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Just Add Pepper

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Posts posted by Just Add Pepper

  11. Posted

    Her brother let his stare linger a little longer than usual as she bathed herself in the tub next to the toilet where he was sitting. She didn't mind, they'd always openly admired one another's bodies like all brothers and sisters do, but this time she wondered if the lust she saw in his eyes was real or just wishful thinking. It had been 8 months since she walked in on her brother masturbating and it had been 8 months since that became all she could think about. His delicate grip, his moderate pace. Slow and steady wins the race. His eyes were closed and she wondered what was making him stiff. Was he thinking of his first love? A cute girl he saw today? Or was he thinking of something else? Something forbidden. His sister. She watched him as he ejaculated and he made a little moan. She saw he was embarrassed even though, as far as he knew, he was alone. She supposed he was thinking of something shameful after all. She slipped out into the hallway without her brother noticing, but she was unsure if that was what she wanted. What would've happened if she'd been caught? What might he have done to her?

     

    Since that day she's been doing everything she can think of to see her brother pleasuring himself again. She's hidden in his closet, only to see him fall asleep while watching Family Guy on Netflix. She tried to talk him into sharing a room and having bunk beds again, but he firmly said no. She once chaperoned him on a date, but found herself overcome with jealousy as he received pleasure from his date's hand rather than his own. That was the most painful twenty-five minutes of her life. That should be me, she thought. That will be me.

     

    Today, taking a bath in front of her brother while he goes to the bathroom, she decides to be bold. She places her hands first on her breasts, then moves them down to her stomach, and further still until she reaches her mound. She plunges herself deep inside her crevasse, her tailbone moving back and forth along the porcelain tub as she explores. She moans softly, just as her brother had done when he touched himself, only she isn't embarrassed. She is rebelling against a societal taboo and she refuses to feel anything but pleasure. This is it. He has seen her desire and now he has to make a choice. Her brother finishes up and wipes himself. She finishes up too and rinses out her gully hole with bathwater. "Gully hole" is something Stewie called a vagina on an episode of Family Guy her brother watched one night when she was hiding in his closet. Her brother closed the bathroom door as he left and she knew things would never be the same. For she knew that though that door had been closed, another had been opened.

     

     

    Congratulations to Sean and Grace. May your marriage be filled with love, laughter, and a third thing.

     

    Could you please edit this and add the word "step" every time you say "brother" or "sister"?

     

    I mean I can do it myself in my head and it sort of makes it easier to j.o. to but when I'm in the moment and the guy is like "you feel so good, sis" I just have this sudden moment of oh god I'm a terrible person and the light is high and my screen is dim and I catch my own reflection in the screen among the expanse of flesh shining with nuru jelly and I see with shocking clarity my own face, my dead animalistic eyes pupils narrowed in the hunt for pleasure and thinking of nothing and no one else and I realize that all I am is a beast put on this world to eat and fuck as much as possible and here I am drinking coke zeroes and mating with a wad of napkins as I read about celebrity nip slips and the brother and sister are now fucking on top of of a pile of old family photo albums and she rolls over and a single polaroid is stuck to her back and it's the two of them at the beach together ages 7 and 9 and the sandcastle that they "built" but really their dad built while they played in the water and used that new skimboard for all of 2 minutes before deciding it was too hard and they kept falling. Step I say to myself, a mantra to the gods of onanism, step step step they are step-brother and step sister step step I am not a pervert step step I am a good person step step...

     

    Many years of marital bliss to Sean and Grace!

    • Like 19

  12. Posted

    Guys I really want to participate in this discussion but I haven't listened to this episode yet. Sorry, I don't know if it's good or bad, so right now it exists in a state of being both things at once for me.

     

    Haha if you don't get that reference you're not a real nerd go take a college class in astrophysics you stupid Abercrombie model lughead moron jock jerk loser get out of here seriously get out of my face I may not be a muslim kid but I'll clock you right in the face you hear me.

     

    Anyway, I know I've been talking a lot about living off the grid and moving into the Alaskan wilderness lately so I just wanted to post this to allay all of your worst worries and fears YES MOM I'M STILL ALIVE I'll get back to you guys once I finally listen.

     

    xoxopep

    • Like 4

  14. Posted

    guys this 100 ep is 2 spooky looks like a coupla ghosty eyes googling at you and he's holdin a knife in his right hand like gonna stab u watch out lol oooOOOOoooo

    how does a ghost laugh in chat? lo000OOOoooOOoo00OOol.

    Speaking of Google, really cool font in your story Jakal, way to pay homage to Google's new comic sans logo (tim wtf?)

     

     

    Anyway, all jokes aside (cause seriously I could go on all night - just ask your mother heyoooo) congrats on the hundred episodes Hayes and Sean really didn't think you could do it, which is kind of embarassing cause I just started listening like 5 episodes ago. Real egg on my face. Keep up the great work.

    • Like 15

  21. Posted

    Origin of brand name[edit]

     

     

    Mattus invented the "Danish-sounding" "Häagen-Dazs" as a tribute to Denmark's exemplary treatment of its Jews during theSecond World War,[4] and included an outline map of Denmark on early labels. The name is not Danish, which has neither anumlaut nor a digraph zs, nor did the name have any meaning in any language before its creation.[5] Mattus felt that Denmark was known for its dairy products and had a positive image in the United States.[6] His daughter Doris Hurley reported in the 1999 PBSdocumentary An Ice Cream Show that her father sat at the kitchen table for hours saying nonsensical words until he came up with a combination he liked. The reason he chose this method was so that the name would be unique and original.[7]

     

     

     

     

     

     

    Haagen Dasz is a filthy fraud, DP, you deserve better. This would be like me posting a picture making out with a blooming onion. Would it be an erotic rollercoaster? Yeah, of course. Would it also taste good? Slather some sauce on that baby, and you betcha. But would it be true, would it be right? No. Absolutely not.

    • Like 13

  24. Posted

    According to Wikipedia one of the recurring characters on Cochran's show The Miller's Tale was played by an obscure no-name actor called Sean Hayes*. I'm really disappointed that they didn't get into this golden nugget of comedy. I mean, it's both of their names! The hosts of the show! Y'know, there's Sean and Hayes, and then get this, this guy's name, is both of those names? Honestly I could riff on this for a book the length of Moby Dick, or even longer, the length of my dick (don't steal this joke please), but I won't because of my chronic 420 arthritis makes it hard to riff that long. Anyway, pretty good ep, but I can't help but feel like I watched Columbus sail right past America, thinking of the comedic oil that could have spurted from this deep, rich premise. Bye.

     

     

     

     

    *Maybe they talked about this on the last episode, but I don't believe that any one man or company can "own" comedy, because comedy is a free-flowing beautiful, wild and powerful thing like a stallion running along a beach, and so I refuse to get a Howl subscription to find out.

    • Like 8

  25. Posted

    Scott,

     

    Thanks for taking the time to talk to the fans. A lot of us are pretty emotional about all of this, and it means a lot to have our comedy hero listening to our concerns, even if they can't all be solved. I for one have a lot of emotions today. My voice is starting to change, and my body is going through a whole bunch of changes. The boys at school that I used to think were yucky and gross, I look at them and I feel...something different. I can't put my finger on what it is, but I sort of want to just touch their butts all day and never stop. Like Tony Scatino, he used to always call me a little piggy, but now he just kind of stares at my chest in class with this weird look on his face. Such a creep! But I kind of like it...Then, something happened in my underwear today that was so gross, I won't even post about it here. My mom says it's normal, and it happens to all young girls, but to me it's so scary and new and I just don't feel like I'm ready for all of it. God, I have to get my picture taken for the yearbook next week, and I've got this HUGE pimple right in between my eyebrows. I'm gonna look like an Indian girl! And that's not racist, they really do have those little dots.

     

    Anyway, I've got some emotions about this Howl thing as well, but it's been pretty well covered, so I won't waste your time.

     

    Luv ya,

    j.p.

    • Like 15
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