AdamFlowers

My best friend has a poet's heart. #NSFW #NSFAnythinghttp://t.co/4VCzjHWexG

"#HoesBeLike spades but they have a flat blade," said the Turk Frankel, the former Green Thumb of Komedy®

The sucking noises my wife and I make as we take out our nightguards #SexNoises

The Miami Marlins aren't a baseball team. They're a fake baseball team in an Arnold Schwarzenegger that takes place 50 years in the future

Paul Ryan needs a boyfriend already.

The Epic of Gargamel (I will pay $4,000 American to the first person that can find this "joke" in a previous tweet. It has to exist)

Justin Timberlake - Suit & Tie (Miranda Sings) @MirandaSings @sclautor http://t.co/2zDJPxsrgS

I can tell you taste like Carmel Bugles & Fresca from all the way over here.

Brooklyn: be safe.

50 Cent Yakety Sax In Da Club: http://t.co/wK0ulyuN4z

From "Creole Belle" by James Lee Burke http://t.co/h0OnQGksh4

.@adamsbaldwin Please block me, you moron, I beg you.

EDO GOES POP http://t.co/OOWpDVAYtx

Return to Mayberry http://t.co/EdBdz2r2Wf

I've already seen 4 fedoras in this restaurant.

Did you leave the question mark off of the end of your question on purpose

Happy Birthday, Bix Beiderbecke! - #NP In A Mist http://t.co/XK4cIPy9vr

Normally not a Bill Maher fan, but this quote made me chuckle: "There's Fox for conservatives, MSNBC for liberals and CNN for airports."

COMPLETE World Baseball Classic Brawl - CANADA VS MEXICO March 9 2013: http://t.co/HTg0iKAuaR via @youtube

OMGZ YOU GUYS! The farm lady in Road to Perdition is Phil Connor's piano teacher in "Groundhog Day"! #epiphany #blessed

Psych-Oh, no he di'n't. YES HE DID. @DuleHill http://t.co/J2o118zAjE

I'm surrounded by white people. #SENDFORHELP

How much of my life has been spent fast-forwarding through love ballads on Hip-Hop albums?

Your Saturday morning cry. “@pourmecoffee: Retired government lab chimps go outside for the first time. http://t.co/VaFdL6zrAK”