"Gorgonzola!? More like Gorgon Zoloft, Medusa's been moping ever since Anticles walked out on her. But yea crumble that shit all over my greens."

["Gorgonzola!? More like Gorgon Zoloft, Medusa's been moping ever since Anticles walked out on her. But yea crumble that shit all over my greens."]

And get me some wine, it's about to get saucy up in this bitch.

[Necrotizing Fasciitis or "flesh-eating bacertia" first came into the public eye after Peter Hedges gripping exposé, "What's Eating Gilbert Grape".]

The movie version was later released where Johnny Depp was the obvious choice for the role of the bacteria ridden Gilbert.

[I scream, you scream, we all scream because we're watching Scream 3.]

my scream themed submission

[The wheels on the bus went round and round....including the steering wheel...I lost control...late at night, I still hear the children sing.]

Thankfully they sing lullabies. And there's enough of them so at least they don't sound completely terrible.

[When I first got a grip of the grip's big whip, I dared not touch my lips to their strip! Was I ready? Ready to sip? That premature, grip-whip-drip.]

yip

[Orange you glad I didn't say aren't you glad.]

It's more fun this way.

[Episode 444 - Mind Your Please and Questions]

 

Yeah, I think I'm going to need to see the long-form birth certificate of that "ostrich." Many people are saying that this all seems pretty suspicious. Believe me. Sad!

 

Finally good to see some fellow birthers around here.

[Steven Speilberg's dick is so big that it co-wrote Schindler's List.]

This is actually true. Not with Steven of course.

[Episode 327 — Bang! Bang! Into Your Mouth!]

"

*singing*

You all should put this

Bang Bang, into your mooooouth

 

"You know you wanna"

[Episode 442 - Atlantis Dire Warning]

I liked when Scott was worried about the offensiveness of talking about why vampires don't get AIDS, while talking to Ming about how Magic Johnson is like Blacula.

[The Love Shack = A brothel]

you just blew my.........................................................dick. thank you

[I once knew a girl with the Zika, and the doc said "I can't treat ya", after she died, I ate out her pie, which smelt even worse than her sneakahs]

She was originally from the Greater Boston Area

[The world is darkness we are but lost souls wandering its desolate landscape. Wait, why is this catchphrase giving me a boner.]

[Episode 440 - Pop-TarTender]

Did (s)he stay? What a cliffhanger!

[Assumption is the mother of all fuck ups. But who's the father? We'll find out today on Maury!]

It's me

[Good Morning Mr. Hunt. Your mission should you choose to accept it, involves the extraction of a prominent gerbil from an unseemly location.]

This piece of paper will self destruct in 5 seconds because we have nothing better to do with our vast amount of technological prowess.

[Episode 439 - It's Great (An Improv Team)]

Wilfred = Rolly

[Good evening, I called you all here this evening to make an important announcement. Remember that pig for sale at McGregor's Farm, well I fucked it.]

Cooooool

[Here's a story the LIBERAL MEDIA doesn't want you to hear. The old man that sold Jack all those magic beans....Benghazi survivor.]

It's all in the emails.

[My name is Magnus and here are my many many sons, in fact I'd say that this room has more Magnussons than an Icelandic phone book.]

I apologize for nothing.

[Started vacation in the Bahamas, ended vacation with yo mama.]

She really gets me

[We welcome you laugh-ers, you gaffers, and cardiographers. We even welcome the low level staffers! Welcome to the show of which the hearlds have sang,]

Welcome to Jurassic Park. Comedy Bang Bang.

[The pen is mightier than the sword, but rock beats pen.]

Always throw rock

[7 years since the virus swept through the population killing everyone but me and I still can't pee without being given say-so. Not one drop.]

Poor Red

[Poor people need to get a grip.....on some money!]

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