babyoilbandit
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Just came to say this exact same thing. I've seen The Room twice now and yet I couldn't make it through 3 minutes of this crap, it's just so obnoxious that I refused to waste my time watching it for whatever comedy value it may have, what an odd choice of film, oh well hopefully the episode is a good listen
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Episode 167 - Chopping Mall: LIVE!
babyoilbandit replied to JulyDiaz's topic in How Did This Get Made?
I was wracking my brains to come up with an alternative title and I've got it. Small B.L.A.R.T. Maul Cop The B.L.A.R.T. Means Bonkers Laser Attack Robot Teens Either that or Shopping Maul -
Something just occurred to me, I think it was Jason that pointed out that the bad guys look smooth as fuck when they travel back in time but JCVD always ends up stumbling into the past on a highway or in the middle of the ocean or whatever - the man they execute didn't just end up somewhere in New York City, he ended up in the middle of the air 20 storeys up. So this makes me conclude that the tech guys are just fucking with JCVD when they send him back, they tell him they can't do anything about it that's just the way you time travel - "yeah sorry Max Walker we couldn't send you back to somewhere safe you totally accidentally travelled back in time and appeared in a sewer outlet pipe. What are the odds right(?)"
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So in the future (our past, or the alternative 2004) the US constitution allows cruel and unusual punishment? They sentence the timecriminal that was doing the stock thing in the late 1920s to a death sentence, no ordinary death sentence though, they send this man back to die by massive bodily trauma falling from a great height. If you're going to sentence someone to death then why not just execute them by future lethal injection or future electric chair or future gas chamber? Also surely if you're trying to avoid fucking up the past then surely removing timecriminals is the least disruptive thing possible, why send people back in time to die when it will only risk changing the course of history, imagine who could've been in that paddy-wagon. One more thing, the only true Timecop is the Time Trax bloke, didn't have JCVD's buns or splits ability but he also didn't let his wife die
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Here's my tagline: JCVD is Timecop - Making history, Making love
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If we get to the end of Timecop without a long derail about Jean-Claude's buns and his splits then I'll turn off in disgust. Now I know someone will say how will you turn off the episode after it has already ended well I'll skip back 10 minutes then turn it off in disgust
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Episode 165 - Ninja Terminator: LIVE!
babyoilbandit replied to JulyDiaz's topic in How Did This Get Made?
Ninja Terminator has the stupidest story I've ever seen, and I've seen the entire Sweet Valley High series -
Episode 160 - The Lake House: LIVE!
babyoilbandit replied to JulyDiaz's topic in How Did This Get Made?
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Episode 160 - The Lake House: LIVE!
babyoilbandit replied to JulyDiaz's topic in How Did This Get Made?
I haven't quite finished yet - maybe someone in the audience answers the question - but Starlee asks why when she goes with the boyfriend to the architect firm does seeing that picture of the lake house want to make her find him. The simple solution is that the brother says that he died two years ago today. So maybe this gets addressed later - I've got another 45 minutes to listen to -
Episode 157 - Surf Ninjas: LIVE!
babyoilbandit replied to JulyDiaz's topic in How Did This Get Made?
As I was watching this I couldn't help but wonder how I'd never seen it given the sheer number of shitty kids films I saw in the 90s. Then when Rob Schneider was doing the whole what-if thing it suddenly struck me that someone had recommended this to me and I'd just never seen it - so I knew someone who not only thought that Surf Ninjas was a funny film but that Rob Schneider was the funniest part of it. Fuck the 90s were bad, good riddance -
Episode 156 - xXx: Return of Xander Cage: LIVE!
babyoilbandit replied to JulyDiaz's topic in How Did This Get Made?
I'm most of the way through the episode and just wanted to make a minor correction that may have been corrected late on but anyway the xXx death scene isn't his whole face it's just his scalp - in which case he could've faked it, also I think this was a deleted scene and not in the actual film. Here's the clip without audio because that's the only one I could find: -
Surely the explanation for the title Airborne is that Mitchell Goosen is mentally airborne - he has his head in the clouds, he's always daydreaming about surfing and being back in California. So when people complain he learnt nothing, surely he realised that with the love of a good woman (or teenage girl in this case) he found his feet back on the ground and realised that life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans. The tagline then should say "Mitchell Goosen was Airborne when he landed in Cincinnati, but it took a special girl and zany sidekick to bring him back down to earth".
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Episode 154 - Highlander II: The Quickening LIVE!
babyoilbandit replied to JulyDiaz's topic in How Did This Get Made?
I imagine you're probably right and know more than me as I have a very vague recollection when I saw it here in merry England in the 90s on whatever it was on BBC, ITV(?) Reading the wiki apparently it was "surprisingly mature/violent", well that all depends what you mean by violent but I suppose it's better than in the TMNT cartoon of having robot foot soldiers so you can cut them to pieces. -
Episode 154 - Highlander II: The Quickening LIVE!
babyoilbandit replied to JulyDiaz's topic in How Did This Get Made?
I remember in the Highlander cartoon that you don't cut people's heads off it's more like a knowledge exchange where you meet up with other Highlanders in order to gain their knowledge consensually which kind of takes the fun out of Highlander - it being about fights to death. Imagine a cartoon version of Death Race 2000 where people score points by high-fiving spectators or shaking hands at high-speed with other drivers -
Episode 154 - Highlander II: The Quickening LIVE!
babyoilbandit replied to JulyDiaz's topic in How Did This Get Made?
The thing I don't get about THE PRIZE being mortality is that surely if anyone wants to die then just don't put up a fight and let your head be cut off. No no no I don't want a quick painless death, I want to die old and infirm, I want to be mortal and work a 50-hour week for fifty years, at the end of which they tell me to piss off. Ending up in some retirement village, hoping to die rather than suffering the indignity of trying to make it to the toilet on time. That's what I want.