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RyanSz

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Everything posted by RyanSz

  1. That's real cheap to use Troll 2 on the list as it isn't really a sequel to the original Troll, that would be like saying Zombi 2 is an actual sequel to Dawn of the Dead. I'm honestly surprised Return of the Living Dead 2 made the list as that actually is a pretty solid sequel to the first return, but I'm guessing it barely has the minimum number of reviews as it has no critical consensus listed for it. As for Freddy vs. Jason that was a great film as a horror fan because it had just enough setup to give us reason as to why they would be fighting and the final battle succeeds in giving the viewer a full fledged fight between to slasher icons that is basically the entire third act of the film, where as in movies like King Kong vs. Godzilla or Batman vs. Superman it is a short scene that is more of a plot device rather than the endgame of the movie. For things missing from the list, I'd add Blade Trinity as it was clear Snipes was doing it for the paycheck and phoning in his performance and while it got decent reviews from critics, Godfather part 3 is one of the worst sequels ever, especially as a follow up to arguably the greatest sequel ever made in part 2. I know Francis Ford Coppola has said he is re-editing it with additions being made to the beginning and end to show off his true vision, but that was just a soulless dumpster fire of a film that may just be beyond repair.
  2. RyanSz

    Episode 248 Velocipastor

    I think if you're working under the Frankie Mermaid on the rough streets of Rando-town, USA, I think you'd have learned some type of self defense. Also every time I hear more about what Tik Tok is, the less I know what it could possibly be.
  3. RyanSz

    Episode 248 Velocipastor

    I might also add that I think there's a little bit of Jonas from 2:22 in how Velocipastor looks. Overall I think this movie was the right amount of winking, especially in comparison to things that tried to force it like Birdemic 2, The Neighbors, or any Sharknado after the second one. I'd put this more in the vein of Black Dynamite where it plays into the tropes of so-bad-they're-good movies as that had done with Blacksploitation. Hearing that the sequel will have a couple million dollar budget has me concerned it will follow the same path as Birdemic 2 where it tried catching lightning twice, but leaned so hard into the hokiness that made people enjoy the first that it toppled over. As for the discussion of sauna beds, all I can say is be careful in using them and having someone there to check on you in case you fall asleep in one, because you will not like what you look like once you get out after you've been wrapped in one for a couple hours:
  4. RyanSz

    A Sound of Thunder (2005)

    Ben Kingsley's career is so interesting to look through after he won an Oscar. Outside of a few standout performances like Sexy Beast, Schindler's List, and Bugsy, the bulk of his career have just been of the awful camp. You have Species, What Planet Are You From?, Thunderbirds, Suspect Zero, Bloodrayne, and War Inc, though the latter has one of my favorite scenes in a movie where John Cusack is "fighting" a motorized wheelchair bound Kinglsey by simply side stepping him, causing Kingsley to chide him and yelling at him "fight me like a dude, man."
  5. So while this is not near the worst film in the X-Men franchise (that still belongs to either Dark Phoenix or the first Wolverine), The New Mutants is far from the best. Mediocre in almost every way outside some actually pretty decent horror scenes, this movie is just kind of there, although the story about this movie's trek through production over the last few years is pretty interesting. Really I only want this movie to be covered for the fact that it actually allows for Paul to do a callback to the Winter's Tale episode where in this movie one of the characters explains in his backstory that he basically killed his girlfriend because his dick was too warm.
  6. RyanSz

    Episode 247.5: Prequel to Episode 248

    Yeah I enjoyed hunting a bit though doing so also gave me some of the closest moments to pissing myself as that game has a knack for scaring the hell out of you with animal sneak attacks, whether it be from snakes, gators, or damn mountain lions. Then you also got to worry about cultists playing possum, cannibals trying to eat you, or any number of the fricking serial killers running around the old west. The only downside I found with that game was the lack of simple fast travel as that map is goddamn gigantic.
  7. RyanSz

    Episode 247.5: Prequel to Episode 248

    Velocipastor is pretty nutty and I was sold as soon as the "insert burned car" or whatever popped up on the screen. As for RDR2, that was a truly amazing game that still hasn't had all of its easter eggs and hidden gems discovered in it, plus you can literally spend hours doing countless things that don't do anything to progress you through the game as Jason was doing by fishing and hunting, and still feel fulfilled when you stop playing.
  8. RyanSz

    Hollywood Homicide (2003)

    It is a real Hollywood-centric trope because they did a similar thing in La La Land where Emma Stone emailed a bunch of agents/casting directors and invited them to her one woman show. Yet as Emily Heller pointed out and Cracked later reported on, she didn't BCC the emails and made this mix of fairly big industry names and mid-level guys all the recipient, so everyone could see each other's email address which is a business no-no and makes you come of as an idiot and not worth hiring, which leads to the scene where a small fraction of the recipients showing up to her show.
  9. RyanSz

    The Number 23 (2007)

    If they don't get James Adomian for this episode then this is all for nothing!
  10. RyanSz

    The Number 23 (2007)

    Prior to this post are 46 other posts, which is 23 twice. Also not including short films or bit parts/cameos when he was getting into acting, this is Carrey's 23rd major theatrical release.
  11. RyanSz

    Hollywood Homicide (2003)

    I kinda understand the reasoning for renting a theater to showcase your acting ability and that you're so dedicated to the craft because you're willing to do so, but it seems like something that would have been common in the 30s and 40s when there wasn't things like demo reels that a person could submit to a casting agent. It's like Hartnett's character had read acting books but none of them were recent ones so he was going off out of date, decades old guides.
  12. RyanSz

    The Wizard (1989)

    Yeah it kind of changed around the turn of the millennium in how people viewed video games I feel. My parents would play everything from Mario Kart to Goldeneye with me on the N64, but then stopped when it came to playing the Playstation as they felt there were too many buttons, which is nuts considering what the N64 controller looked like. It's not like the cost of playing a home console was the reason people turned their noses at gaming, as everything has basically stayed the same price since the 80s, and is actually cheaper today if you consider inflation. I wonder if it's more to do with the growth of things like eSports or streaming that has caused people to treat gaming as an entertainment outlet akin to how horror movies were treated in terms of cinema during the 80s and 90s.
  13. RyanSz

    Hollywood Homicide (2003)

    It seems like there were re-writes for this and the final writer lost his mind trying to tie up every storyline. Also it's amazing that even after his horrible performance in this, Hartnett was the lead choice for Superman in Superman Returns, only for him to turn it down. Just imagine the level of HDTGM that movie could have been with him in the role.
  14. RyanSz

    America's Sweethearts (2001)

    This is definitely one of those movies where everyone involved is too far into the woods to see the trees, which happens a lot with these type of inside the Hollywood machine films. They either are so inside that no one gives a crap about anything happening within them (What Just Happened, Burn Hollywood Burn, among others) or they are parodies that make light of the reality and how absurd it actually is (Tropic Thunder, Last Action Hero, Entourage to an extent) but this kinda slumps in the middle because it's about probably the most mundane thing about making a movie, the press junket. It doesn't help that Zeta-Jones is completely unlikable in this film so the audience has no reason to root for Cusack to want to get back with her and Crystal is at times a genius at building anticipation for the movie and at others a complete idiot in trying to keep the train on the tracks so that the junket is a success. Then you have Walken who breaks so many laws in making his movie that even John Landis would say "hey dude that's too far," but it's okay because he's the kooky guy who bought the Unabomber's shack and now lives in it, and this movie is glorious clusterfuck.
  15. RyanSz

    Dead Heat (1988)

    I watched it recently on Amazon though I can't recall if that was because I have Shudder or if it's on Prime as well.
  16. RyanSz

    Episode 247 - 2:22 (Live in Portland)

    I wonder if there is something more to the tossing of the trays that was either cut from the movie or just not explained because it also seemed wasteful to me, though I thought perhaps someone else was taking the papers out and restocking the trays later. I also noticed that Teresa ended every single one of her texts to Dylan with 'xxx" which I have never seen in a movie outside of a person who is having an affair, only for their significant other to find the text on their phone. As for Jonas' intentions at the end, I do think he had the intention of killing Teresa as a backup plan, which is why Dylan had to go to the train station to stop it from happening. It's clear to me that Jonas, who I though was played by mumble-horror mainstay Joe Swanberg for half of the movie, also knew he was a reincarnation as he was stalking Teresa with his whole mega-apartment being filled with portraits of her and that collage of headshots of hers, and saying things like how he hopes Dylan realizes how good he has it being with her and other clingy crap. Then when they are at Grand Central, he asks the ticket guy for tickets to that station that has been closed for 30 years, which if I'm that ticket seller I start wondering why multiple people are asking for tickets to a place that hasn't been running in decades. It's at this point Teresa is starting to see the signs as well and realizes that Dylan was right about the connection between them and the victims from 30 years prior, piled onto by Jonas calling her the previous girl's name. So when she starts to push away from him as he's got both hands on either side of her face and is beet red demanding she say she loves him, it's clear the next thing would have been him using that gun on her right then if Dylan hadn't shown up and taken Jonas' attention off of Teresa. And Dylan breaks the cycle of 2:22 by taking the bullet meant for Teresa, which didn't happen in 87 as evident by how piss poor it was explained in the movie. The standoff concluded with the cop killing the pregnant woman, the guy she really loved killed the cop, and the cops killed him and then framed him as a criminal to cover up the fact that this detective just unprovoked murdered a pregnant chick. Also did this movie have the most overt, on-the-nose soundtrack ever? The ballet song was about being alone and finding someone to love, the park dance song had a similar message and if I recall the flashbacks had some overt music.
  17. RyanSz

    Mercury Rising (1998)

    What's more stupid is that the code is a McGuffin and they flagrantly flaunt that fact when anyone tries to explain what the hell it is, they are killed. Yet apparently it's so important that Baldwin and his main lackey will openly try to kill a kid and FBI agents. I can't even imagine what Baldwin's exit strategy for that plan would be as he would instantly become the most wanted man in the country for a list of crimes as long as my arm.
  18. RyanSz

    Enemy of the State (1998)

    What always gets me about this movie is I forget how stacked the cast was with either established stars or people who would become stars soon after its release: Smith, Voigt, Hackman, Regina King, Jack Black, Seth Green, Barry Pepper, Jake Busey, Jamie Kennedy, Lisa Bonet, James Legros, and Tom Sizemore were just a few names of what could easily be the movie with the most HDTGM All-Stars in a single film.
  19. RyanSz

    Episode 246 - Swordfish: LIVE!

    Well to be fair they wouldn't have tried to kill him if it weren't for the dipshit analyst's putting the secret code and phone number for the black bag operation they were working for in a magazine puzzle for shits and giggles. The fact that this code is a McGuffin so important that a top NSA agent would try to murder a child in full view of a team of FBI agents and civilians is all the more infuriating.
  20. RyanSz

    Episode 246 - Swordfish: LIVE!

    Oh he could easily pull an Alec Balwdin and have a career revival with the right show, doesn't matter if it's a comedy or a drama. Him in a show akin to Breaking Bad or Ozark could be fantastic especially with how he's done those types of roles in the past. The Cop Out situation was an additional bummer in that basically everyone else involved wanted to do the movie because of his involvement and he was a shit about the whole thing. Kevin Smith at least took a good bit of credit in that movie's failure but listening to him discuss how elated he felt to know Willis was on board for the movie after the great time they had working together on Live Free or Die Hard, only for Willis to do a complete 180, along with how the whole ordeal impacted Smith where he was mentally at the time, is just another one of those examples of never meeting you're heroes because you'll just be disappointed.
  21. RyanSz

    Virus (1999)

    It's based on a Dark Horse comic that was originally written as a screenplay in the early 90s, but when the writer realized that current effects wouldn't have been able to match his ideas and visuals, he sold it to Dark Horse to be turned into a comic. And given that the series was only 4 issues shows how barebones the screenplay had to have been.
  22. RyanSz

    Episode 246 - Swordfish: LIVE!

    The original Death Wish worked in that it grounded itself in the reality of the times where there was a large uptick in crime around the country, especially in metropolitan areas like New York City where the film is set and while the film and its eventual sequels embraced the vigilante violence, the book it was based on had the theme of it being completely wrong and to let proper criminal justice work. Willis' version started off on the wrong foot from the first trailer, which went from him looking kind of depressed after his family is attacked, to blaring "Back In Black" by AC/DC and him popping of one-liners and laughing with his therapist while he's a trap setting crime fighter at night with zero training or prep, creating the wrong kind of tone to associate with the movie. I have to assume his firing from Expendables 3 was what soured him for a lot of the bigger studios as after that happened, the only movies that he was in that went to theaters were either sequels to movies he had done (Sin City 2, Split & Glass), a tiny cameo in the second Lego Movie, Rock the Kasbah, Motherless Brooklyn, and Death Wish, with Death Wish being the only non-sequel he was the lead in. Outside of those he's done SEVENTEEN movies that are direct-to-home, four of which are set to come out soon. And it is unfortunate as you're right he is great in a mentor/elder statesman role, but his reputation for standing in the way of himself these last few years has really brought him down to doing some utterly horrible movies.
  23. RyanSz

    Episode 246 - Swordfish: LIVE!

    Yeah Seagal even at his peak of Hard To Kill and Under Siege was fit in the way a doughy guy went to the gym a couple days a week a few weeks before they started shooting, and while he could stand out in that he had skill as a martial artist, his acting was probably the worst of the group. Then you look at his career since On Deadly Ground/Fire Down Below and it's clear he took a page out of Marlon Brando's book and thought "I can still do movies and just sit down for everything," not realizing that as an action star that that really isn't a viable option. Also when I just looked at his IMDB I saw that for some reason and some how they are making a sequel 30 years later to Above the Law which is mind boggling as it's not his biggest movie and he is nowhere near the shape he was in when he did that movie back in 88.
  24. RyanSz

    Episode 246 - Swordfish: LIVE!

    It reminds me of the various jokes Family Guy did about old tough guys like Robert Mitchum and Joe Pesci and how antiquated they would be in modern definition of the term. While Willis wasn't what Steven Segal would become in the 90s in terms of body type, he had the unfortunate fact of being an action star in the time of Arnold, Stallone, Lundgren, Van Dam, and even Gibson. His saving grace was similar to Gibson in that they had legit acting abilities and were allowed to showcase them, while guys like Stallone and Arnold have only been able to really do so now in some of their more recent roles. Unfortunately the crossover success in an action star who could actually act was he gained an ego from it which has utterly ruined him for the last 15 years. Especially in a time when action stars now are usually leaner or muscular but not exaggerated like the stars of the 80s, a guy like Willis would be either a parody character or he'd be that guy you see on the cover a bunch of C-grade action DVDs that you kinda recognize but never really remember.
  25. RyanSz

    Episode 246 - Swordfish: LIVE!

    I've enjoyed Cusack in various things over the last 20 years like Con Air, Grosse Pointe Blank, and even Identity, but it seems like whenever a pitch is brought to him he's told the character that he'd be playing along with motivations and emotions behind them and his only response every time is "and he's on quaaludes right?" As for Willis, I've said in this forum before that the only time he's really tried in the last 15 years were in movies that either had Red or Die Hard in the title, and everything else he just phoned in. Looper is the one outlier as it does come off as a genuine performance from him but after the fallout from Cop Out and how he was canned from The Expendables 3, he's been almost completely straight-to-video, which is kind of sad considering he was a top leading man for the prior 25 years. Hell even when he gets a theatrical release it's like he can't remember how to do it, as in Death Wish he was basically mugging and laughing into the camera when his character is supposed to be a depressed vigilante hunting the people who killed his family members.
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