EPISODE 120 — Brandon Gardner, Our Close Friend

[honlads 8798]

Hi guest,

 

Why do I always push people away? Is it because of my wrestling training and unique ability to reverse any attempt to grapple? I could have gone pro

[Jakal 4475]

Hi,

 

Sean/Hayes/Guest/Norm/AnyOtherPersonOnThisForum

 

Will you be my valentine?

 

No? Oh alright. See ya later.

[apocowarg 2696]

my last relationship ended because the girl said "I spent too much time outside" and "why are you going through my trash" and "wow the homeless situation has gotten real bad here lately"

 

Is it a good or a bad idea fuck a homeless man? He is cute.

 

Oh my...

[honlads 8798]

I'll do it, jack

[Andy Dick Cheney 3779]

Hi,

 

Sean/Hayes/Guest/Norm/AnyOtherPersonOnThisForum

 

Will you be my valentine?

 

No? Oh alright. See ya later.

 

 

Hi Jack

 

I will.

 

You got condoms bro?

[Jack Johnson P.I. 3649]

Hi guest

 

Is Maurice truly the real gangster of love?

[Jakal 4475]

Hi Jack

 

I will.

 

I got a hot date with honlads first, but maybe after

 

 

You got condoms bro?

 

As a matter of fact I have a lifetime supply

[souprman 10477]

ran,

if you're waiting for a scenario where you have to save that hot homeless dude from drowning in a tub of hot soapy water and then bone him down, you're going to have to create that situation yourself. I'm not saying dig a hole in your yard, put in a clawfoot bathtub, cover it with a picnic blanket and then leave a trail of homeless people snacks (cigar's, empty tuna cans, etc) from where he hangs out to the tub and push him in and then "save" him wearing nothing but a fugazi t-shirt... yep, i'm definitely not saying that. good luck.

-soup.

 

edit> to be clear this is NOT what I did and u shouldn't either.

[apocowarg 2696]

hahaha wouldn't it be funny if someone found that sexually arousing for real hahaha that would be so weird hahaha im gonna be in my room doing homework with the door locked be back in 20

[elizamuffins 4228]

Dear Guest,

 

My boyfriend is very good at sex but he doesn't like Red Lobster so how do I show him that I appreciate him? Before you suggest it, I don't have a helicopter.

 

Thanks!

 

Muffins

[Joe Lerini 7329]

Hi Sean and Hayes and guest,

 

I have a crush on a close relative of a couple of my best friends, and I'm worried that if I try anything my entire close circle of friends will hate me for it.

 

Will you guys be my new circle of friends so I can ditch those losers and hook-up with their hot cousin?

[mikebonetti 3718]

Guest,

 

Have you ever considered being "more than" a friend of the podcast? At least a friend with benefits of the podcast?

[mwn 5470]

Dear guest,

 

What am I supposed to do for Valentine's Day now that Antonin Scalia's miserable body has been robbed of its élan vital? He factored heavily into my former plans, which I will not divulge here. Ha ha I'm tying in current events into my question and that's great and good taste. Good stuff from me just kidding. Sorry. Bye

[mwn 5470]

Dear guest,

 

What's kissing like? I've never done it because I'm worried my incredible jaw strength will cause harm to the ones I love. Also I'm still sorry about that last question. Do I deserve forgiveness? I don't think so, sometimes. Sorry. Bye

[AdamKaup 61]

How does sex in a bathtub work?

[Spunky Foonerism 8561]

How does sex in a bathtub work?

 

I think you're supposed to fuck the drain-hole.

 

Edit: shit, was that supposed to be for the guest? sorry for giving away the correct answer.

[FaceLikeThunder 2114]

Hey Montgomery I don't like your plugs theme I think it's shit

 

Zap!

[chanson 9697]

Guest:

 

What do I do for Valentine's day if someone on a podcast said stuff about me being into my dog inappropriately an now no one will date me?

 

What if I want to marry my dog but not in a gross way?

[souprman 10477]

cbxvn

[Shrek & Donkey Kong 4336]

 

I think you're supposed to fuck the drain-hole.

 

Edit: shit, was that supposed to be for the guest? sorry for giving away the correct answer.

 

 

way to ruin the segment

 

 

fuck you, drainhole.

[beeface 1804]

dan savage.. what's the most horned up you ever been and how

[putsome gravyonit 835]

I'm in Chicago.

 

Now what?

 

Still here? Let's hang!

[Lumberjim 364]

Hello guest,

 

I've been having trouble with physical intimacy since one of my oldest friends took his own life six weeks ago. How do I get over my grief and get back to smashing gash?

 

Thank you.

[Lumberjim 364]

Hey Guest,

 

Dating is different now than how it used to be because of phones, and apps, and computer. Any tips for meeting people in the age social media?

 

Thx.

[elizamuffins 4228]

I just posted to say I <3 U