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Content count
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Posts posted by TootyBut2DButt
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Sometimes I get so horny I want to have sex.
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I love to be satisfied, but I’m insatiable.
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I’m going to be on the Love Island spin-off, Glove Island, where a bunch single people wearing gloves are put on an island and just kind of play it by ear after that.
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Pictures of penis available upon request, all requests will be denied.
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Praying for the victims of the Impractical Jokers tonight.
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Judas was a patsy.
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Fuck me softly, fuck me loudly, whatever you do just fuck me proudly.
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Hey wait a second. Â I think this song might be a metaphor for having sex!
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Uh, why didn’t Don Henley and Glenn Frey just take the Ring to Mordor?
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People who don’t have toilet plungers in their bathrooms are sadists.
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One time John Maynard Keynes gave me an invisible handjob.
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The cause of death was ruled suicide by diarrhea.
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Sometimes I like to get really horny and then jerk off to completion.
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My favorite way to jerk off? Â To completion.
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The best way to loosen things up south of the border is to do jalapeño poppers.
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Laughter is my drug and podcasts are my dealer.
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Someone poisoned my food…with shit.
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Friends are like flowers in the garden of life. Â Enemies are like flies in the shit-heap of death.
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The beefy queefy has gone down as the worst selling item ever at Carl’s Jr.Â
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I thought my shit didn’t stink until one day I smelled it and was like, oh my god this smells like shit.
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When I was a kid a rom com meant a Romanian comedian.
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I love broiled food.
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There’s a raven rapping at my chamber door.  That’s so raven.
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Aquaman’s mom had to have a sea section.
You give glove a bad name, Michael Jackson.
in New Catchphrase Suggestions
Posted
You give glove a bad name, Michael Jackson.