tonidanza

Need some startup cash for a new religion/someone who's good at sound effects

Fun cooking tip: Saute your onions w/ ether, ask the elephant standing next to you to help w/ the sauce, stir w/ scooter periscope

Just found out 'Jersey Boys' is a musical and not what gay people call NFL players

I'm half my dad and half my mom and 100% have a pe-gina

Hey guys, so http://t.co/wFGFz6VI is available...does anyone know anything about fashion or quirkiness?

it's probably super hard to vent to evil villains

The one day a year us Dickensian chimney sweeps can walk the streets without torment towards our appearance! #AshWednesday

Sorta on the fence about becoming a spokesperson for the unopionated

Not a lot of other things that fall into the soft core category

Jewless Joe Jackson (he also didn't have Jews)

Definitely just saw King Jaffe Joffa's butler! #Oscars #Nmumba

Its weird to watch the best actor nominees come up and not hear the name Penn called...better luck next year Kal #Oscars

Dont care what religion, sexual preference, or political affiliation you are but if you say "ma-tour" instead of "mature" go fuck urself

Do you guys think Kanye West goes too far sometimes?...it seems like he has a lot of outfits

White chicks love wine tasting

Does anyone know what the gestation period of a Snooki is?

RT @BARRIELLOYD: @tonidanza yeah but my custom studded phone case looks amaze. Totes worth it.

Just want to reiterate I would never have unconsensual sex with a koala

What do you mean I'm defensive!?

A cool black guy just walked into the coffee shop I'm at! We're up to one cool black guy now!

Making a biopic on the play "Our American Cousin", gonna skip all that fluff Lincoln nonsense & get straight to the cousin on cousin stuff

Everyone knows that Lincoln hunted vampires while in office but did you also now he ended slavery! #TMYK (shooting star)

Remember that show 'the Pickup Artist' on MTV? I'm exactly like Mystery...in the sense that I like dressing like the guy from Jamiroquai

Is that a boner in your pocket or am I just bad at sexual euphemisms?

I am 0-26 on "Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Let's say it at the same time on the count of 3"