therealjayknox

Holy Fuck. Holy FUCK! Miami Connection is quite possibly one of the GREATEST BAD MOVIES EVER MADE!! Bless you Nate V for that! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pGjaKjXiAGw

Seeing that last clip and the hilarious cat tossing - the one tossed underhand right to the her face.. holy fuck that made me laugh out loud!

To be honest, as much as I enjoyed highlights of this Lord of the Rings failure - and the HDTGM comedy destruction - it was in the 'unwatchable' category. Not 'so bad its good' but really just a very bad movie. So I don't really want to see more of his films covered.

Would the one black character be a complex personality or just like a really good friend to the white people who helps them out with advice and sacrifices?

This is a pretty good candidate because Stephen King was golden (I assume the book/short story was a best seller) and I actually remember this was a fairly mainstream and well marketed film, yet, It was astonishingly bad. I mean it's just awful. full of bad acting, stupid ideas, poorly directed, stupidity like a corn cob through the spine. But i also recall a lot of 'nothing happening' scenes and that 'face changing' scene was nearly the only exciting special effects moment? Wow what a bad movie!

Agree with the majority here - Tremors was a deliberate retrovision of old B-Movies and I think they did a helluva good job all-around and overall some respectable direction, acting, writing. good humor.. all in all pretty good job!

Don't forget Anna Faris is the 'ugly duckling' who's all awkward and can't quite get a date. She wears 'nerd glasses' and often has messy hair tied into a 'bun'. She kinda wishes she could be just like SJP but ohhhh gosh darn.. lets face it.. I'm a loser! derrrp **One of the feel-good twists is that Anna Faris' character discovers she's a real beauty too as more Chikan men sperm on her than any other bridesmaid in the train! Sorry i'm a new scriptwriter so you guys really need to do the heavy-lifting here - I'm just throwing this in the air to get the table started. *David Cross plays a CGI Squirrel that says crazy stuff like 'FUCkkkkk Your Church!' and 'Dick Cheney my fucknnn asshole!'.

HDHDTGMGM does sound like an awesome segment in an anniversary edition minisode!

I barely hang with the truly funny fuckers on this board but I do have this kooky idea for a movie. Apparently one 'pitches a treatment': So there is this hot chick (Sarah Jessica Parker) who's getting married to this guy Nick. I don't know who plays nick but its that guy from 'Northern Exposure' or any guy with long hair and those quarter-length urban-woodsman jackets. he's an architect or something. Anyways, the hot chick hires this wedding planner who is always the planner but sighs she will never get married herself since shes just too silly and not as pretty. (Ana Farris). despite being the ugly duckling - Ana Farris, through hapless luck and flaw finally coordinates SJPs zany group of gal pals including a fat friend who often shits herself (hilarious!) or vomits on everyone or farts like a trucker. Crazy fat chicks! Her and other white Bridesmaids decide to take on the town, however, madcap trouble ensues when ditzy planner Ana Farris arranges the wrong train to the downtown staggette - a Japanese Chikan train! For the last 40 minutes, Japanese businessmen take turns rubbing their wieners on the girls dresses, eventually groping their clothes off and finally, for some reason, getting them pregnant WOOPS! Ah-So sorry! Anyways, just throwing it out there as a skeleton - I have no doubt you guys would be able to craft and fill with zingers and punch it up too. *totally open to having the Slap-Chop-UR-Nuts guy in on this as a partner.

Mel C showed up in my city (post-Spice girls) and was entirely shocked when a large and enthusiastic section of her audience was not teenage girls but 20-30 year old men infatuated with her. One held a sign 'Marry Me Mel!'. It made the local paper. She has a 'Sandra Bullock' quality.

1. I suggest to the jury that several Spice Girls songs are actually fairly respectable and well-crafted. 2. Nipple Spice (my homegirl, sporty spice, Mel C) became a pretty damn good singer with some respectable hits. 3. I remember seeing this and ... wait.. is that Mark McKinney? yes it is! 4. There is a documentary about the movie about a documentary err here it is: 5. Yes, I did go to see this movie and yes I was younger and holding out all hope I would see some sweet T&A (thats what we called tits and ass back in the day). 6. Surprisingly watchable even if its seemed like they shot this and canned it in the space of a week.

By lacking the same power, I explain it like this: I recall (fading memory) but a scene in Videodrome has Woods viewing what appears to be a woman being murdered. It's grainy and OH SHIT! He's shocked and I think he even smashed the TV off in shock and horror. Later, I think he is massively relieved to learn it was fake. That scene scared the hell out of me as a teenager! Just the disturbing idea someone would even create a fake 'snuff' video or imagine it was real! At work I saw a couple of teens, including a girl, watching a video of what was definitely not a fake 'Syria execution' clip on an iphone. The casual nature, the 'joshing' comments and 'whoa that's fuckn brutal!' and another said "thats nothing.. theres one where they pull this guys arms apart using trucks". It was nothing to them. So I would have to imagine that videodrome scene would have very little power to them if they saw it today.

Sorry to hear that because I actually made a point (needlessly?) of rewinding that scene and taking dictation right onto this page. It's even funnier seeing Woods in this scene. I think he takes both hands off the wheel to gesture how "You wanna put a garlic necklace around your neck?" BTW: easily gets my vote for most mandatory HDTGM episode. Just a fantastic trainwreck of stupid nonsense in Vampires woot

Trust Jarry on this one - you want to rent 'Ted' for all the Flash Gordon greatness. Hey.. the Condorman trailer gave me a massive childhood flashback. I love about 1:00 into the clip the crowd is BARELY acknowledging the suitcase beating taking place in front of them. Only thing with Condorman (as far as a nominee) - it was a deliberate goof on superhero and spy movies. so its kinda hard to knock them.

Just reading that information made me want to punch my computer monitor square in the face!

Gene Hackman, Margot Kidder, Jackie Cooper, John Cryer... hey these are good actors right so it can't be so bad... hmm Mark Pillow? Ok well lets ... is this a joke movie.. wow this is horrible.. oh 'Golan Globus' just explained a lot. If you ask me this is what HDTGM is really all about. It's a 'given' the movie is absolutely horrible, clearly went wrong, under-achieved, but, this is where the real question (the premise of the show) comes up - Okay.. we know its an epic flop but how the hell did this movie get made? Can someone just explain what nightmarish contract forced these actors to do this? Was this Jon Cryers' 'paying dues'? Did nobody stop and think plugging a volcano is going to unleash worse natural disasters in the region?

What in the living fuck did I just surf through?? update: "Urban Outfitters was bankrupt within 43 minutes." ...after that - I regret nothing!

I think it's a fair discussion. Cronenberg does seem to deliberately create these B-movie-on-purpose worlds. I always think John Carpenter does this too. And then I wonder if those guys are wanting to emulate Kubrich. But I think its fair because I often wonder if Cronenberg really is some clever fella making these surreal worlds... or wait.. is it really just plain amateurish and yes its just low-budget and bad? And another issue here - Videodrome just cannot have the same power in today's context. Which says a lot. (and was it prophetic?) This wasn't just pre-internet but really this was the introduction of 'private viewing' era. VHS (hell.. betamax). I don't think it works as an HDTGM, but, I don't balk at the suggestion. I don't know what balk means anymore. Is that right? Now.. any super film geeks looking for a real wacko vintage Canadian horror movie might try and find: Black Christmas. SCTV's Andrea Martin. Margot Kidder. A creepy phone call that for some reason scared the shlt out of us as kids and I swear Eugene Levy was in this movie even though I don't see it listed on IMDB (if you see Eugene Levy in the movie please tell me).

Holy shit this is MUCH WORSE than I remember - so much more enjoyable now! Woods giving the Priest the no-bullshit reality of vampires lesson: "Have you ever even seen a vampire??" - New Priest: "No" James Woods: "Well first of all the aren't 'romantic' - its not like they are a bunch of eurofags hopping around in *rented formal wear seducing everyone in sight with cheezy euro-trash accents Forget what you saw in the movies!! "..They don't turn into bats, crosses don't work. Garlic? you put a fuck'n garlic necklace around your neck and one of those suckers will bend you over and take a walk up your strata-jacka-gotda-wally-sucka the blood out of you!!" "..and they don't sleep in a coffin lined with taffeta! -You wanna kill one of these suckers? You drive a wooden stake right through its fuckin heart!...oh ya and sunlight turns em into crispy critters" 'Got it?" I cannot overemphasize how hilariously stupid and wonderfully bad this is to watch again!

oh no lol! I just remember thinking it was one of those early little Windows 95 midi-keyboard programs. I mean literally your keyboard keys became your 'piano keys' and our teacher was dicking around like he made little songs. So with that in mind - this movie almost seems like Carpenters 'Star Wars Prequels' where nobody around him seemed to be available to say "Dude.. i know you made cult classics but John... no, this movie (and your 'soundtrack') is REALLY BAD. I mean its horrible! Lando wrote: "From what I remember about this movie is that Daniel Baldwin's character is always eating something until he becomes a vampire." I swear I haven't seen this movie in 10 years and yet I am absolutely sure you are right about that, and, I also remember his character was a massive and violent.. basically a psychopath and violent bastard and I think possibly beat up female team members? But the other humans seem to accept this or ignore it. In a way that wasn't how any actual humans would react (or not react to). Okay.. I definitely have to watch this again because I wonder if its really as bad as I remember it?

I hate to say it here but.. Prometheus worked for me. Probably not a great or profound movie but the special effects, tone and look and feel worked for me.

I remember enjoying the movie but thinking it missed some good opportunities and had a few dumb moments or fails. Otherwise a kind of mid-budget superhero movie. Remembered that I liked the old school literary character angle but I think that was lost on a lot of viewers. Also I hate movies that are constantly in the dark, night, dark and rainy, darkly lit-rooms.

Holy shit you guys RULE lol

Holy Eff you are absolutely right - John Carpenters Vampires is probably one of THE WORST movies ever made! And yes it is full of sheer stupidity, WTF moments and just awesome badness and is everything the HDTGM guys would ever want! *I STILL remember the soundtrack.. sounding like an older dude who was dicking around with 'midi compositions' oh gad.. and the movie had that Baldwin everyone hates.

HDTGM Episode 40, 15.45 the great June DIane Raphael's 'Spaghetti Robot' remains one of the all-time greatest moments of ANY podcast anywhere. I can be driving home from work and out of nowhere think of that - and start laughing out loud.