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JSacks06

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Posts posted by JSacks06

  2. Posted

    This movie was not terrible. While humor is entirely subjective, the film is bad for other reasons. It clocks in at a mere 81 minutes which is basically saying that studio execs cut it down to maximize laughs. Regardless of quality or originality or depth, each character had an arch that given 20 minutes more of development would have been recognized as poignant. What I'm getting at is this movie is undeservedly bad due to the powers that be. If you want to see a terrible terrible movie, go watch Jack and Jill, a movie that only Armond White and Adam Sandler can defend. If you do subject yourselves to the punishment of Drag Me to Hell 2 (aka Jack and Jill) read White's review, it's extremely well written however it doesn't quite match the film it defends.

  3. Posted

    Easily the worst movie I have ever seen. Yes the film is barely 90 minutes but its aftermath nearly ruined two days of my life. Who the fuck thought this would be a funny movie? The whole crux of the movie revolves around Al Pacino wanting to fuck Adam Sandler in drag (it's strange how committed Pacino is to this satire of himself (and now writing that down, the concept is bizarre and intriguing dare I say hilarious). This movie should have been called Drag Me to Hell 2 because thats exactly what it did. There are also a ton of bizarre cameos. I don't want to ruin them just just grab a 24 pack of Pabst and let Adam Sandler drag you to hell.

  7. Posted

    I know this one may be a bit obscure, but it is totally a cluster fuck of a movie. Basically,it follows Highlander 1 up by not only upping the stakes, but also totally obscuring them. Lambert, the Highlander (who is an alien so why are they calling him by his earth creed?), has used his ultimate knowledge powers, the same one's he received for decapitating Clancy Brown, to cure global warming. Lambert is now mortal and is about to die when all of a sudden, Michael Ironside sends some dudes on flying skateboards to Earth to kill him. After a breathtaking flying sword fight, Lambert is the Highlander again. He bones Virginia Madsen like it aint no thang. Then some other shit happens. Sean Connery, playing Juan Sanchez Villa-Lobos Ramierez, is summomed back to life like fucking Beetlejuice. He serves absolutely NO relevance to the plot and cracks insane anachronistic jokes. Then Global Warming happens again, John C McGinely and Ironside team up. More sword fights. Oh yeah, did I mention they were aliens? PLEASE see this movie!

    • Like 2

  8. Posted

    I think what most needs to be talked about is the fact that Witherspoon's character ignores all the sociopathic things her two men do. Tom Hardy beats the shit out of a two dozen people while playing paintball, VIOLENTLY!

    There's a scene where the two guys demolish, seriously not a glass remained intact, a restaurant in a brawl with each other and when Witherspoon comes out of the bathroom all she can say is, "you two know each other?"

     

    This movie was BAD

    • Like 1

  11. Posted

    Sure, I totally agree that adoption shouldn't be taken lightly, but that's EXACTLY what this film does. If the whole film is a "be careful of whom you adopt," then you probably- scratch that- definitely shouldn't use this film as an argument . This film simply plays on the gimmick of a creepy kid which is why an adoption plot is entirely inappropriate. Unless, you're saying that people should be weary when adopting because the youth that they are opening their homes to might wield a hammer and kill a nun (among other people). It's more of Fatal Attraction meets The Omen (oh, so that's how it got made). This movie states: if you adopt a kid, that kid could kill a nun with hammer. If you want a realistic depiction of the horror that adoption leads to or simply want a film that raises awareness of the risks of adoption, check out the Oscar nominated short, Raju, not a movie that's tag line is, "There's something wrong with Ester."

  13. Posted

    Seriously one of the best/worst twists ever. Writing this I realize that Tosh.0 already spoiled it, but hey, they didn't do it justice. There are so many things wrong with Orphan like: WHY THE FUCK ARE THEY TRYING TO SCARE PEOPLE OUT OF ADOPTING?, who is their target audience?, where does that girl get so much glow in the dark paint? There are some great oedipal twists and turns. Too much fun. If you haven't seen this, you NEED to.

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