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Naked Lazer Lemonade

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About Naked Lazer Lemonade

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  1. Buy the ticket, take the ride. Get off the ride. Puke on your nephew.
  2. At the end of the day, it's all about family - more specifically stepmoms.
  3. This is my penis, and this is my gun. One is for fighting, one is for fun, and it's not the one you're thinking of.
  4. When I was 5 I watched my uncle get sucked up by a tornado. It feels good to finally get that off my chest.
  5. This is the day you will always remember as the day you almost caught Captain Dick Swallows.
  6. I'm not here for a good time, I'm here for the buffet.
  7. Thank you for playing everyone's favorite game show, "SKIP THE ADS!"
  8. Oscar Wilde once said, "Only the song and dance of a harp and a flute can get this dirty Irish boy out his gimp suit."
  9. There once was a witch who lived in the south, who punched my balls and spit in my mouth.
  10. It's not like I spend my day sitting at the bus stop. I'm just waiting for my erection to go away.
  11. My Polish doctor says a pierogi in the hand is worth 2 in your gut.
  12. Is that a banana in your pocket, or are you my half brother?
  13. It's time for a shower! Hit pause, and go do that then come back and listen to me.
  14. How's about a handful of soup, baby? That do anything for ya?
  15. I didn't become a vet to help dogs, I did it for the brass monkeys.
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