

warts maybe

[Give a fish a fish and it'll become a cannibal. Teach a fish to fish and well, you sir just created a serial killer.]

<==<

[You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink. Unless its Horse from Kappa Delta Phi, he'll drink anything.]

Neigh

[Last night I farted on my roomates. Infantile? Maybe. Guile, from Street Fighter? No.]

That's more of an E. Honda joke.

[Never meet your heroes, the other day I found out Shampoodler was actually Lorne Michaels.]

I guess I can just picture Lorne typing up catchphrases late night at 30 Rock.

[Best of 2016 Pt. 1]

Rest in power was started by the black community. It became a sort of an empowering statement after the unjust killings of Trayvon Martin, Mike Brown, etc. Something to lift up the names in a way.

 

I'm not sure what physically happened, but when Paul told Scott about Rest in Power, Scott sounds like he is briefly on the other side of the room and it was funny for me to imagine him running back to the microphone because he was so appalled. And now that he was accidentally being sort of offensive it might actually be funnier.

[Jingle Bells,Batman Smells,Robin laid an egg. Seriously, we were partying at Selina's and Robin jumps on the table and yells "Let's see a bat do this"]

The batmobile lost a wheel on the way home, we were all too drunk to get the thing back on.

[Episode 463 - 2016 Holiday Spectacular]

 

Oh? I thought All Holidays Matter.

 

You're more of a spinster than that Liberal media.

[Episode 463 - 2016 Holiday Spectacular]

More like 2016 Christmas Spectacular.

[This is not an April Fools Joke, Mayor Menino is dead.]

#regionalhumor

[Black hole sun won't you come, all over my ass.]

.

[I just want to live long enough to see Natalie Merchant become Natalie CEO.]

That's interesting because I just want to live long enough to see Natalie Portman become Natalie Loading Master.

[Hello Muddah, Hello Muddah, Here I am at, Camp Awareness. Camp is very educative, and they told that I need to stop mansplaining.]

.

[I had Thankgiving and I ate lot of Turkey and had to eat Beans also. Thank you for your consideration for the Secretary of Agriculture position.]

asdasd

[Bouncing, rolling, and never slowing, the super wacky amazing bouncy ball killed 6 today in what authorites are calling tragic.]

.