Kylinsky

So I caught this movie on Cinemax the other day, and it has a lot of the makings for a good HDTGM discussion. It's an action thriller with no action, or thrills. It has some really terrible(racist?) Irish accents throughout. Unsolved Mysteries-esque flashback sequences. Tommy Lee Jones is essentially playing his Two-Face character a full year before Batman Forever. Except his Irish accent makes him complete indecipherable. And, the pinnacle fight scene follows a laughable Rube Goldberg bomb through a beached boat that for some reason has a roulette table in it. It really could have been a great movie. It has elements of Backdraft, Speed, and The Rock.. but falls flat on its face, and delivers no tension and laughable performances from Academy Award winning actors. This thing is currently playing in the Cinemax lineup, and I highly recommend it to the HDTGM audience.

Can't wait for them to get into the super racist monkey fighting style of the only black fighter. Who we first see climbing a tree in the jungle to karate chop open coconuts. Even as a kid I thought this was crayzo. I also hope they get into the bullshido of the real Frank Dux, which I think was a contributing factor for JCVD opting out of the sequel, and eventually pseudo-remaking Bloodsport with the film The Quest, co-starring Roger Moore. Question to the thread: Does this movie have the worst ADR of any film ever?

Funny that there were mentions of a Mythbuster special. They actually did a thorough testing of the explosion at the end of the movie. Myths: Shooting a harpoon accurately at that distance: Confirmed Setting off an explosive with just a battery in seawater: Busted Two and a half sticks of dynamite worth of black powder in 10 flares: Busted Two and a half sticks of dynamite causing an explosion that size: Busted Being able to survive the explosion at 50 feet: Busted

Bond girl name: Felicity Foxwell Also, if you want to see Roger Moore in another movie with a blimp scenario, Check out the JCVD movie "The Quest". A movie worthy of the podcast I might add.

Just watched the Tremors marathon on AMC last weekend lol. The 3rd one is just as bad, but probably more fun to watch. If I recall, both the 3rd and 4th movies were made for TV (SciFi Channel?) and after watching them again this weekend, I think they are much better than the current garbage being shoveled out by SyFy even though they are over 10 years old at this point.

Not sure if it qualifies as a horror movie strictly speaking, but.... Arnold Schwarzeneggar vs Gabriel Byrne -----In------ End of Days (1999) IMDB synopses: At the end of the century, Satan visits New York in search of a bride. It's up to an ex-cop who now runs an elite security outfit to stop him.

If The Wraith is on TV. I'm. Watching. That. Shit lol. I love the comedy duo of Skank and Gutterboy. Drinking brake fluid both makes them funny, and establishes them to be bad asses. They would be perfect or HDTGM t-shirts.

Of course, Dice's biggest hit was titled 'Mother Hubbard'....oH!

If I was in charge of Marvel, I'd be livid to see them pissing away their biggest character on poorly written, poorly paced clusterfucks like this move. It is almost as if the Gwen and Peter relationship aspect of the movie was written separately from the villain side of the movie. The Gwen story was the only part of this movie that kinda worked. The villians and their motivations however, were as amorphous and nonsensical as the villain of Green Lantern.. so when one of them dramatically raises the stakes, for no real reason, it was met by me with complete indifference. The motivations of the villians are paper thin at best. Harry Osborne is never depicted as evil, until he very end. Why he goes from a desperate and dying kid to a flat murderer is fuzzy at best. Electro goes from being Spidey's autistic fanclub president to a mortal enemy over time square screen time...really. And The rhino is just an incomprehensible throw-away character with no relevance to the plot, but he made the trailer anyway. Ultimately, this movie is really boring, and a sad answer to the question; Why can't Spiderman be in an Avengers movie?.

Almost forgot! This movie features Forrest Whitaker in some uncomfortably short shorts.

JCVD triple feature. One plot, served three ways. 1.) Bloodsport (1988) 2.) Lionheart (1990) 3.) The Quest (1996) Other Jean Claude action stinkers to be considered are: 4.) Death Warrant (1990) 5.) Hard Target (1993) I would add Cyborg to this list, because it is truly awful, but I think it is also incredibly boring, and therefor no fun.

Clearly, Sharknado 3 is going to need an awesome subtitle. I'm thinking Sharknado 3: Sharknado Alley. Basically a Sharknado hits Texas, where even the sharknado's are bigger. It would have to have a cameo from Ted Nugent, and maybe some 'biting' social commentary about border control. It would also demand a scene where a cowboy rides a shark, like a bucking bronco, through the air. Then we can go, Sharknado 4: Sharknado's Down Under. A sharknado, filled exclusively with Great Whites battles it out with the first ever Crocnado. Cameos from Paul Hogan, Yahoo Serious, and Bindy Irwin.

1. The Wraith (1986) 2. Gladiator (1992) 3. Lady in the Water (2006) 4. Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man (1991) 5. Cat People (1982)

I can't believe no one noticed that this movie is essentially a remake of Enter to the Dragon with the MK franchise pasted on top of it. Our main heroes are a shaolin monk, a cocky American martial artist, and a martial artist with a US military background. Our villain are a mysterious host with mystical powers, a guy with a mutilated eye, and a big strong seemingly unstoppable guy. Shit, even the Katana character has a corollary. Scenes that borrow from Enter the Dragon include(but not limited to): The boat ride to an island, the banquet, the goro/bolo beatdown of an ancillary character, the kano/sonya fight, the goro/johnny cage fight, the shang tsung/lui kang fight. Maybe if they had used a maze of mirrors instead of outworld, more would have noticed how much they tried to mirror Enter the Dragon. Boo!

If you're talking Stallone, in addition to the movies already listed, there is also Rocky V, Stop or My Mom Will Shoot, and The Specialist to consider as well.

Superman Returns... If only because it implies that Superman may have raped Lois Lane and fathered her child without her knowing. But other things to consider the insane genocidal real estate plot by a Kevin Spacey version of Lex Luther. It may also just be the most boring big budget blockbuster super hero movie ever, with Superman going the whole film without throwing a damn punch. A movie so bad it instantly derailed the reboot of the franchise, even with the prerelease hype of Chris Reeve's widow signing off on Brandon Routh as the next face of the franchise.

Halloween 3: the season of the witch.. Nuff said

Ok, so we have all gotten caught up with the craziness of Roadhouse. But does anyone remember the 1998 movie Black Dog which featured a star studded cast of Swayze, Randy Travis, and Meatloaf. Heres the imdb synopses: Ex-con Jack Crews, who works as car mechanic in New Jersey since he's out and enjoys being a good husband and father to his daughter, refused to do it as his license was suspended, but when he finds the bank is about to foreclose on his house, he has no other choice then accept $10,000 for one truck ride all the way from Atlanta. He doesn't want to know about the load, but guesses right as it comes with a black dog, spare driver and two men 'protection' in a car that his long ride is about to turn into a mobile battle fought with vehicles and bullets for the illegal arms shipment which the FBI is after too while Red, who send the load in the first place, turns out to head a gang which stops at nothing to get them delivered. And then there's the legend of the ominous black dog...