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Nasher

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Everything posted by Nasher

  1. There is just so much in the movie that is fun, amusing or simply makes no sense on a human or artistic basis. The movie has been mulled over by dozens of pod/vid casts and yet there is still room for more. Even watching the movie yourself things will occur to you, the walks and expressions need to be seen firsthand to be believed. Whitney really does come out best of a bad lot.. she seems worse than she is because of the stilted response to any dialogue. I give her great credit for embracing her fame and having fun with it. All power to her. My personal favorite scene is with the waitress at the start seating Rod.. she is incredibly unnatural and awkward in a way you cant believe a person could be... just sets a tone and level you can't believe.
  2. Nasher

    Episode 32 — 88 Minutes

    eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Geneparmesan its people like you that make the internet so damn awesome.. that years before you took the time to cut together a vid of Pacino touching women creepily from the movie. Sir I salute you and all your disguises. To be fair I were in his position I would instigate an acting method that required me to grope Leelee at every opportunity.. you know.. for the sake of drama.
  3. Nasher

    Tiptoes

    Surely there must be one hell of a debate over a statement like "the worst movie ever made starring matthew mcconaughey"... luckily "and Gary Oldman" makes the process easier. Dear god i just watched the trailer.. I can't believe what i was seeing.. there are some serious names in there not least of which, the now venerated, Mr Dinklage. Kate Beckinsale - Leather catsuit = Fail.
  4. Nasher

    Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star (2011)

    That is a fair point, let me clarify my stance: surely there is an unstated contract that says I want your money.. for which i will provide you worthy entertainment. Fail to provide the entertainment and the process becomes: Give me your money.. just because.
  5. Nasher

    Tango & Cash or Over the Top

    Corba was really poor on too many levels and Stallone freely acknowledges it but Tango & Cash was made to be hyperactively ridiculous.. I mean the opening scene where criminals put the brakes on their tanker rather than drive into or around Stallone who goes onto call Rambo a pussy and shoot said tanker and lap up a handful of drugs. Then you have Kurt being shot at by an Asian who appears through his mirror and returns fire with what appears to be a gun/boot. Leading to a foot chase with boobies and Kurt produces a gun with a vast laser sight bigger than the gun itself. All in the first 10 minutes! Then there's the self-deprecating gay jokes, soap dropped in the shower routine, possibly the most American British bad guy ever who speaks only in colloquialisms, tooled up SUV's, Q's bond lab rip-off and the least naked exotic dancer ever... oh and Kurt in drag.
  6. Nasher

    Mannequin

    That would just be being cruel... for everyone concerned.. its taken 2 decades for the mental scars to fade.. not sure i could take another bashing from this movie or its fantastic sequel.
  7. Nasher

    Lake Placid

    You cannot fail with a foulmouthed, borderline racist Betty White versus mutated crocodiles... superbly funny movie that delivers on the campy goodness of remaking Jaws with a crocodile.
  8. Nasher

    Hulk (2003)

    It so unusual for a director to be miscast in a movie but Ang Lee seems to have made that a new possibility by balking at making a super hero movie and deciding instead to make an artistic exploration of angst and loss with some leaping around in the last 10 minutes. I recall renting it with friends and two of us were asleep before half way and were warned not to bother with finishing the movie the next day.
  9. Nasher

    Shaolin Soccer

    One of those ideas that is so perfect you wonder why no one tried it earlier. Chow as his poor, young, idealistic kung fu master alter-ego who believes martial arts is the answer to everything in every day life. Struggling to find a way to honour his former master and the arts he imparted he discovers soccer. With the aid of a wronged former soccer star he gathers a team who employ their skills to defeat an evil team. The clever combining of real martial skills with cgi in inventive ways really makes the movie interesting to watch. Wire-fu that doesn't suck and the slapstick comedy is just the topping with good humored jokes and a heartwarmingly hopeful story. Scenes like: underwater football training, egg practice, playing against a team who use weapons, dumpling fu with song & dance are all so wonderful. I actually saw it after Kung Fu Hustle, which would also make for great material. One really interesting thing with those Stephen Chow movies is the differing experience you get from watching with subtitles and the deliberately comic English dub that alters the characters and puts things in a new light... again a master stroke of marketing and vision you sadly don't seem to get anywhere else.
  10. Nasher

    Con Air.

    Not to mention the most kangaroo court scene ever where Cage is slapped on the wrist for being a killing machine that should know better than to defend his and his wife's honour and lives.. just so he can be imprisoned. Incompetent guards and security at every juncture just to allow the plot to happen. .. and a finale where an industrial hammer device is being used in road construction, if i recall correctly, just happens to be conveniently placed to dispatch the villain off screen. You know it might just have been long enough for me to risk re-watching this for the first time.
  11. Nasher

    In Time

    Time travel.. you either embrace it and stick to the rules.. but then you get a film not unlike Primer (totally awesome movie but bonkers hard to get your head around even after 3 viewings and a timeline drawing) or you say bugger it... lets keep it real simple and you get movies like 'Time after Time' and 'The Timetravelers Wife'.. and then you get the 'just because we said so' where its all a mess of paradoxical ideas that they just ignore. You have to buy a lot of good will for those to work i.e. Star Trek episodes.
  12. Truly awful live-action cartoon nonsense. I remember the trailers for it made it look really fun packed and exciting with roadrunner like visuals. Then you saw it.. the fun fantasy elements were all in the trailer and the rest was excruciatingly boring story about making a film.. One of my pet peeves is main characters in novels being novelists or journalists and the same with movie characters who are movie writers. It can be done well but mostly is just allows the writer to be lazy and just make the character themselves.
  13. Nasher

    Bio-Dome (1996)

    Movies are a very personal thing.. me and my ex would argue over films constantly as to their relative merits.. i find modern American comedies intensely uncomfortable and unfunny to watch.. watching Baby Mama was one of the worst cinematic experiences of my life.. i can only describe it as feeling like my brain was corroding and it was physically sapping my intelligence. Now she loved it and was insulted that it made me uncomfortable.. we had pretty much the reverse conversation when i put on Silent Running. Where and when you saw a movie makes a huge difference.. where you were, who you were with. I watched Se7en in horrible, front row, neck straining seats at after a nasty break up and i find that film an over hyped piece of junk with an obvious ending i worked out an hour before.. not to mention the general plot which made the deaths a lot less interesting. I know Fincher is a fine director and i love his stylistic choices and i should love that film on paper.. but i don't.
  14. Nasher

    Death Wish 3 (1985)

    Death Wish movies were a guilty pleasure of my youth.. they used to play them on late night tv and Bronson was this amazing bad-ass vigilante without good looks or emotion. It was like an Eastwood movie but more real world basis.. sure it was over the top but being set in a cityscape with a violent revenge plot that gave out anti-hero cause was somehow engaging. The critics hated it for its violence without enough comedic elements to make it escapist.. the people loved it because it was just so vicious in intent and dispensed with much of the Hollywood stuff that reminds you that its just a movie. By DW3 there was more hollywood quipping and less plot for sure. Its notable for 0% critical response on Rotten Tomatoes and yet a 5.5% on IMDB and how Michael Winner and Charles Bronson worked together on each movie. What is horrifying is that Stallone wants to reboot it with him starring.. and afyer the abomination of get carter too.
  15. Nasher

    Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star (2011)

    The though of giving money to the makers of this movie, even a rental fee, depresses me too much...and isn't the reason for it being made that Adam Sandler wants your money?
  16. Nasher

    Hobo with a Shotgun

    There has been a trend since Shoot em Up and Crank in making deliberately "bad" movies with low budget and just going for it.. with the Grindhouse thing really lighting up the movement with those fake trailers turned movies. The thought of a plot based around giving a homeless Rutger Hauer a shotgun and seeing what happens is highly appealing to me on so many levels.
  17. Nasher

    Next (2007)

    *was sick in his own mouth a little*
  18. Nasher

    This Means War (2012)

    It sounds like the rival studio movie to Mr & Mrs Smith (and that awful J.J. Abrams tv show that tanked recently) but got released 2 years too late.
  19. Oddly not that obscure and even more oddly not in the forums already apparently! Yes possibly the most series threatening movie ever made. Retcon in full effect by undoing every element stated in the law of the first movie: there being only one, immortality, Connery dying, the eternal battle coming to an end. Also the insertion of an alien subplot and hoverboards. How the series survived, well struggled on, after that was a miracle in itself. For me there is only one Highlander.. and no other movies or tv shows at all. My favorite parts are: * the line "I want you to leave for the future.. Immediately!" * Assassins unable to kill an old man with either swords or guns by attacking individually or with flying suits, also on top of a very slow moving train. * Mirroring the opening sword battle in 1 with one between an oldman, with no sword!, and 2 slow and inept assassins. * General Katana's sword?... why some sort of unweildy, heavy, broadsword for course. * Ramírez paying for a suit with an pearl earring the store own simply accepts at face value. * Commuter tubes with no security or safety features and capable of 600mph+ * MacLoed is some sort of scientist now? Who invents a pseudo ozone? or something.. * Standard future anachronisms of 50's motorcars everywhere and 80's music. * People who know MacLoed not surprised he has de-aged 40years. * MacLoed seemingly has forgotten his wife, the driving force behind the first movie, and then we are suddenly reminded of it multiple times. * Impaling a taxi screen in an impossible way with a sword longer than the back seat. * Forcing Mr Ironside to dress and read lines seemingly written for The Kurgan * In flight safety demonstration that shows nothing helpful but rather fiery planes crashing. * Not to mention how exactly Ramírez got onto a plane when he has only just learned of air-travel. * Ramírez' funky disco fan room scene where all he had to do was open the panel for them to escape. * Clumsy, slow sword battles that stop for no reason, much like swords that spark seemingly at random. * The weird excuse that 'turning off' the shield requires massive amounts of energy being unexplained. * MacLoed's magically produces a Katana to fight Katana. Lots of weird timeskips in general. * MacLoed electrocuting Katana while holding him and doesn't feel a thing. Yes a movie so bad it was one of the first to be re-cut into a different movie and released for the home audience, something fans do for turds like the Star Wars prequels, and it was done by the director twice no less. If they do this movie they have to watch the original to understand why its so bad and possibly see the Renegade Version to give it even more context... now that's an epic night of fantasy sword fighting fun in anyone's books.
  20. Nasher

    Freejack (1992)

    Thankfully i only saw this movie once when it was on commercial TV over here in the UK.. i think i stuck it through the first 2 ad breaks but if i watched beyond that it has been erased from my memory.
  21. Nasher

    Orphan (2009)

    You do have a duty of case when making and marketing a movie and sure there are enough people for whom separation of fantasy from reality is hard enough (Like people who think a soap-opera villain is that person in real life and harass them or give them relationship advice). But I think the vast majority know the difference between a horror movie that uses a real world situation to create a situation to mine... and after all when you identify with the situation on a human level you put yourself more into the movie. Of course movies also like to skip the boring bits, like legal work and the details that wouldn't be fun to watch but happen in the real world. There have been a number of cases in the UK unfortunately of late where adoptees have committed heinous deeds due to lack of care on the part of the government department.. In placing dangerous children in inappropriate families. I think those cases did far more damage to the system than any movie. And of course the kind of lax adoption system shown in the movie is not what exists anymore in first world countries, its all run through government agencies to help obviate such issues.
  22. Go to: Earwolf Forums → Earwolf Productions → How Did This Get Made? → Bad Movie Recommendations Type the movie name in the white search box top right and press the yellow spyglass button. See if the movie is already listed: add to the conversation to get this movie shortlisted. If not: Feel free to start it as a new topic and add a it to the list. Oh and you might want to check the archive of movies already done too incase your wish has already been fulfilled. -- Think that about sums it up.
  23. Really good show guys.. my faith is restored.. you watched the movie and rambled your way through the non-plot making us smile and laugh.. good work. Excellent movie choice too.. new movie reviews limit your show as we have to pay to see it or rent it and more importantly there's no history to give context to the movie and enrich your commentary. I realize when you get a guest in its polite to trade their time for free plugs.. but the last few (especially this one) seem like the guests are here for the plug and not the movie.. partly why I think your earlier episodes were so fun as it was all about the show and nothing else. Often in the UK interviewers get the guest to do the job first and then reward them with the plug at the end. When your running time gets shorter and more is taken up with adverts it kinda saps the fun. But enough complaints.. super show, super movie. Mark Nash (No relation)
  24. Nasher

    Take Me Home Tonight

    I like how that poster names the two people i painfully recognize but fails to name the two i don't.. Have to assume thats because their names wouldn't sell the movie.. so it seems odd that they take up 50% of the space.
  25. Nasher

    Insidious

    When Mr Wan's career and ideas stalled after the fluke of Saw... he obvious thought i know.. I'll rip of the plot and characters from Poltergeist and make no reference to the fact and sell it to the studio. Then I'll replace tension, chills, quotable dialogue, iconic imagery and amazing special/practical effects with 2 jump scares and the most bland ending ever. But how do I invent a super scary demonic entity that no one has seen before.. I know! I'll give Darth Maul sideburns and maybe satyr legs. A creation so scary that a child's crayon drawing of it is far more frightening than it is in person. And in case that's not enough lets make it PG13 with visual cues ripped from Paranormal Activity.
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