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TootyBut2DButt

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Everything posted by TootyBut2DButt

  1. Ladies put your hands in the air if you wanna dance! Fellas put your hands in the air if your city has a major unfunded pension liability!
  2. Look at Zsa Zsa Gaborscht-Belt over here.
  3. This is quite a sexual catchphrase.
  4. How do you poo the doo-doo that you poo so well
  5. Who the hell decided to put pictures of delicious food everywhere.
  6. You may be a brahmin but if you don’t shut your mouth you’re about to become a part of a different cast system.
  7. "Uh oh, here's comes one of those big-boned skeletons." said no one ever.
  8. I go hard in the paint, which people love, but I also get hard in the paint, which they’re less crazy about.
  9. Take me to the dance and make me feel like a lady, I'm tired of carrying the weight of being Tom Brady.
  10. You don't see a lot of fat mermaids.
  11. Looking for a way to spice things up in the bedroom? Try barbecue sauce. It's not just for food anymore.
  12. TootyBut2DButt

    Bitcoin is stupid.

    Bitcoin is stupid.
  13. "Imagine how funny it would be if a bug could play the drums", said John Lennon.
  14. When I was a boy I heard the story of Icarus and was always afraid I'd fly too close to the sun. Thankfully it turns out the sun is 93 million miles away so I can start going on planes again.
  15. One time I went on a canoe date with this chick who couldn’t talk and there was a crab there who really wanted us to fuck.
  16. I'm in the gym all day, everyday. I live in the vents and I stare at people, if only I could be part of their world.
  17. Picture this but constantly for two weeks.
  18. Things are worse than they've ever been, but not as bad as they used to be.
  19. “Credit or debit?” he whispered mischievously in my ear, but the joke was on him, for I had no buttcrack.
  20. Bros before hoes, never been sicker. Hoes before bros, you're in the clear.
  21. TootyBut2DButt

    Bronouns before honouns.

    Bronouns before honouns.
  22. And the Lord spake, "Let they that is without sin cast the next Ghostbusters" and it was good.
  23. Let the licking commence.
  24. If it looks like I’m hard it’s just a canard.
  25. I hope no one CANCELS me for any of my SAVAGE catchphrases.
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