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Posts posted by Kaminski

  1. OK y'all, I was 1/3 of the way through this (you know when they actually reveal some point to the movie) and I thought, "What about the matrix??"


    The Jean Claude Van Damme Review Matrix (JCVD-RM)


    1.Who is he? Frank Dux Christopher Dubois, American martial arts expert

    2.Which family member/friend must be avenged? Siam's fighter, you know, the fighter you barely remember from minute 24.

    3.Does he take his shirt off? Not as much as Quest

    4.Does he have sex with a C-List actress? NO!

    5.Is there a tournament? Yes, secret tournament for a golden dragon.

    6.Is training needed for this tournament? No...he's already awesome

    7.Does he do the splits in training or in the tournament? NO!

    8.Does he punch someone in the balls? NO!

    9.Does he do a series of flying or 360 kicks? NO!

    10.Is his enemy unbeatable? KHAN!!!!!! (Mongolia)

    11.Does he overcome an injury or other hindrance? Nope

    12.Does he win? You know it!

  2. Just out of my own curiosity (potential spoilers for those that have not seen this film yet) did anybody here actually have an electric carver? My family never had one nor did anybody else I knew growing up. After seeing this movie I remember asking my father why don't we have one, and he told me it was because a real man knows how to use a knife.

    Maybe it was a regional or generational thing but I was always fascinated by it.


    My mid western family was the same way, so I had never used one. But I dated a girl whose father used one and I was quite impressed with how easy and quick it was!


    I have never used ones though.

    • Like 2

  3. Legal Omission!


    1. Jupiter gains title to the Earth and owns it. But somehow Balem can steal her family with impunity? If your mom deeded her house to you, your brother can't go in and start ripping out the copper pipes. Where are the space police? Why won't they intercede?


    2. What kind of crazy laws do they have that title can change if someone shows up in the future? Again, your mom dies. [sorry mom]. Her will says, "I leave everything to Balem... unless my clone shows up someday." How could this ever work? Either Balem holds it in Trust for the future self, in which case he NEVER really owned the Earth. Or their legal system makes no sense and you can lose your property if the genetic lottery produces a reoccurrence.


    3.) Why does Balem get anything at all? If you murder someone in the US, you lose the right to benefit from their estate.


    Regular Omission:

    I hated how they kept talking to Jupiter like she was a reincarnation of the Mom. It was just a genetic match with mom, it doesn't mean Jupiter remembers Balem killing a completely different person.

    • Like 1

  4. 2 things:


    - I have a real problem with the whole harvesting humanity thing. the Abrasax family seed the earth with humans and then just wait a hundred thousand years or so to harvest? there are around 7 billion people alive on earth right now, but it’s estimated that 108 billion people have lived and died. thats 101 billion people that they didn’t get to turn into fountain of youth goo, and an unimaginable fortune that they’re just ignoring. shouldn't these planets be set up like actual farms and just process humans once they reach a certain age? or why not harvest the planet after a certain amount of time - like every 100 or 1,000 years or whatever - and then re-seed it, harvest again and repeat? and shouldn’t the abrasax family intervene in the major events of humanity by preventing wars, disease, and pollution so that their products don’t kill each other off and are nice and healthy when they process them?



    They stated that Earth was just now entering its "Genetic Age" where presumably the genes were good enough to bottle.


    As a side note, its well known that 108 humans go in one bottle of soylent water. But if you grab some middle ages people... whew you'll be bottling all day long its more like 250 / bottle. And really it doesn't work as well =D

  5. My god, I thought when Wolfie said "I want to get my wings back," he meant pilot wings... Jokes on me.


    I agree the audio is all over the place, they are either mumbling through dialog or action scenes are blowing out my speakers.


    I watched it while I cleaned up the kitchen... so the movie wasn't an entire waste =D

    • Like 3



    I think HDTGM found its new patron saint today. We'll start asking whether a movie would have been better with Arnold Stang. Spoiler alert: the answer will always be "yes." Even in this movie- he could have played Zeus as well as his own dead wife.




    Yes! But its not whether he would replace another character... just whether if you added a lovable huckster to the cast, would it make the movie better.

  7. I also liked how after the opening carnage, Travolta goes home to his wife and she is like, "Oh hi."


    Don't you want to talk about the pandemonium thats probably all over the news? A plane just crashed and about 20 people have been killed, and a jet propulsion lab just blew up at the airport. Have your really not heard anything about that?


    Second, when Travolta returns to the office everyone gives him a standing applause. This wasn't a tactical success! Yes they got the Troys but a huge amount of agents lost their lives, you know... the agents who you work with... This isn't the mission that got Osama, its like they nuked LA to take out one guy!


    Stop clapping!


    It makes much more sense when Cavolta disarms the bomb and gets a standing applause. No one died and city is safe.

    • Like 6

  8. Supreme Court justices do not get secret service protection. They may have a US Marshal in DC or local police if they are traveling, but its nothing like the massive secret service detail the president gets.


    Article about it: http://www.nytimes.com/2012/02/19/us/supreme-court-justices-remain-security-exceptions.html?_r=0


    Omission: Cage KILLS the doctor who did the procedure and burns down his high tech secret lab. Yet at the end, some other doctors can just jump in and redevelop the laser face/off procedure and put them back together? I call BS


    The Secret Boot Prison brought up a lot of questions. They say that Castor no longer exists and this is a secret prison that doesn't exist. Yet there are like 300 prisoners in there. Are we to believe that 300+ American Citizens could disappear to secret jail and no one asks questions? No family members say, "hey remember uncle john... he was arrested... and then disapeared. WTF?"


    Great Episode!


    • Like 1

  9. I must confess, I never watch the movies reviewed on HDTGM but normally can pick up what they're about. However listening to this episode, I have no idea what the plot of Zardoz is. Paul, Jason and Brett seem to be making references to things and scene that are beyond my imagination and understanding. I still enjoyed it though, I just don't know what the film was about.


    Depending on the movie I sometimes skip it too (sorry Gooby... not renting you). But I'm SO glad I saw this one. Its like that crappy college art film study your friend made, but instead it was filmed with a real budget / director / actors.

  10. I want a June "director's commentary" where she listens to the podcast and gives her opinions. How is it that June always misses the episodes where she is needed.


    One thing I didn't get was the Senior Center prison. If you are immortal and they age you to an old man, why wouldn't you just press the reset button and kill yourself?

    • Like 5

  11. Happy 100!


    1. Can't believe they didn't talk about the Arnold Baby dream sequence with the creepy CGI head.


    2. IMDB lists Triplets http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2334867/ the end of the trilogy where Eddie Murphy would be the 3rd brother of Arnold and Danny.


    3. If you listen to the Total Recall Autobiography, you can listen to Arnold describe the premises of most of his movies including Junior, easily worth the cost of the book to hear his take on a movie. Paraphrasing it won't do it justice.



    • Like 7