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JulyDiaz

Episode 129.5 - Minisode 129.5

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WHERE ARE ALL THE CHAIRS?!?

Exactly how many chairs did she have in her bedroom to start with?

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Exactly how many chairs did she have in her bedroom to start with?

EVERYONE is asking about those fucking chairs, like she hid EVERY chair in the house or something. I get that she needs to have Brad sit on her bed for the spell to work(?), but it's not like he's going to make her drag a recliner in from the living room because there aren't any chairs in her room. Maybe this happens all the time anyway, like she has this OCD thing where when she has company, she puts all the chairs in the backyard or something, which is why everyone is apparently lined up outside her room and was IMMEDIATELY on her ass about it.

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EVERYONE is asking about those fucking chairs, like she hid EVERY chair in the house or something. I get that she needs to have Brad sit on her bed for the spell to work(?), but it's not like he's going to make her drag a recliner in from the living room because there aren't any chairs in her room. Maybe this happens all the time anyway, like she has this OCD thing where when she has company, she puts all the chairs in the backyard in something, which is why everyone is apparently lined up outside her room and IMMEDIATELY on her ass about it.

 

My favorite part of that scene is that there's clearly a chair right in front of the door (as you walk in) covered in her clothes. I honestly couldn't tell if that was part of the joke or not.

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Where are the chairs, young lady? your going to get it if you don't put on a sweater soon!

 

don't you know it's cold out side!

 

2h4f386.jpg

What the hell was up with all of the trench coats in what looks to be very nice weather. and on a bike more or less.

 

Mind you, I knew a girl like this once before who loved trench coats too, she was french!

 

monique_082012-m-400x300.jpg

 

Did they goto the same school?

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bsneH0mOq-0

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Teen Witch: everyone in this movie overdoes it by at least 20%. It's like the story takes place in a world where everyone is a theater camp kid. All the quirky but homely best friends from the other 80's movies somehow migrated to this movie.

 

This movie makes Disney's High School Musical look like Ordinary People.

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How many "top that" teen witch covers on youtube are there? ohh good god.

 

 

 

 

, this one is maybe the best one.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Question: is this a thing in the states? are there karaoke bars with people having top that competitions?

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The best part of the movie is the look on Brad's face that seems to say "does this old dilapidated house make you as horny as it makes me? Am I the only one who hears that pornosax?"

 

Louise is a monster.

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I wonder if Lin-Manuel Miranda used TOP THAT as the inspiration for any of his Hamilton songs like the 10 Crack Commandments.

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The best part of the movie is the look on Brad's face that seems to say "does this old dilapidated house make you as horny as it makes me? Am I the only one who hears that pornosax?"

 

Louise is a monster.

It's like the house from "It Follows".

 

OR

 

Like I mentioned the other night, the first ten minutes had me thinking "Freddy's Revenge", and holy shit, the entire movie DOES look like one of the lesser Elm Street sequels.

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Teller, or the guy from the history channel? You know who I mean, look it up if you have no clue.

google history channel guy.

 

mug1md.jpg

 

The DJ from the school dance in teen witch, taken with my iphone, sorry. I didn't have the disc.

 

Or Jim (Wan) Kerr the ever so punchable dickhead who fronts Simple Minds?

Art Garfunkel with a thyroid problem?

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Teller, or the guy from the history channel? You know who I mean, look it up if you have no clue.

google history channel guy.

 

mug1md.jpg

 

The DJ from the school dance in teen witch, taken with my iphone, sorry. I didn't have the disc.

Or is it Art Garfunkle? The kids were into him in '89, right?

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Or is it Art Garfunkle? The kids were into him in '89, right?

 

Snap!

Just edited my post there before I saw yours was already up.

So you can claim first dibs on the Garfunkel-a-like.

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I saw The Witch yesterday and now I'm really sad there isn't a scene where Louise steals a baby, bathes in blood, and then dances naked by a fire.

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I know this movie takes place in some unspecified town, but I am wondering has anyone ever been to Salem? I grew up in Plymouth, MA and have been to Salem a dozen or so times. It's a very weird place.

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According to HDTGM's Twitter account, we should get the ep by tomorrow midnight:

 

 

But don't be sad, though! That's only 24 Teen Witch viewings away.

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I would not be surprised to discover that the director of this movie exclusively made premium cable softcore porn before directing this film.

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I would not be surprised to discover that the director of this movie exclusively made premium cable softcore porn before directing this film.

And after...

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According to HDTGM's Twitter account, we should get the ep by tomorrow midnight:

 

https://twitter.com/...794091613290496

 

But don't be sad, though! That's only 24 Teen Witch viewings away.

 

 

Damn and blast!

 

Wait though, does that tomorrow midnight mean tonight in the minutes following 23.59 or Tuesday night in the minutes following 23.59?

 

And is that PMT or whatever you Colonials call the left, earthquakey coast timezone?

Because for me the best case scenario is Tuesday morning breakfast time and the worst is Wednesday morn with my breakfast fry....and that's practically the weekend, dammit!....well you know what I mean.

 

 

With all due respect and affection to Paul, June, Jason and guest and their probably busy and 'putting bread on the table' proper work schedule, can I beg leave to say....

 

 

 

 

 

...6c5728491696ac74f96bf5dbe01283cb.gif

 

 

Yours respectfully and affectionately,

 

 

Impatient in County Down.

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I know this movie takes place in some unspecified town, but I am wondering has anyone ever been to Salem? I grew up in Plymouth, MA and have been to Salem a dozen or so times. It's a very weird place.

 

I have! I went on family vacation when I was in middle school and my most vivid memory is actually of the Pirate Museum in Salem...I also took a history class on witches in college, which was super fun. I wish I remembered more of it, not that it's super relevant to what's going on in this movie, anyway...

 

The one thing I remember pretty well that's almost tangentially related to the movie is a little bit more of a (not actually that great) "fun" fact: back in the 1600s, there was Salem town and Salem Village. A lot of the witch action went down in Salem Village, now Danvers, MA -- it's where the afflicted girls and most of the accused "witches" lived. There was also stuff going down in nearby Andover and Ipswich. The trials (at least most of them, I think) did take place in Salem Town (which is present-day Salem), but my general understanding is that Salem has kind of co-opted the witch trials as mostly their thing to make themselves more of a tourist attraction.

 

Which is a long way of saying that, in modern terms/if you want to get super picky, Louise was probably descended from witches in Salem Village, AKA Danvers.

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I would not be surprised to discover that the director of this movie exclusively made premium cable softcore porn before directing this film.

 

That does not shock me at all, the opening credits, music is pure porn. at one point I thought I had downloaded the wrong film. this was my first viewing of "Teen witch" so now I am walking around the house singing "I want to be the most popular girl!"

Opening credits,.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OVEoCoWM-L8

out of the way bitch's he's mine!

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The movie seems to constantly second-guess how far it wants to take the sexual stuff.

 

Like, when he takes her to his Fuck Shack, and they start going at it, I was like, "Wow, they're really going there, huh?"

 

But nope. They just "kissed."

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So can we expect the next mini ep a week from Wednesday, and then Ep 131 the Thursday after that?

 

Seriously though folks.

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So can we expect the next mini ep a week from Wednesday, and then Ep 131 the Thursday after that?

 

Seriously though folks.

I do hope the mini gets pushed back. Since this ep isn't actually coming out until Wednesday, doing a mini on Friday seems rather quick.

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