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kobthatreal

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Posts posted by kobthatreal

  2. Posted

    I just wanna take this moment to apologize to Stephy and yhe kids. Sorry, daddy is stayin out late tonight with the boyz. No little Caleb im not your daddy. Im your daddys friend and its his birthday. No little Caleb please stop calling me daddy. CALEB! If your father heard you calling another man daddy he would be shattered on the inside and those shards of shattered heart would grow mouths and just eat him up inside until he feels empty so please dont call me daddy again thank youuu. Now hang up the phone and make sure you do it right otherwise your grandpas life alert wont work

    • Like 23

  3. Posted

    Dear Drago,

     

    Really no need for the extreme lack of empathy, youre already bad enough cause i hate russians or germans or something aryan and you had to kill a black guy? We get it. Youre a bad guy. In fact it was painfully obvious on first sight of you as you're clearly missing the key ingredient of the human soul, melanin. My beautiful queen, my goddess, and i were just watching this Rocky film finding it impossible to contain outbursts of laughter at the look of all the lifeless white men and women throughout. Thank God the new movie follows apollo jr, a true son of God and warrior of the zulu nation. Michael B Jordan is not only a master of dramatic works and comedy(fruitvale station, that awkward moment) but he is going to show the world the power of true soul as the first Johnny Storm with natures fountain from which all life blooms, melanin, and apollo creed jr as he takes down dr doom (metaphor for hitler "the white king") and drago jr (it has to be ur son he fights and kills right? Only fair.) so heres an idea Drago, crank up that treadmill cause ur gonna need to practice running from the #SoulPunch

    • Like 14

  6. Posted

    Bring that shine baby! We r gonna get straight blasted. Its Indian Cheifs(420smokerbroz) and NavaHOs(bitchez) themed so i guess we can use Spunkys paper napkins as out TP hahaha im already fuckin drunk les just go there now!

     

     

    STAZ u know TYLER is my DAWG so if anyone can convince him to allow ur fine tetas out there its me! I got this babe just treat me right hahaa

    • Like 17

  10. Posted

    I like to think of myself as an early 2nd rounder who will surprise a lot of people. Sure i cant draw or press buttons on photoshop(its cheap bullshit dixon u know it) but my content really speaks for itself. And the fact that i keep changing my name might mean i slide in the draft so it could be a really nice pick up for an already contending team. My go to move is make up a story that uses your standard sex drugs and rock n roll to get likes but I may surprise every now and then with a heart warming story about death. Now that ive made my pitch..

     

    WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT.

    I CALLED SEAN.

    I CALLED HAYES.

    I CALLED TIM.

    I CALLED ANASTASIA.

    I CALLED VALERIE.

    I CALLED ADAM.

     

    I KNEW THE RECORDING WAS HAPPENING BUT NOBODY WOULD ANSWER.

    IM DRIVING AROUND L.A. FURIOUSLY SEARCHING FOR THE ADDRESS TO THE STUDIO AND IM BEING ICED OUT BY THESE GUYS. IF I COULD BRIG UP THE CHAT LOGS FROM CYBERDUST I WOULD BUT THANKS TO THE GREAT TECHNOLOGY OF CYBERDUST IT DELETES MESSAGES. ITS LIKE SNAPCHAT FOR TEXTS. SPEAKING OF SNAPCHAT I HAVE A GREAT JOKE. "BEFORE SNAPCHAT THEY CALLED IT HUDDLE." ANYWAY, THATS THE TYPE OF GOLD U MISSED OUT ON. IF YOU DONT WANT ME TO BE PART OF THE RECORDING BE A MAN AND ANSWER YOUR PHONE AND SAY "SORRY WE CHANGED OUR MINDS."

     

    AND THEN YOU GIVE PRO VERSION TO MCGURL? FUUUUCK ME WITH A PAPER MACHET CONDOM.

     

    P.S. SEAN AND HAYES "I KNOW WHAT I DID WAS WHACK BUT YOU DONT GET YOUR MAN BACK LIKE THAT."

    • Like 31

  14. Posted

    I do not like coffee and i will explain why...

     

    My father was a traveling man and a connoisseur of the finer things in life. One winter he ventured to the Andes and found himself in a tiny village just south of Machu Pichu, where he would meet a woman by the name of Carolina. She was a, in a word, temptress. She lured my father from his pueblo one evening with the aromatic tantalizing sensations of freshly brewed coffee. My father, being so adventurous and really quite a connoisseur of things fine and foreign, decided he would join Carolina in her enjoyment of this hot brew. It was but 30 minutes later they were in the throws of passionate love making when there was a knock on the pueblo curtain, but as you would imagine didnt make much noise, allowing the slippery evil Delabaunte Duforte to finally catch my father in the act! You see many years ago my father and Delabaunte, both childhood friends and travelers and connoisseurs of fine things, made a gentlemans wager that the first to succumb to the devilish temptations of a jungle savage would have to offer up the child born of that love making as payment. But Delabaunte knew of my fathers passion for melanin in the skin of a woman and could not resist its life giving and almost godlike attributes.

     

    My father being a man of his word gave up that child once it was born. Of course the native woman was not pleased but she was assured that boys rule and girls drool. Reluctantly he gave Delabaunte the child, with great sadness and regret as he passed him on, uncertain of the boys future, he whispered to the boys ear, "dont drink the coffee." 26 years later that boy wrote this very story, as he was me. And i am him. Thats right. I am Coffeeboy Duforte, adopted son of Delabaunte Duforte, but the born son of Carolina Pueblolady and John Likesa DaMelanin.

     

    Now perhaps you understand why I do not like coffee.

     

     

     

    Jk its me Chonson haha Chanson will love this one our dads a boat

    • Like 27

  15. Posted

    Blah blah blah great show blah blah

    Nobody reads this shit anymore

    All just focused on their fuckin like count

    I miss my brother Chanson and our dad the Boat.

    I guess i also miss that woman who volunteered to pretend to be Chansons shadow.

    Its weird but i think we're finally accepting it as a family.

    U know this is my favorite type of episodr when the guest is fake mad lol idk they always get my jollys. Reminds me more of RSS days when the but of the joke wasnt always Pete Holmes the two pump chump thats wife left him cuz she couldn't make him laugh which is why he now overcompensates so no one will leave him. Poor Pete, youre so annoying of course everyone will leave u.

     

    So yes more shows like this.

     

     

     

    • Like 25

  17. Posted

    Really goof episode. Did i say goof? Thats a typo its a good episode. But while we r on the subject of goofs i think the real goof is supreme court. Do they not know that their decision is a direct attack on God? Do they not know that its misogynist because why gays can be married but i have yet to see a ban lifted on lesbian marriage. So i double hate it because i love women and God. And my woman is my queen. I tell her every day that her ancestors were kings and queens and she has the source of all life inside her, melanin. Unlike a large majority of caucasians she has this melanin, which i equate to the soul. She is truly my queen with the strength and beauty of a thousand whites.

     

    So great episode!

     

    By the way im Chonson! Im Chansons brother! Our dads a boat.

    • Like 27

  19. Posted

    Shaq meeting Colt Barton? Or are you asking me about Colt Barton meeting Shaq? I remember thinking to myself at the time "you're never going to forget this." but my girlfriend had recently dumped me so i really didnt want to think about or remember anything. I pop 2 xans and down a double jack, essentially eternal sunshinig my brain into mush. I woke up the next day with a size 28 sneaker that was also a rc car and a cell phone on my right hand, and a set of dog tags in my left that read "daddy luvs u colt." no joke his dad types like a little girl or somethin. I check my moto razr and scroll thru the pics to try to make some sense of what happened and every pic is that famous photo of shaq and colt. Now that picture is everywhere... Its like the coca cola logo, yaknow? But what no one seemed to notice the tall slender man in the back of the photo, kinda just standin there lookig like shawn bradley but for some reason he makes me and a lot of my friends want to kill other kids. And if it feels like i gave up on this story half way than you really got my number so call me maybe.

    • Like 25

  21. Posted

    So last night im wit the finest lil biddy and she all up in my bed and she like "papi eat my pussy" and i get this grin on my face that says "ima eat dat" and i say to her "pretty lady my tongue bout to hit the slopes now its up to u to keep those legs french fries or pizza" and u know she went full french fry for yaboy. So im down there waxin pussysophical layin extra thick coats down cuz it bout to be a storm and daddy want the house to look nice. And that pussy my house. Cut to 20 minutes later and shes still moaning for more. I mean this beauty is screaming. Even my dork ass neighbor calls to ask how i managed to fit Seattles 12th man in my house and to tell em to stop chanting "Beast Mode!" so i lift my head up from the laquer factory and tell her to keep it quiet. Only problem is when u got the level of dexterity and finess in your tongue i do its hard for bae to control the vocal outbursts. Speaking of outbursts, when i finally brought the pleasure plane down and we landed in orgasmville she sprayed so much green slime gack at me i thought i was the swamp man. Ill wear it like a badge of honor, but the truth is... This stuff doesnt come off.

    • Like 27

  23. Posted

    Lets see.. Guys, are you looking at this kids scouting report?

     

    6'9 with a 7' wingspan. His ball handling is superb for his size and he's definitely a 2-way player with a defensive mindset. He can shoot the lights out if he's hot. I really think his length will make up for what he doesnt have in lateral quickness and vertical. He's still a young guy. He's a good guy overall... But he's not perfect. He's got some African in him. And I dont say that in a bad way.

    • Like 18

  25. Posted

    Yes Ronnie. Does your six pack pop off or explode onto the scene?

     

    SteveH.. Im not sure what you think youre doing but youre not a Gargoyle Boy yet. When some d-list actor hears about a casting call for the next iron man does he just have to say hes iron man and then he is iron man? The answer is NO! Frankly what you just did was such a swamp baby move that i can smell the pond scum from here.

     

    Gargoyle Boyz is not exclusive, but there is an initiation process. I expect you to fall in line or head back to your clubhouse which is just popsicle sticks with jokes written on them and thats the type of thing swamp babies do its really kinda lame if u think about it. I aint sayin you cant perch up on some towers with us, just dont show up and think youre king dick swinger because he died 4 years ago and his spot is reserved.

     

    Hardall Knight

    GGB

    • Like 15
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