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Alex Cross (2012)

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Action star Tyler Perry?

Matthew Fox as a sadomasochistic mma fighting supervillain?

 

DR PERRY COX?!

 

The trailer alone features every action/suspense stereotype imaginable, lord knows what the actual movie will bring.

 

Needless to say I am jacked for this. Even if HDTGM doesnt do this, do amy fellow earwolfers in the LA area wanna catch a screening?

 

Never cross Alex Cross.

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Hasn't even come out yet...but judging by the

, this has all the makings of a classic. Basically, it's a cat and mouse thriller adapted from James L. Patterson's novel "Cross."

 

Now, Alex Cross was previously played by Morgan Freeman in "Kiss the Girls" and "Along Came a Spider," but this time Tyler Perry is portraying the titular FBI Profiler and Matthew Fox playing Heath Ledger.

 

My favorite line: "You are sick and twisted."

 

Finally it has the best tagline of the year so far: DON'T EVER CROSS...ALEX CROSS!

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I second this. I just saw it today (free ticket) and I'd think it work for HDTGM. The only thing going against it is that I didn't find it to be the laugh riot I've heard some people claim it to be. It's still a piece of shit, but mostly because of how vile it is. I'm pretty sure Cross and his buddy have not learned one thing by the end of the film even though horrific things have happened to both of them; so horrific that it would change anyone it happened to. And what's funny is that it seems to fly in the face of everything Perry has ever made (to be fair, I haven't seen any other of his films unless we're counting Star Trek). I have no idea why he agreed to this, unless he's a hypocrite and just did it for the money. He doesn't make those Madea films because of how wildly successful they are, right?

 

No, that has to just be crazy talk.

 

And for being a detective, he never really solves anything. He figures out one clue but that's about it.

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Actual line of dialogue.

 

alex-cross-cavemen.jpg

 

Alex Cross: [Toward two long-haired and bearded computer techs examining an external hard drive] What do you guys got back there?

Computer Tech #1: The IDE was routed to the BIOS in a weird way, and the cylinder/sector was stored in the CMOS.

Thomas Kane: Yo, yo, yo. Geico Cavemen, what do you say we break that down in English.

Computer Tech #2: We spelunked her email account.

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I'm astonished by JUST how badly this film performed, because it seems like even Tyler Perry's fanbase completely rejected it, and these are the same people that have turned out for umpteen different Madea movies. I've seen the guy on talk shows and stuff and he seems like an alright dude, and this seems like the kind of thing you'd check out if you wanted to see the guy in something that didn't involve cross-dressing, not to mention it's based on a series of books that had already spun off into a couple of moderately popular films, but yeah, this thing was DOA, and while I've heard it's dumber than shit, it at least didn't appear to be any better or worse than all of the other movies it looked like.

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We need more Rob Cohen for this following Stealth and The Boy Next Door.

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