RikkiHo

Does anybody think that those red targeting grids for the windshields would make it FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE to see while driving? Didn't Kirstie Alley give away her plan when she audibly yelled "this is my insurance policy" into Tom Selleck's earpiece which was on a DIRECT LINE to Gene Simmons? How did she expect to not get stabbed when she showed up with a half torn template card?

You guys touched on this in the beginning of the episode, but I think we need to emphasize the fact that Penny's line when she catches the agricultural bot is literally "YAAAAAAAY!" This is just a theory, but stick with me here: I truly believe that all of the spark explosions in the movie are KISS pyrotechnics donated by Gene Simmons. Can't disprove it.

I think it's really strange that the turtles all call Keno "kid" even though they themselves are young teenagers (Splinter found the ooze canister 15 years before the start of the second movie). Keno has a job and is old enough to ride a moped so we can assume that he is a wheezy teen too, right? Donatello's 3 fingers are WAY too fat to be typing on that computer when they retrieved the ooze. Freddy, the foot clan member who is following April, smells the giant flower before concluding that they are dandelions. They are CLEARLY dandelions. Are you telling me that people are more familiar with the smell of dandelions than their appearance?

To answer the gang's question, Katharine is screaming "it's in!" during the massage in reference to Cash's vertebral disc that popped out when he fell from the belt zipline during the prison escape. Also, Squarecrow ("what else would you call it?") is up there with Rat-brain as far as HDTGM movie insults are concerned.

Some notes: I know the gang mentioned Clint Howard as Tango's cellmate, but did anybody notice that Andre Rosey Brown AKA Big Fatso was Cash's? Maybe Clint and Andre signed onto Barb Wire as a package deal in '96, 7 years after T&C. Here's a list of the celebrity names that T&C drop throughout the movie: Rambo Jabba Conan Mr. Potato Head Stevie Wonder Cousin Itt Bullwinkle When Cash went to the talent show strip club to meet Katharine - didn't Katharine tell Tango in the beginning of the movie that she "had a plane to catch" and was going away for 1 or two months? Since their bust, trial, imprisonment and escape seemed to occur inside of a week, I thought this was strange. Tango tells the fed that prosecuted against him that he needs "more iron in his diet" while pointing his gun at him. Bullets are made of lead, not iron. Finally, during the rainy escape scene, Cash is holding a fence up for Tango to pass under before telling him not to touch the electrified wires. Cash is standing right next to the end of the fence, where there IS NO FENCE. Why didn't Tango just walk around the fence like Cash did???

CORRECTIONS AND OMISSIONS Tara Reid's acting: the only thing worse than her handwriting was her screaming while hanging off the plane, which sounded like the "aah" noise you make when the doctor checks your tonsils, and her "PTSD" face from when she sees her first shark at the hospital. Speaking of which, in another "hero" moment, she tells the 10 year old (played by the 18 year old) "I'm going to save you". I know this movie didn't do a ton of physics research, but a Richard Kind hits a home run with a gigantic, hundres-of-pounds shark that is coming at him at incredibly high speeds. Now he can start eating at the VIP lounge! Speaking of which, why doesn't Fin say "the Mets game" when getting in Judd Hirsch's taxi? Judah Friendlander definitely says "don't mess with a Mets fan on the 7 train" so I don't get why they didn't clarify. Citi clearly did not want their name mentioned but since there are two MLB teams in NYC it's really strange to get in a cab and say "take me to the ballpark". "Take me to that pizza place!" Another dumb "homage" was Fin eating the pizza at the end of the movie. I think they were capitalizing on the post-credits scenes from the Marvel movies (namely The Avengers) but instead, this was right before the credits raced by at light speed to hide everyone's shame from being involved with this movie. Did anyone else want to see Michael Strahan rip a shark apart with his bare hands? He just caught the thing and we never see him again.

I think the first error in the movie is when Jesse "The Cleopatra" Ventura exclaims "HE'S DID IT AGAIN!" after Hulkster starts whooping Dan-Aykroyd-with-eyeliner's ass. Seriously? It's voiceover Did anyone notice that Zeus' only strategy when dealing with someone wielding a weapon (lug wrench or steel pipe) is to choke them with it?

It's the movie that caused Sean Connery to quit acting for good. Amazingly bad hodgepodge of fictional characters cruising around in a "stealth" ship roughly 2 miles long to save the world from who cares. It's essentially an English Lit major's version of "The Avengers".

A few notes on the portrayal of Sonya Blade: In the beginning scene where she and Jax raid the dance club, they gun-butt nearly 80% of the people there. For dancing. Bridgette Sampras' choreography for the pool fight in Billy Madison was more convincing than her battle with Kano. She falls on her ass after throwing a high kick and is standing completely sideways the entire time. Doesn't she look uncomfortable? I'm not just referring to the shorts and the abundance of sand. PAUL: I think a spin-off of NTSF:SD:SUV needs to be ordered: USSFOWI:IFL:SUV - US Special Forces Outworld Investigation: Island from Lost: Sport Utility Vehicle. Was Goro that doubled-over in pain because he has four balls and two dicks?

So many things wrong with this movie, but I'm surprised you guys didn't comment on the incredibly grating nature of Karen Ross' voice. Her tone is trembling, agitated and angry at all times and it drove me nuts. A perfect sampling of this is when she refers to the CIA as "a bunch of loveless sons of BITCHES". Ugh. The five-star reviewer that commended Congo for not using the f-word, boobs or bottoms must have missed the 3 times it was used. Joey Pants exclaims "fucked if I know" and the Tim Curry/Ernie Hudson exchange of "Shut up, you fucking..." "You fucking what?". Oh and there were tons of gorilla boobs and butts.

You are incorrect, sir/madam. I'm trying like hell to pull a clip but I can guaran-fucking-tee you that "fucking" is the operative word. I've seen this movie a shameful number of times and just watched on Netflix this week. This exchange results in Homolka saying "forgive me, travel has made me weary" or something to that effect.

I think you guys need to know that Bull's "Blaster" shirt that he wore at the tournament is available online: http://www.belowthecollar.com/featured-products/blaster.html I honestly don't know why they even bothered with the sleeves, but I guess if you have a wedding, graduation, ex-wife's funeral to go to, you need to be more formal.

One thing I found really strange in this movie besides the plot, characters, interactions, special effects, comedic timing, and use of Pepto was the EXTREME time lapses. Perfect example: when Sylvester shows Estelle Getty his home for the first time, she comments on his messy closet and we immediately jump to his nightmare/butt offering. The rest of the movie follows suit, with anywhere between 6 and 18 hours lapsing between scenes with no set-up or explanation. One of my favorite scenes that wasn't discussed was when Sylvester and his mom are driving back from the airport. Estelle's incessant chattering causes Sylvester to lose focus, and he almost crashes into a semi tractor-trailer. He screeches to a halt, asks something like "HEY WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM MORON???" and the driver responds with "UP YOURS!". Sylvester, either realizing he was in the wrong or already being out of jokes for the rest of the movie, just shakes his fist, grunting "UNH UNH!". Classic.