CaptPukeFish

Look, I'm just going to come clean with you. Unless you want the dirty come special, which is extra.

Was that even a plugs theme?

if its any consolation, he was able to prolong his suffering for days by eating his own organs. He hikes with Satan now.

Sorry, I'm not really a big fan. I'm just a giant windmill.

I promise I'm not a giant windmill. I'm just a really big fan.

"Subtlety is the key to good comedy" he whispered from his dickhole as he blew a wet fart in the dead clown's face.

I just flew back from a Transformers convention, and boy were their arms tires.

Now everyone please, put your hands together for the officers connecting your handcuff chains. This crowd is under arrest. We found the bodies.

Catchphrases should be called "throw slogans". Hulk Slogan, Sulk Goblin, Slogans Run, Mohegan Sun, Run Hulk Run. I'm having a stroke.

Mayor McCheese, same question. How do we make milkshake lake more whimsical, and given what we now know about Grimace, is the death penalty too lenient?

I love Halloween because it's one of only three holidays a year when I'm allowed to wear my gimp suit out in public.

It's 3AM. The blood from your leg is indistinguishable from the rusty teeth of the crushing bear trap. Is that your tibia or fibula showing? It's both but it doesn't matter. You hear the familiar but foreboding sound of ice cream truck music rising in the distance. It signals only death, as it has for all of the others before you. That's when you remember it - the refreshing taste of Sprite Zero.

We would frolic through the apocalypse, our souls asunder, forever juvenile, our cheese...fromunda.

Your majesty, may I present, the Gypsy Moth Handjobs.

Staying true to his vision, he made the incision. Wide split the rectum, in went the pigeon.

Boys Life magazine proclaims "It's like being finger-blasted by the shadow puppets of the one true Christian god, but with mattress advertisements."

Born the bastard son of a cannon ball polisher and an albino seamstress, he would go on to become the sexiest beatboxer in the robot brothel.

I awake to a butterfly burrowing itself inside me. A car door slams. He is here; The Bag Maker. I remove the poison via my urethra. It is my birthday.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, over the next few months, the prosecution will try to convince u this isn't a picture of a sasquatch penis

I saw my entire future in her eyes.And at some point in that future a flaming runaway sausage cart goes barreling into a funeral home.It was true love

Don't call them midgets. Text them midgets. Them damn midgets never answer their phones.

As she entered the pleasure tub,the occupants gasped.Such low-hanging breasts were rarely seen round these parts.She flicked her cigarette confidently

We all watched him get eaten and all we did was stand around and ask questions. The blood of Gilbert Grape's masticated corpse is on all of our hands.

They don't tell you this in school, but you can fit sixteen and a half hamsters in a hamster ball.

cluedo reference/time zone bump