Just Add Pepper

I feel like Jim Carrey in The Number 23 right now. Everything comes back to Taz's weird crotch. why the different colors? Why the apparent airbrushing of his dick area (try zooming in to see it)? Who's trying to hide what, and why? What's the real story, Taz?

Yeah, you think he's shaved bald down there? Either that or his thighs are so big they they're swallowing his groin. In either case, very fascinating crotch and thank you for inviting further observation.

Hey Tom, big fan. When you worked as a writer and executive producer on the TV show Monks, did they provide you with a orange robe, or did you have to buy your own?

I'm a little bit concerned that when they use the phrase "yas queen", they're committing what we on tumblr call cultural appropriation. It's like blackface but worse. Last I checked, Sean didn't grow up as funny girl from Broad City, and he doesn't know her struggles that she's faced as a Broad City person. I'm not saying that his use of her slang terms comes from a place of hate, but every yas queen out of his mouth is a trampling footprint on the back of Broad City funny girls worldwide. Maybe check your privilege a bit, Sean. Also happy birthday baby.

Dear diary, you like it when i write all over your dirty little pages. do ya? yeah,,,, take that, take that graphite all over your dirty little fucking pages not so white now are we, oh look, who's this, it's mr. pencil's friend Penn, coming to give you the double team, yeah, crossing streams, all up and down your nasty little grains, take that, take it all over yeah no eraser tonight baby we're going all over, pressing in deep so it leaves creases you nasty little piece of processed tree til your so covered in graphite and ink you dont even know who you are anymore yeah -J. A. P.

Saw this on my Instagram feed today. Pretty cool to see that word of the Hollywood Handbook program has reached the farthest corners of the world. Looks like these guys even managed to buy the Pro Version. Good for them!

Brotha lovas, coming at you chump suckas Dome a blunt first and then facefuck yo motha No rubba, til she spitting out a slew of new brothas Brotha lovas, kickin on some ride or die shit On that pistol whip grip while yo bitch lick my dick And she suck til she sick cause my girth is legit also we gon talk BB in this trick ~~~~brotha lovas~~~~~~ (I just imagined Bear's voice and cadence and these lyrics came naturally)

It's because he's a postman (9.93 per day) Technically Caitlyn Jenner is a postman. Am I the first person ever make that joke? Maybe.* *This killer piece of wordplay is not a reflection of my ideological beliefs. For an elaborate dissertation on my beliefs about gender neutrality and gender fluidity, please refer to http://greggy.chansontalk.biz/ ** ** Not really but check out that podcast it's good

Oh right, shoot. That could be awful. Like when the rock n roll superstars KISS realized that they had accidentally appropriated the Schutzstaffel logo and had to change their branding in the German market. Obviously it's only a matter of time before HH strikes it big in Germany, and it's best we nip these things in the bud now.

Do you have any movie recommendations? I liked every part, especially watching Valerie laugh. I did not, however, like watching you men make Valerie laugh, because it made me jealous.

I ate fried eggs on sliced toast covered in pre-made guacamole, then drizzled with Tapatio. P good. It would be 100% better if the guacamole was good stuff instead of premade Dole guac. I just thought of a joke for when I'm old. "When I was younger, I used to eat intercontinental breakfasts. Now every breakfast is an incontinent breakfast, because I can't control my body functions."

Very interesting, Ronnie. Now, would you say that 9/11 is a good meme? I my opinion, 9/11 is overdone as a meme, and I'd be glad to just forget it altogether. Never forget? More like, they're never gonna let me forget, with this stupid 9/11 meme. BUUUUUT what if 9/11 was to happen, but with babies, like in the show? Baby 9/11? Now that I like!

I'll get it started, but feel free to let it flow naturally. Did you hear about the [9/11]?

I'd like to make this week's forum thread more interactive and community oriented, basically like a free-flowing conversation between a group of friends, which is ultimately what we are (although I'll slit your fucking throats if I think I can get a like out of it and don't even ask what I'd do for a Sean or Hayes like). Someone please choose from among the following topics, and hopefully we can get to know each other, and maybe even ourselves a little bit better. Work/School As a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up? What is your favorite class in school? Do you do any extracurricular activities at school? What do you like best about your job? What do you like least about your job? If you could change something about your job to make it better, what would it be? Describe your dream job. Hobbies/Sports Do you play any sports? What is your favorite sports team? What do you like to do in your spare time? Entertainment Books, movies, TV shows, music, are all great topics to talk about. What kind of music do you listen to? What is a movie you like that most other people don't seem to like? What is your favorite TV show of all time? What was your favorite children's book? News/Weather What do you think about this crazy weather we're having? Did you hear about the [News Event]? Food/Drink What is your drink of choice? What is your favorite fast food restaurant? What do you usually eat for breakfast? Do you like to cook? Travel/Vacation If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live? Where was the last place you traveled to? Tell me what your dream vacation would be. Dreams/Hypotheticals If you had just won a million dollars, what would you do with it? If you knew that you only had a year left to live, what would you do? What is something you have never done but would like to do? If you had three wishes, what would they be? If you had the chance to start any business, what would it be? Would you rather go a week without your phone or a week without your toothbrush? If you could send a message to the whole world, what would it be? If you had to pick a new name for yourself, what name would you pick? Personal/Relationships What is more important to you, friends or family? What is one weird thing about you? Why did your parents give you the name ______? How have you changed in the past year? What is something you would like to become better at? Describe your perfect man/woman. Other What was the last thing that you took a picture of? What type of phone do you have?

Just left iHop. Haven't listened yet.

any of u guys want 2 fuck?

I felt like my cosmic energy was all effed up, so when I was 18 I kissed a 12 year old girl to balance out the 12 year old boy kiss.

OK! I'll talk! In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... when my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out... but the worst thing I ever done - I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life. PS: My first kiss was a boy when I was 12 years old, my next kiss wasn't until I was 18

You see that Jakal? Now I'm on fire too.

Really cool that the gang now have their very own earwolf artist pages. I don't see one for Veebs yet, but if you guys need a good profile picture for her page, I've got a whole hard drive full of them, so hit me up.

This is grade-A photoshop work, but you won't be getting my highly coveted like until I see you post in the correct thread (currently the Tom Scharpling one). Good luck and hope to see you in the field someday.

I like my coffee the same way I like my women: p in b

You might already know this, but there actually is a coffee called Kopi Luwak that's brewed from monkey shit. Here's a video of Steve Albini making some. Personal note: I watched this video while eating Korean Street Tacos like an idiot, cause the way my brain works now I forever link Korean Street Tacos with monkey shit coffee, and probably will never eat them again. Anyway that's just a little bit about me (ie the guy who started this coffee conversation very famous very cool whatsup ladies)

Oh rad. Free stream: http://www.cc.com/full-episodes/zzt4yt/why--with-hannibal-buress-8th-of-july-celebration--season-1-ep-101

I'm not very happy with this state of this thread. Let's get some classy discussion going. Where do you guys stand on cold-brewed coffee? I just had it for the first time recently, and it's an interesting idea, what I guess you just soak these beans in water forever, and it becomes coffee? It kind of turns everything I know about coffee on its head, cause you're never brewing it. What if you took a cold brew and heated it up? It would be like the bizarro world version of a regular iced coffee, and I bet it would also be pretty good.