YayBeards

Let's spare a thought for all those Hispanics who asked for "21 Jump Street" at Blockbuster but got given the gay porn parody instead.

I don't know why everyone is so worried they'll end up turning into their parents. Having the ability to shape-shift would be awesome!

I used to be horribly addicted to sleeping in at hotels, but then one day I received a wake up call.

I think I've become the "Chandler" of my friends, as no one seems to know my job. What's so confusing about "3D Visual Realty Modeler"?

I know there's a cat on my lap, but all I see is a bomb that I have to disarm properly to avoid getting shrapnel in the nuts.

If you don't have enough friends to cover your cast in signatures, then just try breaking smaller bones!

Pinky & The BrainPinky & The BrainOne is a mouseThe other is also a mouse- My co-worker, trying to sing the Pinky & The Brain theme.

Primary school was a hard time in my life. I was always the last kid picked for the Russian-Roulette team.