Jump to content
🔒 The Earwolf Forums are closed Read more... ×


  • Content count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won


Posts posted by klemjohansen


    Yeah...doesn't it suck when the Earwolf Police come by your house every time they do one, point a gun at your head, and force you to listen.


    But thanks for sharing your opinion. You seem like a lovely person.


    Earwolf Police - a terrible Cheap Trick song from one of the many times when they tried to revamp their career. Give it a rest, guys!

    • Like 4

  2. I have a theory as to why there were virtually no extras in this film, and it ties in with the confusing time period of the film:


    The Cuban Missile Crisis took place in 1962, early in the run of the original show. Imagine a world in which the events that October turned out differently and the U.S. and U.S.S.R engaged in nuclear war, using long-rumored neutron bombs which could kill millions but leave buildings in tact. So, the few who remain who aren't gravely ill with radiation poisoning begin to rebuild things precisely as they remember them. A generation later, the population is still very small (no extras). Now it's the mid 1990's but some things look (and some people dress) exactly as they did in 1962. They're imitating what they remember from surviving film & TV, a connection to a time before those horrible events. In fact, Peel & Steed are imitating the banter and sexual innuendo they saw on the original show, but it comes off cold and false because they're constantly reminded that everyone they once loved is now dead, and soon they will be as well.


    Basically, this:


    • Like 3


    This is really awesome. Thanks for taking the time to do this. Impressive how official you made the box & logo look. Can't wait to play the game!


    Whoah. I had no idea Tommy Middle-D quoted this on Twitter. I'd print & frame it if it wouldn't look kinda sad.



    It would.


  4. As a guy, if you've ever gone in for a fertility test and come out with decent numbers, you really feel like bragging about it but at the same time you knew that would be weird and wrong.


    That's how I think this movie came to be- a B-movie producer spooged in a cup, got great results and

    then proceeded to tell everyone about it. "Dude, your high motility numbers are not the kind of thing you just bring up in casual conversation." And he leans back in his chair and said, "aw, fuck it. I'll make a movie so millions (thousands) (dozens) of people will see it and have to hear about my fantastic sperm count!"

    • Like 1

  5. How could you not love this lil droid


    June allowing BB-8 into her home sounds like the classic "ironic mistake of trust" plot line of some of my favorite made-for-tv flicks.


    With her guard lowered, she'll won't notice the odd e-havior (see what I did there?) until it's too late: BB-8 popping out at her from a high shelf, brandishing a knife, and trying to seduce Paul hand-that-rocks-the-cradle style.


    In ten years this will be a Lifetime Original Movie - "Broken Lives: I Know It's Mission."

    • Like 2

  6. "One more time!"


    "No! No more times! I cannot milk shake any longer! And stop pointing at me, movie lady!!"




    Traffic Mgr: "Hello, this is WNBC in New York. You sent us a 1" broadcast dub of your Milk Council commercial."

    Steve G: "Yes, I think it's terrific! Isn't it just the best?"

    Traffic Mgr: "It's four and a half minutes long. How in the hell am I supposed to find space for a four minute commercial inside a two minute ad break?"

    Steve G: "Wow. I hadn't thought of that. Honestly, we just let the cameras roll and the guys just went nuts."

    Traffic Mgr: "Do you have the budget to expand it to a half hour and run it as an infomercial?"

    Steve G: "We blew our budget on silver lame short-shorts. Sorry."

  7. The sign clearly says "no rollerskating." That really took me out of the movie. The whole time I'm thinking "these people are scofflaws."



    I like the underlying message of the movie: fuck dentists.


    I also like the Grease poster on Guttenberg's wall his room is an Allan Car museum.

    • Like 1

  8. Knowing that the movie was directed by 70's sit-com actor Nancy Walker style of the intro sequence makes more sense. The song is like a TV theme song, and the split screen, the random parade and all of Gutenburg's "Oh, yeah! I love this fucking transistor radio!" gestures fit perfectly. I expected it to go to an ad for Brill Cream when it finished.


    "Let me pause and boogie for a little bit while these garbage men do their thing. Yeah! Look at my fucking radio!"





    Also, Paul Sand! Paul Sand is the pre-Reagan era Jeff Goldblum. He's so Goldblum, even Goldblum is like 'um... yeah, well, you see... um, turn down your Goldblum just a little."

  9. 6ttydZV.jpg

    "hmmm, does Billy 'like me' like me? Has our father been murdered?"


    "I dunno, sis. Let's ...[rattle rattle] consult the bones!"


    From the makers of the Magic 8-Ball - it's Consult the Bones by Parker Brothers, America's number one maker of



    "Does sleeping with my butt in the air cause the Cat in the Hat to sneak into our home at night?"


    "Great question! Let's scatter a collection of our biological mother's bones and interpret them to divine secrets from the past, present and fuuuuuture!"


    Got a burning question? Need a clue to solve that big case? Consult the bones! -Available at most major retailers.

    • Like 12