Asteck

Would you be willing to do a judged Case Closed on Case Closed and be done with it? If you win, people have to stop harping about it and do what they've had the option of doing this whole time: take two GD seconds and skip that portion of the show. If you lose, retire the segment. I'm sure one of the more outspoken forum members would be willing to volunteer to debate you.

There's so much sarcasm... I can't tell what's real anymore. Van Der Beek Rules sounds like too good of a show to be fake... and it would go so well beside "Undercover Ross," an idea I've been working on for a Schwimmer based reality show.

Thank you for your sweet, sincere laughter. The notion that you not only took the effort to record the amount of “ha’s” you bellowed, but that you also accurately reflected them on these forums has moved me [wipes away tear]. I feel indebted to you and will aid you through any means available to bring this monstrous child molester to justice. Clearly this was an event that shattered young Sean, turning him from a sweet, naïve boy into the cold, humorless podcast host we now know. Otherwise, why would he have left us so many clues? We know she is in England and has children (who she probably molests). That narrows it down. I’ll get in contact with some resources I have over there, but in the meantime, please do not allow yourself to lose any more sleep over this matter. You have my word – Justice will be served.

Sean left out the part of the story where he had trouble getting back into America because they wouldn't let him get all of the high-fives he'd accumulated through customs.

I think I remember that. If I recall correctly, it ended with them failing so miserably at mining the gold that they just decide to spend the rest of their money on buying some. They buy a big bar from some gangsters for like half as much as it was worth and then - just as the guy is perfecting the “See honey, I told you spending all of our money on a gold mining venture in Africa was a good idea” speech he was going lay on his wife later - the gangsters run them off the road and steal the gold back. Leaving them with no money and no gold. Honestly, the show was so boring that I only watched that last episode.

Was the show Sean was bad-mouthing the Discovery Channel program Gold Rush? If so, he is WAY off base in regards to its quality. Hands down, Gold Rush is the funniest dramatic reality show on tv. It’s about a guy Todd Hoffman, who has a degree in religious studies, convincing a bunch of his friends to drop their lives and try to get rich in Alaska. None of them have mining experience and Todd can’t make a good decision to save his life. It is literally episode after episode of Todd making a bad decision, a crucial part of their operation breaking, or somebody getting hurt. Just one crippling disappointment after another. If you ever feel shitty about your life or a decision you’ve made, just watch an episode of Gold Rush and thank god you’re not Todd. On RW, I feel like it would be impossible to describe that scene between Nia and Jordan in a remotely believable manner to somebody who hadn’t seen it. The details just get weirder and weirder. “Yeah so she said she wanted to suck the skin off his dick… then she said she wanted everybody to watch…then she went outside for some reason… and took off her shirt… and crawled back in through a window…” Also, a person died on the Chinese version of Splash. Her non-corporeal essence whispered “totally worth it” as she drifted from the watery mortal realm.

Ok, I downloaded iTunes specifically to rate/review this show, as well as my other all time fave, the reality SHOW show. Like many others, this is my Thursday go-to, and I would be super sad to see it go. Don't worry, my review didn't undermine the integrity of this show. I specifically noted that it isn't for the main stream and mainly focuses on sound and imaginary movement based improv. Jokes aside, I wonder if a way to bring in more outside listeners, who may not be aware of how "normal" improv has evolved since the 90's, would be to have a special, maybe once a month, celebrity monologist? People could tweet questions for them and they could tell stories that fans may not regularly get to hear. Then they could promote the show through their twitter, which would hopefully attract a much broader audience. Aahh I think I asked my question about Zach and Veep after this was recorded, but I wish I could get an answer! I want to take off my tinfoil tv-casting conspiracy hat. It's so sad when he doesn't have plugs; he should seriously be famous already!

I don’t see what the big deal with the “sex talk” is. They told you that they just watched Ready For Love. All ANYBODY coming down from an experience so filled with sincere romance and sexual energy like watching an episode of that would want to do is talk about sex. If you want to lure Cochran onto the show, you’ve got to appeal to the biggest organ on his body: his nose. I mentioned it a while ago, but he was well known like nine years ago for having one of the grossest noses on the internet. I can’t find the original pictures, but I did find a .gif of it healing, and an image of it photoshopped onto a strawberry. Keep it classy brutha

Oh man! What are the visions for the future? There have been rumors that a second theatre has been purchased in LA. I know the UCB East theatre tried to be more inclusive to the stand-up community in New York; if there’s a second theatre in LA, what will the goals for it be? How was the process of purchasing and renovating it compared to New York? Are there any plans to increase accessibility to the rest of the country? I know it’s kind of been held that improv is best experienced live, but I feel like I4H disproves that. ASSSSCAT was recorded for a while (and anybody who likes this show should listen to those), would it be possible to start a UCB podcast network with different teams performing audio only improv? This could even include sketch teams and it would give a chance for people outside of LA and New York to get to experience the different players. I hope this isn’t sacrilegious asking this on an Earwolf forum. What are the current roles of the UCB four in the theatres now? On episode 58, Ian Roberts made it seem like you’d all left them in good hands and just come around once in a while to check on things or to try out a show. Anything about the history where you might pause and go “That’s too inside baseball, my listeners might not understand that.” What were those Road Rules people really like?

Since Veep was your sponsor this week and some of the show was dedicated to discussing casting, I was hoping I could ask a question about one of your frequent guests that you may be able to present to him next time he’s on. It’s for Zach Woods regarding the role of Jonah the White House aid on Veep. Jonah is incredibly similar, if not exactly the same in every way, to the character Zach played on In the Loop, Chad. Since Veep is essentially In the Loop for t.v. (same writers, director) and Anna Chlumsky was able to parlay the new version of the character she played on In the Loop to Veep, I’m just wondering what happened with Zach. The guy who plays Jonah is doing a fine job, but I’m a huge fan of Zach Woods and would much rather see him on there. I know there are instances where a role will be written specifically for somebody, but the network decides to go with somebody else. Was this one of those? If it’s a sore spot, or un-kosher to essentially ask “hey why didn’t you get that part” I understand. The characters just seem too similar to be a coincidence and, in my opinion, he nailed it in In the Loop, so I’m dying to know what happened! Who made the terrible call not to go with him? Anyways, if it’s an interesting story, maybe you guys could do a scene off of it. Also, if sucking up helps, I’m more than willing to say that I watched Veep because of I4H. I’d been meaning to watch it already, but it was the testimony after the first time they sponsored you that sealed the deal.

Yeah Alton! Ha, Jess is so far below 5'11 that until last night I totally forgot she was on the cast and got the number of roommates wrong! Man, last night's episode was a doozy.

I think you have to try to take things from Anastasia’s perspective. See, she used to be just a nerdy girl in high school and only “blossomed” or “booked a modeling gig and realized that the way you look can dictate how you treat people” when she was nineteen. That was only three years ago! She’s practically a newborn. So when it comes to super common situations like inviting five girls to come home with you so you can insult them and immediately tell them to leave, she doesn’t know how to react. She missed that part of high school. She was just a nerdy girl doing nerdy things like flying quadrocopters through hoops and crying when she’s asked to explain who created Pong. On top of that, there was something “off” about Jordan. Everybody knows that the height of a woman dictates how intimidating men find them. Heck, it’s one of the first things Joi brings up, stating that “guys find her intimidating because she’s 5’ 9 which is tall for an Asian girl.” Anastasia’s 5’11 and when she puts on heals, that’s off the charts intimidating. I don’t know about you guys, but when she came on the screen, I had to turn on all the lights in my apartment, hide under a blanket and look up how tv’s work to make sure she couldn’t “get” me. Poor Averey is so short and un-intimidating that the cameras can barely pick up her image. The rest of the cast aren’t even aware she’s living with them This wasn’t the case for Jordan. In fact he seemed to be doing the opposite of what a normal human would do. Anastasia would tell him to stop spilling her drink and instead of obeying, he would dump out more. She had known it would be like this from the start. She knew from her years as a nerdy girl that only one chromosome pair separates humans from apes. And how many chromosomes are there in a finger? I’m not sure, but those things are tiny, so I can safely assume at least three, and Jordan was missing a whole hand’s worth of them! So what did that make him? Maybe somewhere between a dog that could detect cancer or an elephant that knew how to paint, but certainly not human. When Anastasia first met him and spotted that hand she let out a sigh and grumbled “I had to be on that season of the Real World.” “That,” referring to the bold move on MTV’s part to cast FIVE strangers, instead of the usual seven, and two animals to fill in the rest. It was a controversial choice, but left alone, there weren’t many opportunities for drama with Daisy. Anastasia’s just not the kind of girl to let that difference in species stop her from speaking her mind. In one of the previews you can see her berating an inebriated Daisy, screaming “I don’t care if she can’t see reds, you don’t treat your roommates that way!” The preview doesn’t really provide any context for the argument. Anyways, you can tell there’s a lot going on with Anastasia, which is why I love to hate her. I also think Jordan is a huge pile of garbage, but that’s just projecting human standards onto him so it’s not really fair. On an off note, the black dude from the first Real World: Las Vegas did that exact same move of just showing his dick to a couple of the girls. So I don’t know if that’s just a common thing or not.

Sadly it’s not Anastasia who’s going home. She’s the one who answers the phone call of Nia saying she’s going to be their new roommate. Oh well, you can tell she’s going to be one of those that you just loooove to hate. Do you remember a few years ago when somebody made those realistic renderings of the Simpsons characters and their exaggerated features made them really grotesque and horrific? I’ve always thought that John Taffer was sort of a living version of one of those if you’d transformed Shrek. I’m all about yelp. A review I wrote about that Togo’s in the Costco parking lot off of Los Feliz was so highly regarded that the owner personally messaged me to thank me. I consider it my greatest achievement since moving to LA with the goal of becoming a writer.

You did great Valerie! I've wanted to call in, but I’m afraid I’ll suffer a similar fate to Ben Rogers’ where I end up mostly apologizing for having just woken up. As for this episode, let me just preface by saying that when I sat down with my family to discuss becoming an active member of The Reality SHOW show’s forums a month ago, I did not know what I was signing up for. I thought I was just going to hear two chilled out bros talk’n about reality tv. Instead, today I thought I was getting a glimpse into the seedy underbelly of the Earwolf Network. Hazing, car keyings; I couldn't believe what I was hearing about some of my favorite podcasts. Then it hit me! None of it was true – these guys are just trying turn us into a couple of prestonsinfields to get in on some of those sweet, controversial I4H Gun Control ep level of comments by having us talk trash about the other shows! Well nice try guys, but you’re just going to have to get comments and fatten your paychecks (I’m guessing podcast hosts get paid by the amount of comments left in their forums) just like every other podcaster: by groveling for them at the end of each show. Otherwise, great show! Happy Birthday Hayes. I realize for this post to remotely make sense you have to be pretty familiar with the goings-ons of the Earwolf forums and it may be insensitive to those who were genuinely upset by that episode and the debate that followed. But seriously it's just a comedy podcast.

No need to give me credit for the 8 to 10 hours spent watching a show about waitresses and bar tenders. In my opinion that was just prudent decision making on your parts. I can’t wait to hear what will be brought up in the discussion. Will you mention how often Andy Cohen uses the term “Chunky sweater”? Or maybe talk about how Stassie’s method for arguing is just saying really awful things and then, when she realizes she’s losing, start crying? I guess we’ll see. Oh, if Stassie is your guest, can you ask her if she had to audition to get that waitressing job? She’s been on two other reality shows and I’ve always wondered how that worked. Same with Jonna on RehabX. Like does their manager come to them and say “I’ve got a gig where you’ll be on tv but… you also have to work full time at this shitty job.” And they’re so desperate for the attention that at the sound of “you’ll be on tv” their hand tenses into the shape of it holding a pen and just starts twitching in the way they would sign a contract. This episode would have been great for the Reality SHOW show SHOW. You could talk about how Sean’s voice became noticeably strained after he brought up Adam Busch, but was able to choke back mentioning how he had a 33% chance of getting his role on Men at Work and could have been the one judging that challenge. Also worth noting was how after Genevieve said Han Luke Picard was offensive you could tell the next thing – no matter what it was – that Genevieve said, he would call offensive. And he did. This is long, but I just wanted to thank you guys for the hours I’m not getting back by getting me into the two shows I’m now watching, but previously had zero interest in: Survivor and The Amazing Race. Hopefully CBS can send you over gift basket of some sort to show their appreciation for the increased viewership. Maybe a Gota buff or ornamental Express Pass or something.

I feel like a kindred reality show spirit to Sean's high school friend, although I think he was a little off by defending the integrity of Bar Rescue. In every g.d. episode one of "the best mixologists in the country" will come in and go on and on about how Smirnoff is a premium brand. Um, can you say sponsorship much? Other than that, our tastes aligned exactly and I think he uncovered a pretty glaring absence in the Reality SHOW Show repertoire - Outside of Top Chef, they don't talk about any other Bravo shows. They're missing out on Vanderpump, they're missing out on Gallery Girls, and don't get me started on Start Up Silicon Valley. I grew up in Silicon Valley and that show- as I assume what being a waitress is like to Vanderpump Rules- was like looking into a mirror of my life. They all have the classic Reality Tv ingredients: People with skills ranging from zero to ordinary getting drunk, being forced to say mean things about each other in confessionals, and one or two of them gets edited to look crazy or villainous. Now that's good tv.

Oh nice, did the Dura-tents do a pretty good job keeping flies off of the buffet? I'm assuming this was some sort of Tank themed wedding.

I liked the live format a lot, although some of the audio quality from the phones were kind of unpleasant. I think my favorite part of the show actually came from the caller who brought up that TEC vest guy from Shark Tank and the bit about him just grabbing a chair and sitting down with them. I looked the guy up to see how he responded to being on the show and he starts with "I know some people think I came off as arrogant..." but by the end he's going off about how they weren't willing to deal with one of their equals! So I guess he really does have some delusions of sharkdeur. I also found out that to appear on Shark Tank you have to give 5% of your business to ABC, so that Copa Di Vino guy has given away 10% of his business and still hasn't made a deal!

Hey guys, I found your show through the Earwolf presents section and I have to say I’m hooked. I’m right there with you with Top Chef and when it comes to Shark Tank- let’s just say on Fridays at nine my girlfriend knows that if she comes to me with some lowball offer like “I want 50% of your attention through 80% of the show” I’m gonna say “I’m out!” I’d never really watched survivor, but caught a bit of the premier and recognized John Cochran, who briefly gathered internet fame about ten years ago for having a gross nose. For anybody who didn’t hear about his nose/11, about ten years ago he had a failed laser surgery to make his nose look less red and the result turned it into what appeared to be a huge moldy strawberry that had been lit on fire. His nose is already kind of gross as it is, but it became so gross that I immediately recognized him and his gross nose after almost a decade. I also really liked the Jonna interview and how we got to glimpse into what some of the perks of living that Hollywood dream are, like getting to watch a show you starred in one day before everyone else. If she’s ever on again, it’d be great to hear about her experience and maybe some behind the scenes dirt on the show Rehab X. Like, did she have to audition to get that bikini waitress job? How much of the Grey Goose vodka delivery action the audience sees on the show is real and how much is scripted? When she left the pool and all of her other customers because some guy told her he would pay her $100.00 to find an iphone charger, did she secretly wish she had gone to college? Anyways, keep up the good work!

The Master Class videos are so good! They all really nailed the exaggerated versions of themselves, but Eva Anderson should be declared a break-out star. She's so funny in these!

I wanted to jump on the Chris Gore hate train so I listened to the interview again before doing something controversial like posting a negative comment on the internet. It seemed worth it considering I was judging somebody I had never heard of on a thirty minute conversation. Saying Chris is a sociopath is pretty farfetched. He mostly seems like he’s just trying to impress Matt. I’ll bet (hope) in person this conversation would seem a lot less self-indulgent. With his do it yourself zines and career as a critic, he reminds me of a talk radio host who’s made his money with his opinions and even if he’s wrong, he can’t BE wrong because that would ruin everything. So when he says something controversial, or in this case kind of offensive, and is wrong, he side-steps and steers the conversation in ways that put him in a positive or high-status light. A moment that really stuck out was when Matt referenced a movie Chris hadn't heard of, Chris immediately tried to reference a movie that Matt hadn't heard of. It was like he was defending his livelihood. And thirty minutes of him trying to feel on top is really obnoxious. Otherwise, It was great to get to hear Matt talk about improv in a way that was both really honest and very spelled out. Also one time I ordered a large iced coffee, but they gave me a treinta and when I returned it the girl sneered and said "Next time just say venti"