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ShaneHebert

Corrections & Omissions: Jack Frost

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Somehow you all skipped over the moment of the film where my mind ceased to operate.

 

Do you remember when Jack (the sentient snowdad) and whatever the hell that son was named JUMPED OUT OF THE BACK OF A MOVING VEHICLE! Absenteeism is one thing, but in that moment the "hero" of our story all but pushed his young child out of a vehicle which considering the weather, terrain, and near-certainty that the driver was trying to rush home to be with his family, must still have been going somewhere in the 20-35mph range on that road (at the least). It's one thing for that crystallized bluesman to make the jump. He's practically immortal. But there isn't a moment of hesitation when he ushers what's his name towards what is certain to be the last leap he will ever make. Not even a "tuck and roll, son." If this was his parenting attitude maybe god had the right idea when he killed him one year earlier ON THAT VERY SAME ROAD!

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Where are the Clooney snowmen now? Imagine if George Clooney has a kid and then eight years later the kid starts talking smack about how Clooney's career keeps him away from home all the time and then it's around Christmas and Clooney calls up Warner Brothers and says, "I need to buy one of those Clooney snowman puppets you made for Jack Frost because I just thought of an elaborate but very effective way to teach my kid a lesson."

 

To clarify, the omission was: reckless speculation about what happened to the Clooney snowmen.

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Considering how dark and messed-up the second opinions were that Paul read, I really want to hear what the review was that he omitted for June's benefit.

 

I browsed Amazon's Jack Frost user reviews for a little bit myself, and this was the most disturbing one I found:

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