Andrew

The UK does have a constitution. We just don't have to write it down in one place like a bunch of dummies who can't remember their own laws and have to be all "uuuhhh, doyy, what was our laws again I forgot, let me go read it because i'm dumb".

I demand that all new posters show pictures of their cats/dogs/dads/themselves in junior high.

Hayes, "digital content". Speak on that. Sean, how come you guys know all these huge H-wood stars, but you only really pick sitcom writers/actors and improvisers as your guests?

LET'S GO FOR 500!

Frejakp? Does that stand for Freja Keep Posting? I think it does, because I need that sweet TWO HUNDO FIDDY!

Twenty posts in four hours, it can be done! I don't have any stories about those topics, though. I would make a poor improv4humans guest. We just have to reach out for sure thing stories, like so: Joe McGurl, have you had to kiss a lady in an acting? What was that like? SSB, what is the biggest fish you have fished? Tim, what screen resolution is your computer? BRR, what is your favourite kind of potato?

It's good, but not enough! LET'S HIT 250. P.S. I saw Furry, it was OK but not great. Had a couple of gory bits that I guess were supposed to show the horror of war or w/e, but you can't play that card if you're also going to put in countless shots of Percy Jackson: The Lightning Thief mowing people down screaming "die Nazi motherfuckers". I also couldn't work out if Furry the Tank was supposed to be alive like Herbie, it's head (with the long gun tube bit) moved around like it was looking around but there was never a shot of Brad Pitt using controls so I think the director was deliberately ambiguous on that point. Overall, this movie is "tanks but no tanks" (but full disclosure there are tanks in this movie)

I saw a terrifying documentary about ghouls, it had a ghoul that would eat human food, and a ghoul that was a huge marshmallow man, and a ghoul that made Sigourney Weaver DTF Rick Moranis. Please stay safe at this time of year.

So imagine that your boyfriend and your dad have a Freaky Friday-style mind switch, and for some reason you have to do it with one of them. Do you pick the boyfriend-body/dad-mind, or dad-body/boyfriend-mind? (Please substitute for girlfriends, moms, etc as appropriate). I was pilloried by classmates for saying I would pick the mum-body/girlfriend-mind one, but that seems the moral choice, right? Please discuss.

AAAHH! LOOK BEHIND YOU EVERYONE, IT'S COCHRANE'S MOM! Lol just kidding. You've just been pranked by the best.

VB I tried to read your script on mobile but it only let me read three out of four pages, I assume everyone dies at the end though like in real Shakespeare.

It's now one week until Halloween, are we doing spooky names like on The Simpsons? I saw Joe McGhoul and Boozos, but I don't know how to change my Internet name? Pls send help.

Frankly, I consider any account created in 2012 or later a newbie.

So many new posters, serious competish for the Pro Version!

agata pls ban In case anyone needs comforting after that vicious raid by the Wolf Dorks.

Are you now, or have you ever been, a Wolf Den subscriber?

MOVIE REVIEW This week I saw The Judge. It was OK but not great, and had a pretty major plot hole. It has a scene with Robert Duvall shitting himself, and a scene with Leighton Meester in a wet dress, which was s-s-s-mokin'. In conclusion, I give this movie three stars: ★★★.

To be or not to be, is that a question?

But where does that leave posters like me who can't help but lay down gold-standard posts every time?

I did a quick pencil sketch of Sean, it was really hard and you guys should give me lots of likes for my effort.

So I took Soundcloud's number of listens for the five most recent episodes of some Earwolf podcasts, the results are veeery interesting. Looks like Mr Scheer can tell Mr Anchorman to get on down and suck on deez.

Why is Hayes not disclosing his freakynomics connection?

Iliza, Fuck Marry Kill: Sean, Hayes, and the Engineer.

Valerie, did your family sing the Happy Birthday song, and did they pay up to those sisters PFT likes to reference?

I liked this because too often I'll open up one of these scripts, Ctrl+F for "Andrew", and 0 results. In this one, I'm the star that I always knew I should be. (Are we supposed to give real notes? I have a real note but I don't want to kill the mood.)