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sillstaw

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Everything posted by sillstaw

  1. sillstaw

    Descendants (2015)

    All I can think of when I hear about this movie is the excellent 2010 Alexander Payne film "The Descendants." Somehow, I doubt that Disney would appreciate it if I were to release a film called "The Frozen."
  2. sillstaw

    Shivers (1975)

    In other words: A classic David Cronenberg premise.
  3. sillstaw

    Road House 2: Last Call (2006)

    "Dong Loves Movies?" Is that a more penis-oriented version of "Doug Loves Movies," or does it feature the Vietnamese guy from "Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt?" All I know about this movie is that they mention that Dalton from the original movie was shot to death offscreen. Which is not how the best damn cooler in the business should leave this mortal coil.
  4. sillstaw

    47 Ronin (2013)

    Let's not forget that they also took a historic event that's considered quite important in Japan, and threw in witches and dragons and shit for no apparent reason. Try and imagine if a Civil War movie felt the need to spice up the action by having Bigfoot and yetis helping the Union, and you'll have an idea of why that's probably not appropriate.
  5. sillstaw

    Lucy (2014)

    Amazingly, there are reports that a sequel is in development. I mean, never mind how the ending seems to make a sequel impossible; how do you escalate the premise? "She's using 245% of her brain! What will happen when she hits 1,000%?"
  6. sillstaw

    The Running Man (1987)

    Obviously "Rage" has no chance in hell of being made into a movie (if the author of "Cujo" has one of his books taken out of print, you know it's something he's really not proud of). Reportedly, Frank Darabont has the rights to "The Long Walk" and according to Wikipedia, wants to "get to it one day."
  7. Which makes it all the funnier that he apologized after seeing the movie and liking it.
  8. I got 41 with MST3k and things I've seen only with RiffTrax, 25 without. And I like that the title of the quiz is "How Many Bad Movies Have You Seen?" Not "How Many of these Bad Movies," but "How Many Bad Movies." Judging by that name, any movie that is not on the quiz is actually good. So a controversial pick like "Hulk" is "Bad," but a Larry the Cable Guy movie is Good.
  9. sillstaw

    Garden State

    This makes me picture her inspiring Braff to start fighting people and committing terrorist acts, which is such a great image. I wish somebody would make a movie where the MPDG actually inspires people to do horrific things.
  10. sillstaw

    Garden State

    If you remove that, what's left?
  11. sillstaw

    Striptease (1996)

    It helps to remember that both movies are based on novels by Florida writers (Carl Hiaasen for "Striptease," Dave Barry for "Big Trouble"), so they definitely knew what they were writing about.
  12. sillstaw

    Striptease (1996)

    A. He didn't really have much of a career to derail at that point. I mean, he was in "Cop and a Half" only three years prior. B. What's funny about "Boogie Nights" is that Burt hated it so much, he fired his agent for getting him the role. And surprisingly, after that his career went right back to where it was before: Appearing in things nobody cares about, only occasionally appearing in something good ("Archer," "Grand Theft Auto: Vice City").
  13. sillstaw

    Stigmata

    I'm only here to talk about "Rampart!"
  14. sillstaw

    Never Too Young to Die (1986)

    Don't forget that his dad is played by George Lazenby!
  15. sillstaw

    Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2

    Well, that and dying soon after.
  16. sillstaw

    The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003)

    It's funny, because by episode 3 I was thinking, "They really should've just adapted 'League of Extraordinary Gentlemen.'"
  17. sillstaw

    Black Dog (1998)

    Well, it's not like it could be much worse than the official direct-to-video sequel to "Road House." They killed off Dalton. Off-screen. The hell?
  18. sillstaw

    Fantastic Four (2015)

    Eh, that's kind of the deal when you direct something. If he wanted to distance himself, I'm sure he could've applied for a pseudonym from the DGA instead of waiting until opening weekend to claim that he had a better version nobody will ever see.
  19. sillstaw

    Fantastic Four (2015)

    You should've just watched "Whiplash." Not only is it a great movie, she'd get to look at Teller and you'd get to watch him being abused.
  20. sillstaw

    Fantastic Four (2015)

    Recently on Twitter, the director of this movie claimed that Well, sure. I'm sure it's the studio that made him put off all the action scenes for an hour. "We need more origin story! Nobody comes to a superhero movie to see action, they want to see how they get their powers!"
  21. sillstaw

    Sneezing Baby Panda: The Movie

    At least those are current fads. I'd hate to tell whoever greenlit the Pez dispenser movie that people generally haven't cared about them since the 60s.
  22. sillstaw

    Ass Backwards

    See, if the title of the show were to be taken literally, "Ass Backwards" would be a great fit; the movie was apparently so low-budget that Casey and June made the food for craft services themselves. And they had to stop production for two years when one of the financiers pulled out. But the show is dedicated to train-wreck movies, and at worst "Ass Backwards" is just a silly little comedy. Nothing in it is really WTF-worthy enough to warrant being covered on the show.
  23. sillstaw

    The Mirror Has Two Faces

    Great Freudian slip there!
  24. sillstaw

    The Mirror Has Two Faces

    Michael J. Nelson had some great comments on this in "Mike Nelson's Movie Megacheese:"
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