EPISODE 121 - Perfect: LIVE!

[Blast Hardcheese 636]

They recorded Death Spa at the other show on the same night as Perfect, so we'll likely see it next.

 

Awesome! I can't wait to hear it.

 

Oh, and before I forget to mention it: The workout show from the 80's Paul was trying to remember I believe was called The 20-Minute Workout. It used to come on right after morning G.I. Joe cartoons on the local UHF channel in my hometown (what a combo that programming was!) This workout show even has a cameo in the classic Eddie Murphy/Nick Nolte film 48 Hours (the scene where they bust into the bad guy's girlfriend's apartment looking for info).

[Cockney Mackem 514]

 

Yes, watching the movie after the episode is always good, but in this case, I would say just barely. I mean, while there are crazy elements of the movie, it's not really that crazy. It's just poorly made. As I wrote in the mini-sode thread, this movie feels like you are stuck in the B plot of a much more interesting movie.

 

If anything, this movie actually made me feel bad for Travolta (something I didn't think possible) when I discovered Paul Barresi, the guy on the far right, is the guy who gave an interview to the National Enquirer and basically started the "Travolta is gay" rumors in the early 90's. I researched it further and found this Huffington Post article. That article made me feel horrible for Travolta. To be clear, I don't care if Travolta is gay or not. If he isn't gay, who cares if people think he is? In my opinion, anybody who would think less of another person based on their sexual preference is a person whose opinion means less than nothing--fuck that person. But if it is true, and he is gay, goddamn that's just fucking tragic and breaks my heart that he can't just be himself.

 

 

I was just about to post about Paul Barresi and his claims to have had a relationship with John Travolta.

 

 

But the HDGTM connection doesn't stop there. Barresi was also occasionally employed as a private investigator, and was paid to find dirt on Sylvester Stallone. Later he was paid to look for any information that could be potentially damaging to Arnold Schwarzenegger when he was running for governor.

 

 

 

(You could do a whole movie about this guy and his associate Anthony Pellicano, who is now in jail for illegal wiretaps and firearms offences. Pellicano was embroiled in a lawsuit concerning Steven Seagal's dispute with a reporter, and film director John McTiernan actually went to prison for lying about his relationship with Pellicano.)

[Cockney Mackem 514]

And another strange HDGTM connection in this film: the Roger Daltrey lookalike with the strange groin pants. He only has a few film credits but he went on to become personal trainer to NIC CAGE!

[Cockney Mackem 514]

The team mentioned the Carly Simon and Lauren Hutton cameos, and the editor of Rolling Stone playing himself, but there are some other strange cameos and appearances in Perfect as well.

 

 

Nanette, the owner of Sports Connection who Travolta interviews when he first gets to LA, is playing herself. She is the real life founder and owner of Sports Connection. "Bobby" (the guy with the blonde hair and moustache, woodenly playing the manager of Sports Connection who shows Travolta round) - that's the real manager of Sports Connection.

 

 

And last but not least, one of the women at the birthday party - the one in the conversation about the singles scene at the health club who says some people just go there to work out. I was reading up on this film and I believe that is the real life woman from the original Rolling Stone article who inspired the Linda "Ms Gangbang" character.

[Cockney Mackem 514]

I just can't leave this alone.

 

Of all the extraneous nonsense in this film, I was fascinated by him just showing up in Morocco. But the scene features a belly dancer, so I wondered - since this is another woman in revealing clothes gyrating to music, is she running the local equivalent of an aerobics class, and is that why Travolta's there?

[OoofMaGOOF 348]

I did not watch this movie, so I am completely surprised to find out that there is espionage and a gang bangs in this film.

 

That also reminds me, I am SO glad the whole gang was as confused by the weird trial side plot as I was. I was sick and nearly dozing off in parts of this movie, so I felt like I just missed something.

 

Which brings up a question I'm wondering if someone can answer:

 

So Adam refuses to give up the tapes, is held in contempt of court, and is thrown in jail. The trial finishes, he's released. What about the implication that whatever those tapes held could have changed the verdict?

 

Is it totally normal that if you're held in contempt of court and jailed for not providing requested evidence, you're released as soon as the trial is over?

 

That seems oddly bonkers to me.

 

But then again I don't know nothin' about anything.

[OoofMaGOOF 348]

I just can't leave this alone.

 

Of all the extraneous nonsense in this film, I was fascinated by him just showing up in Morocco. But the scene features a belly dancer, so I wondered - since this is another woman in revealing clothes gyrating to music, is she running the local equivalent of an aerobics class, and is that why Travolta's there?

 

 

MIND BLOWN.

 

That whole plot/scene of him in Morocco felt so out of place and unneeded. This movie is so fucking long as it is, did we really need that too?!

[Cameron H. 23786]

One of the issues I had with the movie is, aside from the fact that many of the Sports Connection (especially Laraine Newman) seemed to be suffering from severe self image issues, I didn't have a ton of sympathy for them once the story is published. Aside from Curtis, Travolta's character is extremely forthright in regard to what his story is going to be about. He asks them explicitly if Health Clubs are the singles bars of the 80's, he requests the numbers of all the couples at the gym, and I believe he even tells the mustachioed guy outright that that is the topic. Not only that, we find out early on that one of the trainers is a fan of Travolta's work and compliments him on his article on Carly Simon! Given that we know his story on Carly Simon was obviously unflattering, and all his questions seem to be seem to be of a superficial nature, should they really be surprised that his story ended up less than complimentary?

 

However, I did love when Travolta is trying to escape the angry trainers at the end and one of the dudes (either ersatz Roger Daltry or "exotic dancer" guy) yells out, "He called me an airhead too!" I just liked that this seems to imply, had the story just called his girlfriend an airhead, he would have been totally cool with it.

[FisterRoboto 7499]

(especially Lorraine Newman)

I'm not sure I know who you're talking about.

[ChunkStyle 1160]

 

 

MIND BLOWN.

 

That whole plot/scene of him in Morocco felt so out of place and unneeded. This movie is so fucking long as it is, did we really need that too?!

 

I believe the whole point of the Morocco scene was to show that Travolta was so upset about his story being re-written that he would immediately abandon the new story he was working on and jump back on a plane to do something about it even though he was half way around the world.

[hypnotizingchickens 1025]

I'm glad that the phrases "post-cum puffy-dick" and "sweaty junk-shove" are now in the HDTGM lexicon...

[Cameron H. 23786]

I'm not sure I know who you're talking about.

 

I'm talking about Lorraine Newman.

 

From Wikipedia:

 

script writer, television producer, and the executive producer of the BBC soap opera EastEnders from 2012 to 2013.^[1] Newman, who has worked on EastEnders for "nearly 20 years", received the role of executive producer when her predecessor stepped down in 2012.

 

Who the fuck did you think I was talking about?

[RyanSz 3140]

I still think the movie with the most complete lack of editing is Birdemic.

[SlidePocket 707]

Hey, how about that random black guy who shows up twice in the movie when he keeps punching John Travolta in the gut over one of the articles regarding someone who was close to that man. I don't know what his problem is with Travolta but since it's been so long since I've last seen the film over three years ago, I couldn't even figure out why!

[FisterRoboto 7499]

 

I'm talking about Lorraine Newman.

 

From Wikipedia:

 

[/size][/font]

 

Who the fuck did you think I was talking about?

LARAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNE NEWWWWWWWWMAAAAAANNNNNNN

 

 

Spelling doesn't matter. I only recognize her when her name is yelled correctly.

 

[Cam Bert 8145]

As stated most everything that you could talk about was talked about in the actual episode. However I just have a few thoughts about the whole Joe McKenzie subplot.

 

It's existence in this "romantic drama" seems very out of place however I have an idea as to why it is there. What if this movie is Aaron Latham's Lady in the Water? For those that haven't seen Lady in the Water the movie's ending is how a writer (played of course by M. Night) is the true hero and his words save the day because he is right despite what evil critics have to say. Basically it's a big F U to all his critics who had turned on him after The Village and about how great and visionary he still is. What does this have to do with Perfect? Well Aaron Latham wrote the screenplay along with the director about an article he wrote in Rolling Stone. John Travolta is basically playing him, and which character in the movie is always right? That's right, Adam Lawrence. His smart article is not understood and gets rewritten, he agonizes over writing trashy articles, he knows more than the editor and other people in the industry, every other reporter is lazy or cruel but not Adam. He is the perfect reporter who is so noble he fights first amendment issues and is hoisted to fame and respect as a result of that and the accompanying article. There are lines about how reporters run the world and control things, and what important people they are. All of this written by a reporter about a character that is a surrogate of himself. The Program wasn't about a sports reporter coming across a football team, and Urban Cowboy wasn't about a reporter stumbling into the country scene. Yet both those movies were written by Aaron Latham based on articles he'd written. So why turn this story into that of the reporterwhen a straight forward story of people meeting at the gym and falling in loved would have worked? Clearly he had something going on in his life and he wanted, nay, needed to show the world how important and powerful reporters and he himself were. Finally, what does any of this have to do with the Joe McKenzie subplot? He wanted to write the perfect reporter, the ideal version of himself, and the Joe McKenzie story means the main character doesn't have to write trash anymore, gets a book deal, gets nationwide respect and fame, and is the bravest reporter ever for standing for some first amendment rights. If there is no Joe McKenzie, then the story is about a sleazy reporter who sleeps around, and eventually falls in love. He's not a great or noble character, and if you are going to put yourself in your movie like M Night did, you best make it your best self.

[babyoilbandit 81]

When I first heard of this film I thought it was the first time I'd heard of it and knew nothing of it. Then when I saw Jamie Lee Curtis in the aerobics gear and it came back to me - there was a rumour about a rumour surrounding this film.

 

The rumour that many people have heard was that Jamie Lee Curtis was born a hermaphrodite and the rumour that I can't even find reference to on google is that the hermaphrodite rumour only came about due to this film because the leotard that Jamie Lee Curtis wears ended up giving her a visible cameltoe and so the producers insisted that she stuff her leotard to prevent this from happening and then people went to see Perfect and saw a crotch bulge and came up with the rumour that she was a hermaphrodite.

 

Apparently google has no record of this rumour - spooky, must be Jamie Lee Curtis's lawyers covering it up.

[Cockney Mackem 514]

One of the issues I had with the movie is, aside from the fact that many of the Sports Connection (especially Lorraine Newman) seemed to be suffering from severe self image issues, I didn't have a ton of sympathy for them once the story is published. Aside from Curtis, Travolta's character is extremely forthright in regard to what his story is going to be about. He asks them explicitly if Health Clubs are the singles bars of the 80's, he requests the numbers of all the couples at the gym, and I believe he even tells the mustachioed guy outright that that is the topic. Not only that, we find out early on that one of the trainers is a fan of Travolta's work and compliments him on his article on Carly Simon! Given that we know his story on Carly Simon was obviously unflattering, and all his questions seem to be seem to be of a superficial nature, should they have been really surprised that his story ended up less than complimentary?

 

However, I did love when Travolta is trying to escape the angry trainers at the end and one of the dudes (either ersatz Roger Daltry or "exotic dancer" guy) yells out, "He called me an airhead too!" I just liked that this seems to imply, had the story just called his girlfriend an airhead, he would have been totally cool with it.

 

It's a fatal flaw that the Mckenzie story was more interesting, significant and dramatic than the shitty aerobics story. It's baffling that (to everyone's point) a film that leaves in all kinds of dull detail will leave out all kinds of more interesting stuff about the Mckenzie piece. On the face of it, it's another Watergate in terms of the government framing its own citizens and awkward questions about the ethics of trading with the Soviet bloc during the Cold War. But it's downplayed so much that even when he's being followed and threatened by faceless government agents, it lacks any sense of drama or suspense.

 

Seems to me a film just about Mckenzie would have been much better, but then you have the problem (like when Travolta did the excellent but hardly seen Blow Out) that people didn't want dark political thrillers. The pitch for the film was all about health clubs, lycra and Travolta sexing it up with Jamie Lee Curtis. Which is in my humble opinion why the director and writer struggled with what to put in and leave out, and the awkward mix of plot.

 

It wouldn't have solved some of the other flaws, like the flat dialogue and the fact that Adam Lawrence writes like a fucking village idiot, but you might have ended up with a pretty decent film if Travolta going to the health club was in some way a cover, a way for him to get close to someone connected with McKenzie. Like maybe this LA health club had a bit of a celeb connection, personal trainers to the stars, or it was another of McKenzie's business ventures.

 

All of a sudden you've got a much more focused plot, and being followed and harassed for details of the story are central plot points. The battles with his editor and the suspicion of Jamie Lee about reporters wouldn't seem like it was forced into the story with a crowbar, and you could put more of a sense of danger and tension into the whole thing. You could still have the aerobics and the social world he encounters, and his ethical dilemma about using them to get a story would actually make sense.

[Cockney Mackem 514]

And another thing. It's a serious problem for this film that the health clubs as singles bars is not in the least contentious. The real life article wasn't either, because half the people featured in the article actually appear in the film so there can't have been any hard feelings. Marilu Henner's character completely sums it up. The old way of meeting people in bars was the sleazy option, and people didn't meet anyone nice and ended up feeling like shit afterwards. Health Clubs so far as you see in this film are a big improvement. People get healthy, make loads of friends and quite a few of them seem to have found relationships that make them happy. Travolta doesn't find any proof of eating disorders, doping, negative behaviour or any of that, apart from the Linda character. But that's just one person, and I suspect a character like that would have had the same issues in the singles bar scene. Surely the problem with her is personal stuff like self esteem and not much at all to do with the health club.

[Servo Academy 16]

"I don't forgive anyone for shitting on California!"

 

And that's exactly why I do shit on California.

[Servo Academy 16]

 

Awesome! I can't wait to hear it.

 

Oh, and before I forget to mention it: The workout show from the 80's Paul was trying to remember I believe was called The 20-Minute Workout. It used to come on right after morning G.I. Joe cartoons on the local UHF channel in my hometown (what a combo that programming was!) This workout show even has a cameo in the classic Eddie Murphy/Nick Nolte film 48 Hours (the scene where they bust into the bad guy's girlfriend's apartment looking for info).

 

 

That's the one. I wanted to yell at my computer "20 Minute Workout, dammit!!"

[Servo Academy 16]

 

Nanette, the owner of Sports Connection who Travolta interviews when he first gets to LA, is playing herself.

 

 

In the words of Crow T. Robot--NOT an actor

[Molly L. 99]

I thought this movie was going to go a different way with the confidential tapes. I thought that, when Jamie Lee Curtis got mad at him for recording their conversation about her and her old swim coach and kicked him out of the car, she was going to steal his tapes, unwittingly finding herself in posession of recordings revealing...something about Mackenzie. Despite Travolta's best efforts to hide the fact that he's lost posession of the tapes, Mackenzie's people (or his enemies, since I guess he was actually not a bad guy?) find out, and CAPTURE Jamie Lee Curtis and then Travolta has to save her.

 

THEN when the stripper's picture was in the magazine, I thought SHE might be in some iminent danger. But nope -- we never revisited her again...I guess I was waiting for something that might tie the romance in with the Mackenzie stuff, or for anything interesting to happen in general. It seemed like him trying so hard to keep the tapes private might pay off in them being stolen, but instead they were there to prove that he's apparently the only journalist in the world with integrity...

[Molly L. 99]

ALSO, as someone who was not around in the 1980s, Jason is right -- I spent most of the movie wondering what was happening and how close to reality the whole health club thing actually was. Especially the outfits; who in their right mind would actually choose those clothes for a workout (or anything, really)?

[souprman 10477]

I decided to post before i read all of the thread - DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.

 

I had some serious doubts like a lot of us about how good an ep the gang could pull out of this static turd-festival, but oh boy I'm so happy how wrong we were. I think this is one of my favorite eps actually. There was a lot of energy for this one that I wasn't feeling as much for the last couple eps, particularly from 'Zouks and June. I was really glad they launched right into the "car chases" because I felt they were the greatest unintentional joke of the film. Rockford Files-esque really.

 

Okay now I'm going to read the thread and like all your posts.

 

edit> had to redact June there after Fister reminded me about her killer garbage people stuff in MOTU.