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Everything posted by TootyBut2DButt

  1. A lot of people think of me as the original Narnia.
  2. If you liked Anthony’s wiener you’re going to love Boris’s johnson.
  3. A 2017 study from Harvard found that across standardized testing 12% of answers were A’s, 9% of answers were B’s, 4% of answers were C’s and 75% of answers were D’s nuts.
  4. Jesus’s name was really Josh.
  5. If you ask me we should chuck him in a lorry.
  6. I’m tired of porn parodies, it’s time for porn satires.
  7. 2 points form a line, 4 lines make a square, 8 squares make-a a-64, Nintendo 64 make-a it’s-a-me, Mario. Yahoo!
  8. There’s nothing I love more than old Conan, it’s the wrinkles and loose skin that really get me going.
  9. You can’t spell Suez Canal without my porn name: Zeus C. Anal.
  10. Put your clothes back on Bill, this isn't what people are talking about when they say "gender reveal party".
  11. How's this for an original catchphrase: my social security number is 263-54-8164.
  12. This is embarrassing to ask, but did the vaccine give anyone else a huge boner!?
  13. And you can tell everybody this is your thong song.
  14. Does anyone else have a burning desire to do Calpurnia?
  15. The priest was feeling a little Randy and a little Billy, so he was arrested.
  16. The irony of the phrase “online pornography” is if you google “online pornography” you won’t find any online pornography.
  17. If you’re horny I’d recommend searching “sexy sexy sex and all kinds of genitals all over and they’re a nice size and hot and doing it really good and fast with lots of orgasms for all the people naked in the bed”.
  18. I drink out of vases because because I'm classy.
  19. Calling this a topless bar isn’t cute, pay to fix the goddamn roof.
  20. I really don’t know anyone who isn’t stubborn.
  21. I haven’t tried being burped as an adult but maybe that would improve things.
  22. I just cover my whole house in sawdust so I can puke anywhere.
  23. "What's an independent Claus? Well it's not one of my fucking good nothing children!" screamed an irate Santa Claus.
  24. Banish these remonstrances! You've violated our most basic principles! This was meant to be place for only fans!
  25. You discussed me. And you discussed how I disgust you. You disgust me.