greazey_bob

which will no doubt be having satiated your intense hunger for thirst, root beer slushee. Yes officer, I have been drink

to all my 80s ladies from Hades let's vaccinize some rabies babies. Dog U the man, U the man-dog. U hound of the baskervilles, stop eating my neck

Trying to enjoy this diet cocaine, Spokane as fuck

We've adopted a new stance on constipation. It's kinda like, left foot forward, right foot back, nose to the Blarney Stone, you sunk my battleshit

Kick drum wisdom, trial and strife. Prism jism suck this knife

Half the drama of junior high, with all the calories of habitual cupcake envy. We like to eat stuff round here

When you wash your car and then the apocalypse happens, AND it's your birthday

Mind if I try out some new material on you? Here's a soft leather strap, Ooo. Here's a sturdy oak rod, oh okay. Here's some 220 grit sandpaper, nice right? Now you do me

any french press is good french press

Does the tar pit match the crêpes? Yes it does & thus thou art a horrid chef

!!

when life gives you lemons, make a big ol fuss & kick & scream about how for once it'd be nice to get oranges

cuz your moms on the rag

When you got all your snacks for the day, but then you buy more snacks. Snack world problems

I'm not trying to sound like an asshole, but poop poop fart fart diarrhea

The charm of a Russian mobster with the fashion sense of a colorblind gothic teen. Such was Marty Sheen

we aren't ones to brag, but we are two to tango, now tell us we will die like dogs

i come from a long line of liberal leaning latvian lasso lovers. we've waited nearly nine hours. have you any clue when the pumpkins due?

Now don't try this at Home Depot, they have a strict zero tolerance policy on oil fires

I am middle class ass fuck

Eh, too much pomp, not enough circumstance

the well runs fine on 87 ethanol, the supercharger drinks virgin blood like a lycanthrope

All in all, Alan Alda was awfully tall. Lo & behold, Lauren Bacall had farts of gold

Don't write erotic fiction, despite exotic diction, & mild despotic symptoms. It just isn't worth it long term

Social butterfly, reclusive moth: these & other names that will really confuse your step dad, today on episode of podcast