Argus Von Blargus

Would Bleeding Gums Murphy do the music score?

Nicholas Cage is American Ninja VII Need I say more?

I now know what every one on my Festivus list is getting.

APOLOGIES FOR LENGTH --- HOPE IT WILL BE WORTH IT... idea: How Did This Get Made Comedy Series I wanted to pitch an idea for a TV-MA comedy series starring Jason, June and Paul. I have zero interest in writing the series -- I simply wanted to get this idea out there. I'm not a writer nor am I seeking fame and glory in show biz. I thought this would be a good springboard for further forum conversation. Please excuse my awful character names. I'm not a professional although I named Jason in honor of Kurt Thomas and Ben Gazera. One of the things that bothers me about the current state of comedy series? No starring vehicle for Jason – it’s criminal. This idea seeks to redress this horrible miscarriage of comedy. Name of Series: Not sure...Bonkers? Bananas? Top 2 Bottom? or just How Did This Get Made (branding tie-in to podcast)? Premise Jason plays basically a HDTGM version of himself Kurt Gazera, a cynical local movie critic for KTLA in the 80s. Note: For simplicity’s sake I will use the actor’s name rather than the character’s name throughout). Jason is fed up with the quality of then current movies and proceeds to lambast a horrible movie every week. He is especially contemptuous of the duds being shit out by Cannon Films. It's The Critic meets the documentary Electric Boogaloo: The Wild, Untold Story of Cannon Films Playing Jason’s foil is Jonah Bailey (played by Jack McBrayer). He is the opposite of Jason full of sunshine and light and loving every movie they review (much to Jason’s volcanic chagrin). Jason’s story arc is that he wants to not just “make it” as a national movie critic. He literally wants to replace Leonard Maltin (and perhaps gets borderline “supervillain stalker” about it). Jason’s best friend is struggling stand-up/character actor Steve Cowen (Paul Scheer). Paul worries that his friendship with Jason will lead to him being blacklisted from the studios so he is constantly trying to reconcile Jason’s bitter outlook on bad movies (Give ‘em a chance). Perhaps a plot point could be Paul introducing Jason to the directors, producers in which hilarity would ensue (“How DARE you…”). Paul is in love with Jenna Balfour (June Diane Raphael), a B-movie diva who is the darling of Cannon Films (basically Lucinda Dickey-- ie American Ninja 3 and Breakin'). June's character acts haughty and contemptuous mostly to cover over the fact that she is stuck with Cannon Films and can’t make it happen with the big studios. She occasionally reveals some vulnerability to Paul and other -- however, she mostly maintains a “diva” personality. Paul and June interact as Paul lands small roles in Cannon Films (but ever growing as he gradually gains success over the series). Probably will lead to a will they/won't they (spoiler alert: they won't. Of course, June falls in love with Adolfo 'Shabba-Doo' Quinones of Breakin'). A sub-plot would be the appearance of Cannon owners Menahem Golan and Yoram Globus (played by Ken Davitian [borat's manager from that film] and Billy Crystal respectively). They of course serve as Jason’s nemesis and hate him – perhaps plotting his downfall. I could also see a love interest between Jason and Jessica St. Clair??? Guest Stars Each week would see a guest star or two playing either a. actual 80s era actors and Hollywood types or b. fictional B-movie types. Alternatively, you could also perhaps cast the ACTUAL stars who can still “pull off” their 80s look (Dolph Lundgren?). I could see Adam Scott, Auckerman, Andy Daly, Chelsea Peretti, Nick Kroll tearing this up. Productions Notes The beginning of each episode should show a clip from the movie in question. Or (if legal issues stand in the way) the bad movies could either be re-written and played by guest star (i.e. like the parody clips from Tropic Thunder). The clip fades out to a closeup of an incredulous, disgusted Jason staring into the camera in disbelief at the shit he just witnessed (see above). He then begins a hilarious, venomous rant similar to his discourse at the HDTGM live shows --- followed by Jack McBrayer disagreeing. I could see Fred Willard reprising his producer role from Anchorman. The show could play well on a premium network, AMC, Comedy Central or (even better) a streaming service (Amazon, Hulu, Netflix). Feedback?