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RyanSz

The Fifth Element (1997)

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Let me say before I start that I absolutely love this movie. It has a great mix of sci-fi, action, and comedy, but I can admit that it is batshit crazy.

 

Here is a quick rundown of what to expect in this movie, Joe Bob Briggs style:

 

1 Luke Perry cameo

1 multicolored elephant alien as a pet

dozens of dead bodies that disappear as if it was a video game

1 blonde penis pompadour

1 platinum blonde Bruce WIllis

2 tit flashes

1 body making machine

1 plastic headed Gary Oldman

1 cockroach bot

dozens of dog mercenaries

3 frozen soldiers

Tiny Lister as the president

2 shapeshifters

i fiery ball of evil

2 sex scenes

 

Let's also not forget that the protagonist and antagonist of the movie, Willis and Oldman, respectively, never actually see each other in the entire movie. And to that matter, they barely know that the other person even exists: Willis only knows of Oldman because he works at his taxi company and Oldman only knows Willis after hearing he won a contest, not that he is the guy who is trying to stop him. I can easily see both Jason and June's heads exploding on this one, especially after how they were during the Spice Girls episode.

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I will only accept this as a candidate if we start the podcast by announcing it as The Greatest Movie of all Time.

 

Seriously though, how could you have left out Chris Tucker as bisexual radio host Ruby Rod? Because wow. And the fact that Jean Paul Gaultier was the costume designer? This movie is crazy in the best possible way.

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I did sort of reference him with the dick pompadour. And I honestly think this movie while everyone was on LSD and watching Star Wars. I also forgot to mention that Milla Jovavich gets upset and doesn't want to save the world after learning what WAR is on her little ship computer; I'm guessing she was fine learning about KILL, MURDER, RAPE, and GENOCIDE.

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****SPOILER******

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Fifth Element is Love. Yep... Love.

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I did sort of reference him with the dick pompadour. And I honestly think this movie while everyone was on LSD and watching Star Wars. I also forgot to mention that Milla Jovavich gets upset and doesn't want to save the world after learning what WAR is on her little ship computer; I'm guessing she was fine learning about KILL, MURDER, RAPE, and GENOCIDE.

 

Ahh dick pompadour. Ok, missed that.

 

It is a fundamentally silly movie, but it is also a massively entertaining movie. I believe I saw this in the theater 4, possibly 5 times. I was going to call it eye candy but it's more like eye drugs, like injecting the LSD directly into your eyeballs.

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Ahh dick pompadour. Ok, missed that.

 

It is a fundamentally silly movie, but it is also a massively entertaining movie. I believe I saw this in the theater 4, possibly 5 times. I was going to call it eye candy but it's more like eye drugs, like injecting the LSD directly into your eyeballs.

 

Agree completely. With all of the crazy things that happen in this movie, one would think that it is a jumbled mess, but it works so well. The editing that connects the various conversations was done very well and created some good comedy and Willis wasn't phoning it in, which can't be said about his roles now that aren't attached to a Die Hard or Expendable film.

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True, Bruce looks like he is having a hell of a time in this, and that's not something you can say for a lot of his modern era work.

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I like the idea of doing movies that are well loved but admittedly crazy

 

Fifth Element is one of my favourite movies, I watch it a few times a year with friends. I'd love to hear them do Goonies as well.

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The Fifth Element is Love. Yep... Love.

Which was some fucking Captain Planet level bullshit.

 

This movie is pretty stupid/entertaining, although it wouldn't really be worth watching without Ruby Rod's scenes. I took a stoner friend of mine to the movie after I'd already seen it once, just for that Chris Tucker bit.

 

Luc Besson wrote this (at least the basic story) when he was 15 or something, which explains the silliness of it. All in all it's not a bad flick, more fun than anything Bruce Willis has slummed it up in the past couple of decades.

 

Also: MULTIPASS.

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Which was some fucking Captain Planet level bullshit.

 

It is kinda a Captain Planet ending since it is the same five elements that make up the hero/weapon.

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Wait, guys,

How have we not talked about the scene where a star wars character sings hip-hopera to platinum blonde Bruce Willis in a tux?

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Wait, guys,

How have we not talked about the scene where a star wars character sings hip-hopera to platinum blonde Bruce Willis in a tux?

 

That was this movie's "My Heart Will Go On." And if you pay attention, the movie had a soundtrack done like most movies at that time, where there would be the huge song on the soundtrack and all of the instrumental tracks would be variations of that song's backing track.

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That was this movie's "My Heart Will Go On." And if you pay attention, the movie had a soundtrack done like most movies at that time, where there would be the huge song on the soundtrack and all of the instrumental tracks would be variations of that song's backing track.

 

The soundtrack to this is actually really cool. It's by Eric Serra, who is a frequent collaborator with Besson and a really excellent composer. He also did The Professional and probably one of the most unique James Bond scores, Goldeneye.

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Oh I had the soundtrack because I loved the Diva song and was hoping for the song that was played during the car chase "Alech Taadi" by Khaled, but it was left off. But the soundtrack was basically the diva song played in different ways for the whole thing.

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I came here to recommend this film as well. I love it, but it has a tendency to go from a 10 to a 2 in record time. It's a yo-yo of inconsistency from effects, set design, wardrobe... Oddly, the most unbelievable piece of wardrobe is Willis's orange wife-beater. Least convincing wife-beater ever! What sort of budgetary decision making is going on when your film can't afford a wife-beater?! "Nah, we'll have someone in wardrobe whip up a wife-beater and save the 50 cents. We already blew through most of the budget on toilet seats for the confusing airport terminal backdrop and desk-drawer elephant animatronic."

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I love this movie because I like to think of this movie and Friday as being in the same universe, so thousands of years in the future, Deebo and Smokey's descendants go on to be huge radio stars and the president.

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I love this movie because I like to think of this movie and Friday as being in the same universe, so thousands of years in the future, Deebo and Smokey's descendants go on to be huge radio stars and the president.

Mind = blown.

 

I need to rewatch this some time; it's been years. This is actually my least favorite Luc Besson film that I have seen; my Mom took me to see The Big Blue as a kid and that made a very strong impression on me. I used to have dolphin dreams for years after that, I still vividly remember a couple of them.

 

Interesting to note, Besson married Jovovich after The Fifth Element, and they then divorced two years later after completing that Joan of Arc film.

 

Seems like Besson's kinda been flopping around in the last decade or so; correct me if I'm wrong. Thinking of the Toys episode, it seems like The Fifth Element definitely falls under the "director's dream project" category.

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I like the fifth element, it's too bad it's not on cable tv at any given time. or that I could find a local stereo shop that has it playing and see it on a large screen. Dam this cruel world.

 

cat & beard- I love the big blue. I wish I could be Jean Reno for one day...I would walk around and talk like enzo. I also like subway, thats a cool movie to watch. it's got Christopher Lambert in it. there is a cable version of this film that has Christopher Lambert doing all the English dubbing for his character. it's like a Clint Eastwood western movie in that he's the only one talking with his own real voice. and the other actors have got some other person doing the dubbing.I remember seeing this on cable.

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Interesting to note, Besson married Jovovich after The Fifth Element, and they then divorced two years later after completing that Joan of Arc film.

 

 

Interestingly enough, his 2nd wife was in The Fifth Element (she's the blue lady) and he apparently started up the affair with Jovovich on set. And just so everyone feels super uncomfortable, he married that same 2nd wife when she was 16 and he was 33. She claims Leon was inspired by their relationship (which started when she was 15). Now if you'll excuse me, I need to vomit.

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Interestingly enough, his 2nd wife was in The Fifth Element (she's the blue lady) and he apparently started up the affair with Jovovich on set. And just so everyone feels super uncomfortable, he married that same 2nd wife when she was 16 and he was 33. She claims Leon was inspired by their relationship (which started when she was 15). Now if you'll excuse me, I need to vomit.

 

Wow.  It's settled, they have to do this film now.  That's all sorts of big badda boom.  Can we talk about Jovovich's improvisational baby-talk?  Or the really unflattering granny panties we are treated to for the first 30 minutes of the film?  She's literally wearing some tape...and granny panties...and a ronald mcdonald die-job.  It's the nightmare anti-boner. I'm begging you HDTGM, pleeayaase hllllllllp, pleeeeyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaasssssssss.

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Wow. It's settled, they have to do this film now. That's all sorts of big badda boom. Can we talk about Jovovich's improvisational baby-talk? Or the really unflattering granny panties we are treated to for the first 30 minutes of the film? She's literally wearing some tape...and granny panties...and a ronald mcdonald die-job. It's the nightmare anti-boner. I'm begging you HDTGM, pleeayaase hllllllllp, pleeeeyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaasssssssss.

 

You and I have a different definition for granny panties. That or your granny was pretty progressive.

 

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"Water flows...fire burns...wind blows...earth...earrr...<passes out>"

 

I've always thought his was clever writing to avoid figuring out what earth does.

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Interestingly enough, his 2nd wife was in The Fifth Element (she's the blue lady) and he apparently started up the affair with Jovovich on set. And just so everyone feels super uncomfortable, he married that same 2nd wife when she was 16 and he was 33. She claims Leon was inspired by their relationship (which started when she was 15). Now if you'll excuse me, I need to vomit.

 

The damned French and their paraphilias.

 

That has to be so fucking uncomfortable for everyone when you are having an affair with someone on set. I never see how those things start up anyway. It only takes about a month or so to shoot a movie. You mean to tell me that your relationship can't last being apart for four weeks?

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Interestingly enough, his 2nd wife was in The Fifth Element (she's the blue lady) and he apparently started up the affair with Jovovich on set. And just so everyone feels super uncomfortable, he married that same 2nd wife when she was 16 and he was 33. She claims Leon was inspired by their relationship (which started when she was 15). Now if you'll excuse me, I need to vomit.

 

So what happened with Jovovich two years later then, she got too old?

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