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Foolish Mortal

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About Foolish Mortal

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    Wolfpup

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  1. Are we human, or are we dancer? Or prancer? Or vixen? Or comet? Or cupid? Or donner? Or blitzen? We are reindeer.
  2. "I don't like the sound of that," I said, as the glass rod entered my urethra.
  3. LIKE A FEMALE PIG DO YOU GET IT
  4. Spare the rod and spoil the child, but dodge those pesky statutory charges.
  5. Like Schwaz through the hourglass, so is the house of our pies.
  6. "Right" said Fred. "Zoinks" said Shaggy.
  7. A friend is just a stranger you haven't alienated yet.
  8. Those who can, can-can. Those who do, doo doo.
  9. What is a butt, if not a farts volcano?
  10. My scuba instructor and I had very different ideas as to what "wet suit" meant.
  11. My lie of omission led to lying in my own emission.
  12. My proctometrist made me a monocle for my brown eye.
  13. Hey, Frasier, maybe you should donate those tossed salads and scrambled eggs to the homeless shelter, you wasteful, elitist fuck!
  14. Duran Duran ran to pick up Styx and bid Bon Jovi bon voyage on his journey with Journey.
  15. Because iZombie would not joke about you.
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