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Status Updates posted by tonidanza

  1. Across the country clever-hipsters are feverishly racing to produce the silliest binder of women trapper keeper covers #GodsWork

  2. The Berenstein Bears run Hollywood

  3. .@AaronSorkin hey bro touche on writing this season's eleciton! Ep1 'Sleepy Prez' was a total curve, Ep2 'Biden Time' floored me!

  4. Degobah= Yoda's home planet, Dego Bah= Italian Bistro in South Boston

  5. If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, & quacks like a duck, it probably takes u too long to determine when something is a duck or not

  6. As a preventitive measure for skipping school I plan to show my children "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" then a picture of Sarah Jessica Parker

  7. .@BarackObama Your dick brother-in-law just cheated and beat us...I expect you to fix this immediately if you want my vote

  8. Remember that show 'the Pickup Artist' on MTV? I'm exactly like Mystery...in the sense that I like dressing like the guy from Jamiroquai

  9. I am 0-26 on "Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Let's say it at the same time on the count of 3"

  10. What do you mean I'm defensive!?

  11. Everyone knows that Lincoln hunted vampires while in office but did you also now he ended slavery! #TMYK (shooting star)

  12. Is that a boner in your pocket or am I just bad at sexual euphemisms?

  13. Currently working on a character called "gay nazi" who wears Ugg boots because he thinks they're kampfy

  14. Making a biopic on the play "Our American Cousin", gonna skip all that fluff Lincoln nonsense & get straight to the cousin on cousin stuff

  15. A cool black guy just walked into the coffee shop I'm at! We're up to one cool black guy now!

  16. Just want to reiterate I would never have unconsensual sex with a koala

  17. RT @BARRIELLOYD: @tonidanza yeah but my custom studded phone case looks amaze. Totes worth it.

  18. Does anyone know what the gestation period of a Snooki is?

  19. White chicks love wine tasting

  20. Do you guys think Kanye West goes too far sometimes?...it seems like he has a lot of outfits

  21. Sorta on the fence about becoming a spokesperson for the unopionated

  22. Dont care what religion, sexual preference, or political affiliation you are but if you say "ma-tour" instead of "mature" go fuck urself :)

  23. Its weird to watch the best actor nominees come up and not hear the name Penn called...better luck next year Kal #Oscars

  24. Definitely just saw King Jaffe Joffa's butler! #Oscars #Nmumba

  25. Just found out 'Jersey Boys' is a musical and not what gay people call NFL players