Episode 156 - Movies That Teach Men Horrible Lessons About Sex

[JulyDiaz 2797]

You know how when you watch and old movie and there's a Y2K joke or a WAZZZZUUUP and you think, "man, this hasn't aged well." There's now a whole category of those movies that are just classically heroic dudes being absolute dicks to women. There's even a whole supercut (https://goo.gl/ejmmDH) of all the times James Bond hits women. Just Sean Connery slapping women left and right like he's Moe and every Bond girl is Larry and Curly.

 

Now, hear us out on this, but there's a chance that images like this might have been hurting women instead of helping them. Crazy. Maybe normalizing violence against women or showing Harrison Ford literally whipping (https://goo.gl/QRB2Gw) Kate Capshaw into kissing him have given men unrealistic ideas about how things like consent work.

 

This week Jack O'Brien brings on Carmen Angelica, Jason Pargin (aka David Wong) and Katy Stoll to talk about the modern-day minefield of consent, what movies have been getting wrong about it, why it's so easy for guys to get defensive about it and a female perspective on why it's so damn important.

Footnotes:

 

Carmen Angelica Twitter: https://goo.gl/ATcFbz

 

Katy Stoll Twitter: https://goo.gl/FzYPCG

 

Jason Pargin Twitter: https://goo.gl/pNcIwx

 

Article: Cracked: 7 Reasons So Many Guys Don't Understand Sexual Consent: https://goo.gl/cNurtf

 

Video: Cracked: How To Know If A Girl is DTF: https://goo.gl/bkx5dS

 

Video: Han and Leia's First Kiss: https://goo.gl/HbzMm0

 

Article: Cracked: 5 Things Women Want Most: https://goo.gl/WsEPiR

 

Article: Cracked: Everything A Woman Should Know Before She's Groped: https://goo.gl/pcyEbj

 

Article: Cracked: 5 Ways Modern Men Are Trained To Hate Women: https://goo.gl/UJtzh

 

Article: New York Times: Nurse in V-J Day Photo Dies: https://goo.gl/KFxJci

 

 

Article: Vice: I Want a Feminism Class for Boys: https://goo.gl/7YUFf1

[Simon Lee 0]

Man, aside from Jason Pargin pushing his issues on ALL men, I find a real problem with this stupid logical fallacy:

 

"Let's get all the facts first, that tends to be a guy's first question when a sexual assault allegation is made, but nobody when they hear that your car is stolen, 'well let's see what the car thief has to say about that.'"

 

The problem here is these guys aren't able to apply critical thinking to the problem they are posing, and they reduce below the complexity is warrants. The fact is, when your car is stolen, you don't say, "let's see what the car thief has to say about that" but when someone is picked up as a SUSPECT as a car thief, a logical person WOULD say, "let's get all the facts first before we send this man/woman away." That's the point here. If a woman is sexually assaulted, it is a crime against a human, no different than any other violent crime. If she thinks it is "so and so," that does not make it true. I believe the "experts" at Cracked have probably done podcasts about the issues with eye-witness accounts. Everyone in America has a right to a fair trial, meaning "let's get the friggin' facts" before they're cast away.

 

There are all sorts of situations, patriarchal structures that prevent this from happening, but the issue is NOT someone saying, "let's get all the facts first."

 

These guys tend to think about things with an 8th grader's awe of the world. "Man, what if Jesus wasn't white???" That's great, but they need to quit acting like authorities on anything.

 

Edit: And I started an account here just to complain about this podcast because someone close to me listens to it, and I am forced to hear this nonsense quite often.

[SekouBrevett 0]

Listening to this podcast, I think I found a point of divergence that might be at the root of men’s behavior and provide a way to fix it.

 

I am a Black man and in a previous Cracked Podcast Jason and Jack talked about the dangers of racist ideas that are masked as positives. The popular versions being that Asians are always good at math and Black men have large penises and are super virile.

 

In this podcast Jason gave an entertaining and probably accurate summation of how a young boy coming into puberty views the girls he interacts with. The core of that belief is the seemingly positive generalization that girls mature faster than boys.

 

I know that these beliefs are supported by studies. But those studies are conducted by the same doctors that won’t speak to Jack’s wife about her own injury. They are also aided by women who buy in to this belief and see it as, perhaps, an empowering thought about themselves. I noticed that even in denying having “psychic” abilities, Carmen (I think), accepted that girls matured faster, which validated Jason’s views on his boyhood. (Except for the psychic part)

 

I would argue that it is the seed that all the sexism discussed grows form. Jason’s point as I understand it was that the seemingly vast chasm between who he was and who he thought girls his own age were was the beginning of the thought that was then reinforced by movies. He didn’t say but it was probably re-enforced by the adults in his life.

 

I had a very close female friend at that time, personally, and we were both dealing with something bigger than puberty when puberty hit and I think it shielded us from the trap Jason speaks about. WE didn’t talk about sex but she also wasn’t constantly being told she was more mature and that she should wear perfume or be into make-up , etc. And because I had my own issue I wasn’t being told she had become an alien that I should be wary of.

 

Sexism and misogyny, I admit, are much more complex but the twisted compliment stood out to me in the discussion.