ThatWorstMan

. @BillyIdol thoughts?? “@Dr_Cop: Sucks that real cyberpunk bad guys are nerds like Jeff Bezos and not cool AI's in orbit or whatever”

I am going to fuck Satan @gopro

"Bro, there are fuckin' three hundred different ghosts recorded haunting BART!" #hauntedBART

The dog howls. It's time for Kraft Dinner

Pretty rainy today. I'm gonna put on my pignose and roll around in the mud outside until the police come.

My Burly Neighbors

I bet God has a real big dick

Programming languages for professional astronomers, in order of how often I have heard it: FORTRAN, C, python, C++

My burly neighbors are pounding on my door, demanding I make "mancakes" with them #Oakland

I'm gonna buttchug this Metamucil. Call the hospital 4 me in 30 mins plz http://t.co/5FsQazW1

"How much do you like working in IT?" "I much prefer going to my three hour math class."

everyone loves me since I cut my dick off. hm.

im a chef.lol

Ghost on BART. operator is trying to stay calm but voice is shaky over intercom. Passengers frozen w/fear. Spectral moans, slime. #Oakland

.@Happy_Loam reports coming in of the trans-bay tube glowing a sickly, phosphorescent green #bart #oakland #hauntedBART

My human carapace is itchy today

hey my man @BillyIdol how goes it? My GF is requesting a white wedding but we both aren't virgins, plz advise as u know about white weddings

almost time for the annual tradition of fucking a turkey then passing out in front of a TV tuned to the SPEED network

"I am an old man, I just want you to get the governor off my damn lawnmobile so I can drink my whiskey and mow in peace"

They say suicide is painless but no one mentions how funny it can be.

makin cuckcakes

Kyle Varner may be the worlds biggest monster

"Hey ill just pop my girlfriends Lorazapam constantly and post laughably bad instagrams and try to call it art"

Lol a guy just punched his hand through a car window and screamed #Oakland