Episode 150 - Brett Marcus, Our Engineer Friend from Germany

[Jack Johnson P.I. 3649]

We've witnessed forum history, folks. In ten years you'll all remember where you were when JEFFREYPARTIES took the last episode of Hollywood Handbook down from the wall.

[greggy 15909]

i didnt like the bad post bit at first but then i thought hey if this does turn out to be the last HH thread ever at least we wont miss the forums as much now that it has come to this

[bigmart 80]

What the fuck does that mean? I'm prominent as fuck. I got the pro version in episode 33. You are nothing and I am everything.

 

Jeffery that was NOT a slam I truly meant a different, prominent member. I even liked the bit!

[bigmart 80]

fuck ... fuck

 

Though again do not appreciate the language

[JeffBurtMacklinMarra 6724]

 

Jeffery that was NOT a slam I truly meant a different, prominent member. I even liked the bit!

 

It's ok. Fuck. I was just doing my famous fake anger bit. Fuck.Thank you for the kind words. Fuck.

[Fabio's Socks 1822]

Though experiment - how would the forum react to the same bit rebooted by a prominent poster?

 

I don't know, I think thejjar was pretty prominent even before he did that bit, now he's forum famous

 

(...joke level: Auden)

[honlads 8798]

i once made two (2) posts in a row and my internet was cut off

[Rose_Cream 1246]

JefferyArties

[apocowarg 2696]

Clever strategy to balance your like ratio, Jeffrey. If only you could convert those likes to actual money so you could pay your parents to pretend to love you.

[putsome gravyonit 835]

still gonna need that sixty nine, homey

[SteveH 11126]

The forums were dying, but now they're flourishing. Burning with the heat of 1000 suns. Thank you, JeffreyParties. Thank you. You were misunderstood in your Time.

[Just Add Pepper 2026]

u guys remember the time that a tibetan monk banned himself in the middle of the street to protest the Vietnam war?

 

why? oh, no reason, i just thought it would make a badass cd cover

[Henry 3777]

(The forum is once again at peace. Henry purchased new lightbulbs for the ones he blew out in that funny party trick he learned in college. That magical locket now sits on the mantle, open for all to gaze at while they cozy up by the fireplace listening to their late night Hollywood Handbook radio shows. What of that other stuff about Henry's past? Being sustained by crows at sea, and possibly being immortal and having no parents and no definable origin? And has Hebry reverted back to Henry? Yes, it's all true, but frankly, all that weird interesting stuff is none of your business. Henry takes a minute to give one last look at the forum before he shuts off the light and walks out the door into the night, never to be heard from again.)

[Henry 3777]

Just to clarify, it's just the weird bit that's leaving. You can't get rid of me

[Just Add Pepper 2026]

To be honest, I would be happiest if everyone left the forums because I'm a big mean curmudgeon and I want the forums to just be me posting "good episode, I laughed a lot" once a week.

[Henry 3777]

Those really are the most efficient comments if you compare the effort to like ratios. They also make me LOL so good thinking back to my favorite parts of the episode I just heard XD

 

(Update: I was playing along with the "curmudgeon" stuff, and after sleeping on it, my comment comes off as too sarcastically snarky and mean for my tastes. Sorry, keep up the positivity!)

[Joe Lerini 7329]

So, hey guys, not that you care or whatever, but it's September 8th now (or 8 September if you live in England) and so it is the one year anniversary of my first post in the HH forums. Yeah, one year ago I was a total noob getting pwned by all your 1337 hackz. Remember that one time, early on, someone kept track of all the most-liked posters and I came in dead last? Hahaha, good times! And just look at me now, getting upwards of 5 likes per post. LOOK AT ME, MA! I MADE IT, TOP OF THE WORLD!

 

The show is great, all of you guys and girls that post here are great, and I hope we get at least one more episode of the Handbook, just so Jeffrey has to do that whole bit over again. Peace and love, Ringo.

[Silvrwoman 4998]

So, hey guys, not that you care or whatever, but it's September 8th now (or 8 September if you live in England) and so it is the one year anniversary of my first post in the HH forums. Yeah, one year ago I was a total noob getting pwned by all your 1337 hackz. Remember that one time, early on, someone kept track of all the most-liked posters and I came in dead last? Hahaha, good times! And just look at me now, getting upwards of 5 likes per post. LOOK AT ME, MA! I MADE IT, TOP OF THE WORLD!

 

The show is great, all of you guys and girls that post here are great, and I hope we get at least one more episode of the Handbook, just so Jeffrey has to do that whole bit over again. Peace and love, Ringo.

 

Joe, congratulations! You are bomb dot com and I hope you have a great forum bday. I do remember that ranking post and it was bullshit. I even did the math myself, turns out the post suuuuuuuuuuucked. Ringo is the best Beatle

[Mekhi Phifer 579]

Just to clarify, it's just the weird bit that's leaving. You can't get rid of me

 

(Henry hits "Post" and sits back from his desk with a deep sigh, at last settling his weary body into the familiar embrace of his Eames office chair. Through half-closed eyes he surveys his vast, stately study; there is silence, interrupted only by the occasional crackle from the fireplace and, of course, the ever-present tick-tock of the looming antique grandfather clock just behind him. Yet now, the incessant cursed persistence of Father Time goes unnoticed for perhaps the first time in... well, no matter how long. He has prevailed. Hebry has finally prevailed. With a wry grin, Henry takes one last look at the locket before clasping it shut and closing it into the bottom drawer of his desk. "It is done," he thinks, as he slowly turns to look out the snow-dusted window at... the Minnesota TUNDRA!?!!!!!)

[JacobCrites 4977]

oh no I missed the ending of the bit, can you do it again?

[OcterDoctopus 1079]

Goodbye, Hollywood Handbook.

 

Would've been nice if you could've got Brett Gelman involved, but hey, people don't usually see that I was right all along until its way too late.

[Henry 3777]

Epilogue:

 

Can you believe it, Fabio? This all started with me apologizing because I was worried I'd said something rude, and now I'm here in Minnesota and we're living as a couple of mismatched roommates. You, a young mortal human who enjoys fishing with Gollstone, and me an ancient shape shifting being from beyond your realm. Heh heh, kind of sounds like a sitcom when you think about it.

 

(Henry watches as Fabio struggles to carry a comical amount of fishing gear through the ornately decorated hallway. As he passes through, one of rods, of which he is carrying an unnecessary number of, catches a beautiful antique vase. The vase seems to fall in slow motion as it tumbles to the floor, shattering into as many pieces as Henry's heart. That vase was given to him by Cleopatra after the two of them had a lurid tryst in Paris one unforgettable weekend many lifetimes ago. The room falls silent as Fabio stops suddenly and observes the destruction he's caused. He slowly turns to look directly into the camera, shrugs, and delivers his famous catchphrase: "whatchagonnadoo?". Somewhere far off the sound of people laughing is heard as Henry stands with his arms crossed, shaking his head with an exaggerated look of disapproval on his face. Just then the dark stained mahogany front door is thrown open and a next door neighbor walks in announcing that he heard the commotion and has come to see what the trouble is. Even though this is an obscene invasion of privacy, the sound of cheering is heard from off in the distance, seeming to approve of this man's presence. Music now fills the room. It's of an uplifting nature and the simple lyrics seem to loosely describe Henry's new living situation.)

[donuts 211]

The last few weeks at work (yeah, I have a job, don't go crazy HH heads) I keep hearing people mention a show we're producing called The Young Pope.

 

Congrats to Brian Huskey for getting his script green lit, it's a shame they went with Jude Law as Pope Attitude though, I can't see anyone other than Sean playing that role.

 

Hopefully the next time the teaser freezer opens the boys can discuss it.

[honlads 8798]

Goodbye, Hollywood Handbook.

 

Would've been nice if you could've got Brett Gelman involved, but hey, people don't usually see that I was right all along until its way too late.

 

lol

[Fabio's Socks 1822]

Henry and Fabio whirl to look at the door as the icy Minnesota wind spills in. And who should be in the doorframe but the friendly next door neighbor, whose face is always somehow blocked from view by some commonplace object, and isn't that a funny recurring joke. The distant voices all still cheer, though, because they know that the neighbor is souprman, who I guess is also from Minnesota.

 

Fan favorite Soup drops a funny, saracastic-but-still-likeable line about the odd situation he's walked into, then does a Jim Halpert look into the camera, though that part is less funny because we still can't see his face.

 

(Can we get FaceLikeThunder to do the theme song for this sitcom? Can we even afford him?)