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Orange Juice Simpson

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Everything posted by Orange Juice Simpson

  1. Orange Juice Simpson
    CBB Bump
  2. Orange Juice Simpson
    Suddenly I’m persona non grata just because I buttchugged all the horchata.
  3. Orange Juice Simpson
    Everyday is taco Tuesday when you live in an abandoned Baja Fresh.
  4. Orange Juice Simpson
    Ass, gas or deGrasse. no one rides for free, Neil!
  5. Orange Juice Simpson
    It was colonel mustard in the library with the rope. That’s how he was found after dying of autoerotic asphyxiation.
  6. Orange Juice Simpson
    For the last time, I’m not gonna show you how to send dick pics on your phone. Ok talk to you later, Dad.
  7. Orange Juice Simpson
    I don’t see why I need to go to therapy just because I had an erotic nightmare about the Carfax Car Fox.
  8. Orange Juice Simpson
    Inside baseball fact: there’s rubber and yarn in there.
  9. Orange Juice Simpson
    I let out an obtuse chuckle after a loose suckle of your moose knuckle.
  10. Orange Juice Simpson
    Everybody’s working for The Weeknd, especially his assistant.
  11. Orange Juice Simpson
    Hip hop ya don’t stop, the proof is in the pudding pop.
  12. Orange Juice Simpson
    I scream, you scream, we all scream because we’re being held captive by a deranged lunatic.
  13. Orange Juice Simpson
    When life gives you the coronavirus, garnish it with a lime wedge.
  14. Orange Juice Simpson
    1) Hard Target 2) Sudden Death 3) Samurai Cop 4) Get Even 5) The Butterfly Effect
  15. Orange Juice Simpson
    If I had the moola to hire a doula, then you wouldn’t be giving birth in the ball pit of this Chuck E. Cheese.
  16. Orange Juice Simpson
    How are people supposed to know what I dislike if Calvin doesn’t pee on it?
  17. Orange Juice Simpson
    When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, ‘twas simply the horns played before would you rather.
  18. Orange Juice Simpson
    I don’t care that I’m banned from Long John Silvers, it’s my wedding day and I’ll eat where I want.
  19. Orange Juice Simpson
    Don’t tell me to mind my P’s and Q’s. My poops and queefs are none of your business!
  20. Orange Juice Simpson
    Should old acquaintance be forgot, then I regret to inform you that you may have Alzheimer’s.
  21. Orange Juice Simpson
    A candy cane in your tush, and my jingle bells in your Hanukkah bush.
  22. Orange Juice Simpson

    The Fanatic (2019)

    Orange Juice Simpson replied to Gordon Shumway's topic in Bad Movie Recommendations

    This is streaming on Amazon. Holy fuck... this movie is like if someone watched Nightcrawler, Big Fan, and Rain Man and then huffed spray paint and tried to transcribe them all from memory into one voltron-esque turd smoothie. Let’s put aside Travolta’s ridiculous performance and appearance for a moment. A few highlights include: -Travolta dressed as an English Bobby with a fake mustache doing a bad British accent. -A gratuitous Limp Bizket plug from director Fred Durst. -Travolta riding on a scooter with a Scientology sign in the background and then crashing on said scooter.
  23. Orange Juice Simpson
    Mistletoe in your tush, and my candy cane in your Hanukkah bush. Happy Holidays, Grandma.
  24. Orange Juice Simpson
    The world continues to wait in suspense, wondering if we will ever get five prequels to Leonard part 6.
  25. Orange Juice Simpson
    I’m afraid, Mr. Worell , that there is no Vern. You’ve simply been talking to yourself this whole time.
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